I just learned that my maid of honor (my sister) refuses to give a toast at our wedding. I feel really hurt. She has depression and a bit of anxiety, and giving a speech makes her too anxious, she claims. I don't really understand it, because she used to do speech and debate and won all sorts of awards. She also had to give class presentations when she was at Princeton. But now she won't do a five-minute speech for us. Our Brazilian best man is giving a toast, and he doesn't speak English well.
I feel really upset, because I feel my mom isn't really encouraging her. Whenever my sister wants to run away from something, my mom says okay, and it reinforces the anxiety. If I ever suggested not giving a speech if it were my sister's wedding, my mom would throw a fit. And how will it look if my sister won't even give a simple toast?
Do I have reason to be upset by this? I feel so let down.
Re: My MOH is refusing to do a toast :-(
2010: 41 books, 2011: 31 books, 2012: 100 books
[QUOTE]Ugh, it seems like weddings bring out the best and worst of everything....
Posted by GJones27[/QUOTE]
I'll second that!
2010: 41 books, 2011: 31 books, 2012: 100 books
I've been to weddings where there has only been one speech. It happens. Don't get too worried about it. It'll still be a wonderful day for you.
FWIW, I had no MOH and just had 2 of my BMs give a toast together.
I also have been to many weddings where only the Best Man gave a toast.
My dad was the only one to give a toast at our wedding. No one questioned it, no one wondered if our MOH and BM didn't love us enough or what. I understand that you're hurt that she doesn't want to, but it's really not about you. Anxiety is anxiety. I can't do things I used to do because of it, and it sucks, but is it worth it for your sister to potentially have a panic attack over it?
Let it go. If someone else offers, awesome. If not, enjoy the best man's toast and enjoy your reception.
"Here we stand from two distant lands, brought together by His hand"
2010: 41 books, 2011: 31 books, 2012: 100 books