Opinions Please!

So I was thinking about the whole BM gift thing.

I was thinking on telling them we will pay for so much on the dresses (anything between $80-$120, still undecided as of now) their hair, jewelry set & a manicure the day before the wedding.
And then something personal (they wouldn't know know about until the wedding day)

Does that sound reasonable? Like not cheap? Because it would be helping them with the cost of things and also getting a personal gift.

Because I do want the dresses to match and between $80-$120 is half of the total price. The hair because I want them to match for the ceremony pictures. The manicure they can get whatever design they want. Jewelry because again I would like them to look the same for the ceremony pictures.
And the something personal that would be something that would match their personalities and style. And be a surprise gift they don't know about.

Re: Opinions Please!

  • LittlinLittlin member
    edited December 2011
    Well it's what you feel comfortable with.  My girls paid for the dresses (they were $200), and their hair (I made sure I got a set price from the stylist so that they would all be the same instead of junior/senior stylist rates - they paid $65), and I paid for their makeup ($50).  They picked their own jewelry and shoes to wear, so no cost there unless they wanted something new.  They also decided whether they wanted to do manis/pedis the day before - some girls came with me, some did not - their own cost.

    I also paid for a room for us to all stay together in on the night before the wedding.  Lastly, I got them a personal gift (I think I spent $75 each) that I gave to them at the rehearsal dinner.  

    All my BM's where from everywhere (Mississauga, Ottawa, Kingston, and New Zealand) and they put it a lot of effort to make it to parties and showers, etc., so I was very grateful.  I think I went overboard, however, and really only a gift is necessary.  Most girls know they will have to spend some money if they are a bridesmaid.  If they are uncomfortable, they may let you know.  Don't promise too much to them, because the money drains fast as the big day approaches!
  • edited December 2011

    Agreed with Littlin, you should make sure your girls are comfortable.

    Mine paid for their own dresses (Although they were only $ that pretty much rocked).  I'm also letting them decide what they want to do with their hair (I already know at least one of my BM's wants to do her own), and manicures, I haven't even thought about.  If they (or some) want to get some done, maybe we'll have a manicure date!   I bought them earring and made their necklaces that I will be giving them as a gift later, and hopefully they like them! (If they don't want to wear all of it that's fine!)

    I think that by you wanting to pay for everything for them is very generous, but like you said, you also want them all to look the same.  Just something to keep in mind, though, and I'm not saying this will  happen as I obviously don't know your girls or you AT ALL, but if someone feels uncomfortable getting a manicure, or having someone else do their hair, or someone different than normal (some girls really just like using their own stylist!), I think it's something not worth getting upset about or fighting with.  But like I said..I have no idea that will actually happen.  I've just read other stories on here of that happening, and I just don't think it's worth the fight to make them do something they don't want to do.

    REGARDLESS of all that, it's nice you also will throw a personal gift in there, and super nice to want to pay for part of their dresses.  Good luck with everything! :)

  • edited December 2011
    I'm not telling them any of this yet until we know for sure.
    Just some ideas. But, having second thoughts on the dress payments!
    It is in the budget to do this. But, I do want to make sure it is something their comfortable with.
    Anyways, thanks for the input ladies :)
  • edited December 2011

    I found a deal on the BM dresses by buying them online. Same dress as was in the store for $50 less. they are paying for them themselves, so I did what I could to save them a few bucks.
    I'm paying for their makeup and buying them each a set of earrings. Probably around $120 total for each girl. They don't know about either of these yet.
    Do whatever you feel you can based on your budget. :)

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