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XP what would you do?

So, currently we are having our reception in a private room at a restaurant. (There won't be dancing, we're just having an accoustic guitarist play background music- and she's allowed in either room) It's kind of small, and if it's raining, we won't be able to utilize the attached patio for cocktail hour, keeping us in that room. There would be about 50 people.

Well, I just learned that my FI would really like to add some more people, and honestly, so would I. We have the option of moving to another, prettier, bigger room in the restaurant, for no extra cost. It's semi-private though, so other people eating there could see if they peeked over the walls separating. Not really a big deal though. Plus it would be more comfortable for people eating because there would be more room, and more space for cocktail hour if it was raining. It would allow us to invite who we would want to without having any hurt feelings, (about 20 more people) for about $1500 more for the increase in food, alcohol and flowers. Would you just suck it up and do it, or stick to your guns?? (We have the money, it's more just about not wanting to spend it...)

PS- We didn't send out save the dates or anything, so no one is attached to the guest list...
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Re: XP what would you do?

  • If you both want to add people, then I'm not sure what "sticking to your guns" is going to get you.  Are you wanting to add these people because you feel obligated and are trying to avoid drama, or do you genuinely want them there?
  • Well.. both to be honest. It's more like- if we couldn't invite them, yes we'd feel bad, but we know they would understand. But then if we just gave in and had a slightly larger wedding, then we would definitely want them there because we would have the space at that point. And inviting them would put us over budget and not keeping to the smaller wedding idea we originally had... But like I said, we could make it work... Ack! I don't know. I think I would just want to hear what other people would do if it was them lol
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  • It sounds like you really do want them there and since you have the funds I say invite them.

  • I can't really answer the question.  I mean, for me it would really depend on who it is.  The best advice I can give is to figure out which is more important to you, the smaller party and saving money or the bigger party with everyone included.

    My mom's advice in situations like this is to flip a coin.  As the coin is in the air, see which way you're hoping it comes out and/or how you feel once you see the outcome.  That will tell you what it is you really want.
  • Decide what's more important to you. The money or the size of the wedding. You're right, people will understand if you keep it small, but it's totally up to you. I would figure out where that money will end up if it doesn't go to the wedding and then decide which is more important. It helps me to have concrete things, so wedding size or pay off a loan? Thats what I would do. 
  • I think I've talked myself into the larger room. It will just be easier to avoid hurt feelings and will be nice to have those folks there. That's what savings are for I guess! And the room is way prettier, despite it being semi-private, so there's that...
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  • It sounds like you honestly want these extra people there, so I say if you can then do :)
  • If you can ... go for it .. We have a large room but I had to take it down to 150 .. And that's even more then I wanted numbers wise..but people wise it's who is coming that i'm excited about ... Although my deadline is comig up and i['m about to beat down some doors
    Love is All You Need
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