children- a poll

aggiebug

How many kids do you want?

when do you plan on starting?

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?

aggiebug

1 I want 3 H wants 2 we have settled on 2.5 )

2 in 1.5-2yrs  obviously God may have other plans.

3 Adoption is top of my list for me.  My sister was adopted as is my niece (and several of my cousins) so it is an easy decision for me.  I have talked to H about my fears of infertility and obviously we both agree that God will show us the way but I know that H has a lot more reservations about adoption than I do.  Of course he said we will do anything necessary to have kids and we will cross that bridge together when we need to. 

I personally don't feel like I can go through with infertility treatments for so many reasons. 

sessionswedding

How many kids do you want?
One, maybe two.

When do you plan on starting?
Around our 5th wedding anniversary, so age 28 for both of us.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
Infertility treatments.  If that doesn't work, we'll just not have children.  FI and I have discussed adoption and don't think it would be right for us.

drama1308

How many kids do you want?
3-4, maybe 5. We'll see

When do you plan on starting?
In a few years. (2-3 years depending)

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
Keep trying. Possibly adopt. We haven't really talked about this.

yodacub

How many kids do you want?
2-3

When do you plan on starting?
2 years after we're married

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
FI brought up struggling to concieve shortly before we got engaged, we agreed that adoption is a possiblility.

SoonToBeGenao

How many kids do you want?
I want 4 or so, FI only wants 2- I'm really hoping that we can agree to compromise on 3.... or 4 :-P

When do you plan on starting?
I plan to come off the pill and just let God decide when the time is right anytime after our 1st anniversary (I'll be 26- FI will be 30)

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
I would never stop trying. But I would absolutely adopt or look into starting Foster Care. FI and I have discussed this but only God knows at this point.

aggiebug

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_children-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:4b94f942-c4f3-48ba-a705-cc4ab8be8776Post:20bb5c39-6495-4a23-b438-4b08dfe4970d">Re: children- a poll</a>:
[QUOTE]How many kids do you want? I want 4 or so, FI only wants 2- I'm really hoping that we can agree to compromise on 3.... or 4 :-P When do you plan on starting? I plan to come off the pill and just let God decide when the time is right anytime after our 1st anniversary (I'll be 26- FI will be 30) If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?<strong> I would never stop trying. But I would absolutely adopt or look into starting Foster Care</strong>. FI and I have discussed this but only God knows at this point.
Posted by SoonToBeGenao[/QUOTE]

Yes me too I wouldn't stop trying.  and I really think it would be awesome to foster kids but that is something H and I have NOT discussed so I don't know if it is in the cards for us.

RebeccaJac

How many kids do you want? 2-4. 

when do you plan on starting? Probably around our 5th anniversary.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action? Adoption. We already want to adopt regardless of if we have biological children.

GJones27

How many kids do you want?  I want 2, DH wants 3.

when do you plan on starting?  After I graduate from law school and get settled in a job... probably when I'm 31 or so.  

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?  In my case, there is a possibility I may struggle to conceive.  It remains to be seen.  I think we would first consult with our priest to see what infertility methods may be possible.  I would love to adopt, but my biggest concern is what the child would be like (major health or emotional problems... I know people who've gone through some very serious issues).  I also hope we'd have the money.

Purple&7

How many kids do you want?
We will probably have 2

when do you plan on starting?
Probably around our 5th anniversary. I would like to finish schoool first.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
We would probably look into adopting.

aggiebug

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_children-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:4b94f942-c4f3-48ba-a705-cc4ab8be8776Post:9ece8cb3-be21-46ec-9423-9de5ed6414d9">Re: children- a poll</a>:
[QUOTE]How many kids do you want?  I want 2, DH wants 3. when do you plan on starting?   After I graduate from law school and get settled in a job... probably when I'm 31 or so.   If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?  In my case, there is a possibility I may struggle to conceive.  It remains to be seen.  I think we would first consult with our priest to see what infertility methods may be possible. <strong> I would love to adopt, but my biggest concern is what the child would be like (major health or emotional problems... I know people who've gone through some very serious issues).  I also hope we'd have the money.</strong>
Posted by GJones27[/QUOTE]

Don't get me worng because I totally understand that adoption is not for everyone.

But what are the risks of those problems with a bilogical child? ya know? I really don't think the risks are THAT different and those that you can "control" are typcially known at adoption.  ( ie drug addictions FAS etc

SuMmErKuTiE

How many kids do you want? We're thinking 3, but after 2 we'll see where we stand.

when do you plan on starting? Maybe some time in the next year. I just started my last BCP pack and it's such a weird feeling to think after all these years of taking it, that this is it. I still don't feel like I'm ready, but just because I won't be on the pill anymore doesn't mean I'm necessarily going to get pregnant right away. We'll see what happens, and we're just trusting God to give us children in His perfect timing.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action? Adopt.. there are so many children out there in need of a good home. We've discussed adopting overseas and here in the US. But hopefully we won't have any issues conceiving ourselves, but we have also discussed having a biological child or two and then adopting a child in need.

fpaemp2011

How many kids do you want?
At least 4.

when do you plan on starting?
At least by our first anniversary.  We're praying about starting this fall,and will seriously discuss it once we can get our joint health insurance activated.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
Adoption.  I don't think we would go through treatments.  We're also praying about adopting a child with Down's Syndrome or similar diagnosis through Reece's Rainbow, an international special needs adoption ministry.

Ccsvball05

How many kids do you want? 2-3, I would love to have twins!

when do you plan on starting? I plan to come of my BC in December after I graduate.


If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action? I would LOVE to adopt, but my DH is not so sure about the idea and the money would also be an obstacle. We may look into fostering later on. I know people say it is hard to have the possiblity of having the children taken away from you, but I know that we would love them. If noone else in their life were to love them, then they would certainly know we did! (We run a  bus route for church and I have this mindset with those kids)

musicalsunlight

1. I want 3-4, J wants 2. I would be OK with 2, but hopefully he will want more.

2. There is no set time, but probably in 3 or so years. Enough time for us to finish grad/law school and get a job secure (hopefully). J wants to start earlier than later.

3. If infertility treatments do not work, I am open to adoption.

AshNoel8

How many kids do you want? I want at least 4, but H wants only 2... If money were not an issue, I'd want 6-8! I love kids and I want as many as God wants to entrust us with (maybe not as many as the Duggars though!) But I do know that children are a large expense, so we'll see. 

When do you plan on starting? If it were up to me, we'd start now! But H wants to wait until we are married a year. Really, it's in God's hands. 

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action? We have talked about adoption and said (as long as we can afford it) that we would like to do that. We have not talked about infertility treatments, but I would like to try that too. 


PS- for those of you on the pill who are talking about coming off it to try to get pregnant... You probably already know this, but it is recommended to use other forms of birth control after you stop taking the pill for 3 months because they say your baby can have birth defects if you get pregnant during that 3 month period. I don't think it's extremely likely to occur, but I know I wouldn't want to take any risks. Just a thought for you girls.    

AshNoel8

PS- not sure why my post is in a column like that! Sorry! 

faith415

How many kids do you want?
At least 4!
when do you plan on starting?
We want FI to finish school and get a job first so we want to wait till our 2nd anniversary, but we'll see what happens. We both really love kids so it might end up being sooner.
If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
I personally would love to adopt, but FI doesn't know how he feels about it. I hope that if this does become an issue that he would be more open to adoption. His aunt and uncle are looking into adoption now, so that might make him more comfortable with the idea.

mrandmrsbrist

How many kids do you want?
2. 3 is my limit.

When do you plan on starting?
In about 2 years. Maybe longer.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
This is a really real possibility for me. Foster care and/or adoption.

letyourselfgo

How many kids do you want?
I have one from a previous marriage, and he wants one more.

when do you plan on starting?

Not sure. Some time after the wedding....so maybe in 2014. I'll be 30, he'll be turning 29.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?

Adoption.

aggiebug

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_children-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:4b94f942-c4f3-48ba-a705-cc4ab8be8776Post:1919bf4c-b876-4d77-a9a6-8ff9cfca0efe">Re: children- a poll</a>:
[QUOTE]How many kids do you want? At least 4! when do you plan on starting? We want FI to finish school and get a job first so we want to wait till our 2nd anniversary, but we'll see what happens. We both really love kids so it might end up being sooner. If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action? I personally would love to adopt, but FI doesn't know how he feels about it. I hope that if this does become an issue that he would be more open to adoption.<strong> His aunt and uncle are looking into adoption now, so that might make him more comfortable with the idea.</strong>
Posted by faith415[/QUOTE]

It really can and will. 

I was "lucky" because I grew up knowing my older sister was adopted.  There was no question that she was MY sister and MY parents daughter, granddaughter cousin etc. 

When my sister announced they were going to adopt a little girl I was surprised by his parents reaction.  They were very unsure about everything.  Including if they would love her like their other grandchildren.  Since she has been in the family for 3 years now it is obvious there is no other place she should be.  And her grandparents DO love her as their granddaughter and that is what she was meant to be.  Having adoption in the family really changed their view of it. 

H was around when my sister adopted my niece so he has had at least some experience and understand, but I know some of his reservations come from wondering what his family will think.  Its natural. 

sprtychick10

How many kids do you want?

2

when do you plan on starting?
2-3 years after being married

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?

I would try fertility treatments and do what we could afford. If that didn't work out, I would turn to adoption.

BronwynH

How many kids do you want?
2...maybe more or less....just depends.

when do you plan on starting?
We're going to wait at least 5 years.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
We already plan on adopting. We would not do infertility treatments.

LeahVB2011

How many kids do you want?
At least 2 but as many as God will allow us to have. Once we start trying for a baby and I go off BC, I won't go back on it. I might try NFP/FAM especially to help concieve

when do you plan on starting?
If we could afford to we would start now but we can't afford it and I want my BA. We will probably start trying my senior year.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
Adopt / pray but like PPs have said, we won't stop trying.

GJones27

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_children-poll?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:4b94f942-c4f3-48ba-a705-cc4ab8be8776Post:b5236642-1896-42b6-8a7c-cf37433f83a7">Re: children- a poll</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: children- a poll : Don't get me worng because I totally understand that adoption is not for everyone. But what are the risks of those problems with a bilogical child? ya know? I really don't think the risks are THAT different and those that you can "control" are typcially known at adoption.  ( ie drug addictions FAS etc
Posted by aggiebug[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah, true.  I'd love to adopt as long as there is a reasonable expectation of a child being healthy.  I just know of instances where the adopted kid was abused as a baby or while as a fetus, and symptoms didn't show up until later.  Chances are small, but it makes me nervous a little because you can't control for that.  I'm still open to the idea of adoption, though.  </div>

Bett2012

1. 2-3

2. depends on alot, like jobs.  We're still in school, so if I get a job before FH does, we will wait until he has a steady job since we plan for me to be a stay-at-home-mom. Otherwise, I'd be good to go as soon as that happens! We'll see though.

3. Adoption.  I've thought about Foster Care, and it scares/bothers me to think that even after you take in a child they can be taken out of your house. I would need to look into it more, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to be able to deal with having my child taken from my home (even if they're not legally ours, they would be in the sense of the home)

FaithCaitlin

We want 2 kids. We plan to start when I'm 26 and be done by 30! If we cannot conceive, we want to adopt!

DramaGeek

1 - 0

2 - Never

3 - N/A

Everyone told us we'd change our minds.  We've both said we didn't want any kids since we started dating at 19.  We're 30 now and have been married almost 9 years, and we still haven't changed our minds.  Our deal is that if one of us does change our mind and want kids, we are welcome to bring that up with the other, but we will only have kids if we both want them.

I have a strong suspicion that our nephew will end up living with us at some point, though.

LittleBigO

How many kids do you want?
1...MAYBE two?

when do you plan on starting?
4 years or so?

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?
Pray and try fertility treatments.  If we can't get pregnant, we're not suppose to and I'd pray for peace and understanding, as well as wisdom on whether to adopt or what to do.  :P

kalizoomba

We don't want any children. I've never been fond of the idea. I enjoy playing with other people's kids, but wow, it's so nice to send them home at the end of the day!!  I have a lot of respect for moms. I could never do half of what they do. FI doesn't want kids either. (FMIL is SOOOOO mad at us - she want's grandkids soon. Her other son probaby won't have any for a while, he's in the Navy, and has no interest in getting married any time soon)

We may adopt in the future, just because i feel sorry for those kids who don't have families, but probably not. 

ochemjenn

How many kids do you want? 1 or 2 to start, DH and I haven't talked specific numbers.

when do you plan on starting?   When we have plenty of land for the kids to graze on.

If you struggle to concieve what would be your plan of action?  We plan on adopting, but many shelters don't have kids.  We'll look into this more when we're not in an apartment.  I don't think kids are approved pets.

This is obviously about kid goats.  DH and I don't want human kids.  Sorry, I wanted to participate!