Maybe I just need to vent some more...

SugarFoote

Maybe like a week or a little less than a week ago, I posted about my younger cousin.

Her and my Aunt have now officially announced her pregnancy all over facebook. Not only have the mentioned it once, but it is now mentioned in nearly all of the posts.

I'm sorry, but if I was 17, unwed, and in her situation, that would not be on Facebook. In my family, it is shameful.

My poor grandmother has been sheltered on the whole story and the news of my cousins pregnancy came as complete shock. Mamaw is tore all to pieces about it and them flaunting the information around everyone is only making it worse.

She is also talking about how mature she is and how she is going to buy this and this and can't wait until "ppl start buyin me thangs for my babi!"...Are you flipping kidding me? I will not buy you the first durn thing!

I feel sorry for my grandmother and for this unborn child. If they don't get themselves together this baby will undoubtedly have a very hard life.

::end rant::

ETA: Her boyfriend or peice of crap or whatever you want to call him posted a picture last night of him with a beer bottle so I assume he was drinking. He's underage and I don't think  someone in situation should be doing that.

Honestly if things continue to go the way they are going, they will end up losing custody.

BMcLeodTeam

That's so sad, I hate hearing about situations like that. The one that ends up paying for it the most is that poor child.

jcsangelpen

I'm so sorry to hear about this and completely empathize with your frustrations. A member of my extended family had a similar situation occur a few years ago and the whole family has been through so much. I do feel sorry for the child, and though his mom is doing a pretty good job of raising him, I think, there is so much better that could have happened. I will keep your family in my prayers.

naomikb

Sounds frustrating, and what a terrible way for your grandmother to find out.

Sometimes pregnancy at a young age can be the kickstart to help a girl turn her life around, stop partying, become responsible, etc.  I hope in this case that this happens for her.  17 isn't too young to raise a child, she just needs to be smart about her decisions from here on out.  I hope that her support system around her with family is strong because she is going to need it.

ochemjenn

That's such an awful way for your grandmother to find out about the situation.  Praying for you and your family.

sessionswedding

I always hear about these situations and wonder how the people in them can't see that they are "that story" again and that it could have easily been prevented.  Praying for your family.

SugarFoote

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_maybe-i-just-need-to-vent-some-more?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:283c5fad-4818-4890-9088-36fda0802543Post:3cb2d74c-edb0-411c-97de-640505c5aa5b">Re: Maybe I just need to vent some more...</a>:
[QUOTE]Sounds frustrating, and what a terrible way for your grandmother to find out. Sometimes pregnancy at a young age can be the kickstart to help a girl turn her life around, stop partying, become responsible, etc.  I hope in this case that this happens for her.  17 isn't too young to raise a child, she just needs to be smart about her decisions from here on out.  I hope that her support system around her with family is strong because she is going to need it.
Posted by naomikb[/QUOTE]

I completely hope they both get their lives straightened out before this child is brought into the world.

They "plan" on living off of government assistance (I know this because my mother practically interviewed them trying to get to realize they need to do something). They think that is cool or something. No jobs. She's a high school drop-out who refuses to go get her GED. Neither of them have ever held a job and neither have been looking for one. I think that is what irks me the most. Yeah she got pregnant at 17. I wouldn't care if she had a job/was actually looking for a job. Or if she was in college. I wouldn't care. But the fact that she is drinking, smoking, dating an abusive idiot who also is a bum? That irks me. Actually that makes me want to slap them both. They screwed up and should at least be trying to be responsible mature adults. Sorry. It just makes me crazy talking about it.

GunzNRoses213

That's rough ... Just love /pray for them /her to leave the guy when she hopefully wakes up

joe&cassie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_maybe-i-just-need-to-vent-some-more?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:283c5fad-4818-4890-9088-36fda0802543Post:2c730c62-4128-4274-a77c-fd6bd52154ea">Re: Maybe I just need to vent some more...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Maybe I just need to vent some more... : I completely hope they both get their lives straightened out before this child is brought into the world. They "plan" on living off of government assistance (I know this because my mother practically interviewed them trying to get to realize they need to do something). They think that is cool or something. No jobs. She's a high school drop-out who refuses to go get her GED. Neither of them have ever held a job and neither have been looking for one. I think that is what irks me the most. Yeah she got pregnant at 17. I wouldn't care if she had a job/was actually looking for a job. Or if she was in college. I wouldn't care. But the fact that she is drinking, smoking, dating an abusive idiot who also is a bum? That irks me. Actually that makes me want to slap them both. They screwed up and should at least be trying to be responsible mature adults. Sorry. It just makes me crazy talking about it.
Posted by SugarFoote[/QUOTE]

Fi's ex is that type of person.  We haven't seen his daughter in a year because she wants sympathy and can't have any more children to keep her current boy toy around.  She's been married twice and now engaged again.  She knows we don't have the money to take her to court but she better believe when we do the hammer will come down.  Pray about it.  That's all any of us in those types of situations can do.  Pray and hope for the best.

ElleB87

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_maybe-i-just-need-to-vent-some-more?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:283c5fad-4818-4890-9088-36fda0802543Post:2c730c62-4128-4274-a77c-fd6bd52154ea">Re: Maybe I just need to vent some more...</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Maybe I just need to vent some more... : I completely hope they both get their lives straightened out before this child is brought into the world. They "plan" on living off of government assistance (I know this because my mother practically interviewed them trying to get to realize they need to do something). They think that is cool or something. No jobs. She's a high school drop-out who refuses to go get her GED. Neither of them have ever held a job and neither have been looking for one. I think that is what irks me the most. Yeah she got pregnant at 17. I wouldn't care if she had a job/was actually looking for a job. Or if she was in college. I wouldn't care. But the fact that she is drinking, smoking, dating an abusive idiot who also is a bum? That irks me. Actually that makes me want to slap them both. They screwed up and should at least be trying to be responsible mature adults. Sorry. It just makes me crazy talking about it.
Posted by SugarFoote[/QUOTE]

You can actually report them to whichever branch of government handles social assistance in your state/country (I'm Canadian, I don't know how the system works down in the US). The fact that they are "planning" to be career welfare recipients may be considerd fraud in your area and make them ineligible (that's how it works in my area, although I am from a different country) since social assistance is supposed to be temporary emergency relief when no other options exist; it should never be treated like the first option or a long term option.

I feel so bad for their soon-to-be child. In my last job I saw a lot of families like the one your cousin is aiming for. PP's are right, it's the kids who suffer. If her baby-daddy is really abusive and already an alcoholic you also might want to get in touch with the Family Services department and have a social worker talk to your cousin. She's in for a rude awakening once the baby comes. If you can stomach it, try suggesting going to parenting classes with her or checking our mommy-and-me programs in your area.

mattycam

This is truly frustrating and sad. God can turn in a bad situation into a good one and I pray that will be done in this circumstance; same for you joe & cassie.