Gay Weddings

Question for Lesbians?

Hi I have a question that I really hope is not offensive so sorry in advance if it is. 

Ok, so my FI and I (heterosexual wedding) are not having a typical wedding party. Instead, I'm having my brother stand with me and he's having his sister stand with him. His sister is gay and hasn't worn a dress in years. So we're going to put together an outfit like a blouse in our wedding color with slacks to match my brothers suit. 

My question is regarding the flowers. Would getting her a bouquet sound like a bad idea? I feel like a boutinerre is insulting. What about a corsage? Or no flowers at all?

If you are a lesbian and were in the same situation which would you prefer? Or would you care?
"Love is like a butterfly; It goes where it pleases and pleases where it goes" David & Roxy March 2, 2013 Wedding Countdown Ticker

Re: Question for Lesbians?

  • I think the best advice I can give is to ask her. Instead of assume what would offend anyone, just ask her. My partner wore a boutinerre while I carried a bouquet, so it just depends on the person. I would lean towards a boutinerre since she is on your Fi's side, but please just ask her! Happy Planning!!!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • Yes i agree, ask her. Every girl is different, gay or not. My partner and I will both be carrying bouquets.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I agree with the others; you really need to ask her.  My wife and I both wore dresses, veils, and opera gloves at our wedding, and carried bouquets.  So you really can't decide what she would prefer just based on her being lesbian.
  • Totally agree with the previous two posts.  Just ask her.  My partner is an absolute tomboy and is absolutely refusing to wear a skirt of any kind to our own wedding, but I know she'd be more than happy to carry a small bouquet if she were there for someone else.

    And honestly?  It's your wedding.  If your future sister-in-law were straight, you'd probably just expect her to suck it up for one day because it's *your* day, right?  I'm sure she appreciates your sensitivity, but sometimes when people trip all over themselves trying to make us happy just because we're different it can almost feel like a kind of homophobia in itself.  I know I'd be a little frustrated if my brother's wife asked me if I needed special accomodations just because I was gay.  It's a sexual orientation, not a handicap.  Just show her the same respect that your question conveys, and if she's a reasonable person that should be more than enough to satisfy her.
  • Thanks everyone! She wants a corsage I think it will look great :)
    "Love is like a butterfly; It goes where it pleases and pleases where it goes" David & Roxy March 2, 2013 Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • glad it worked out :)
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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