Officiant Honorarium

BekahL90

I'm trying to figure out how much I should give our pastors as an honorarium. My pastor is officiating and FIs pastor is giving a message. I don't want to be skimpy, but at the same time, our pastors are dear friends of ours who we have known for many years, so it's a little different than just employing a random minister who neither of us know. Any ideas on how much would be appropriate to give them?

fpaemp2011

FIL officiated our ceremony and made it very clear he would not accept any form of payment from the very beginning.  However, my 3 pastors said a prayer, gave the Gospel message, and did the Cord of Three Strands. Mom and and dad gave them $50 each.  My worship pastor did all of the music, and mom and dad gave him $150 because he played the prelude, throughout the ceremony, and he had to learn so many songs.  I think if we had a different pastor officiate, they would have given him $150-200.

Hopefully that helps you a little.

naomikb

We paid our minister $200 to officiate the whole service, our musicians were paid $150 each.  That was separate from the use of the church - there was no defined church fee so we donated $500.  HTH.

GJones27

I recommend asking someone like the secretary about what the suggested amount is.  That could help avoid an uncomfortable situation while avoid breaking the bank.  That's what I did in my situation.  If you have already made a yearly donation, you probably won't have to pay much.
I forget the exact amount, but I think we paid around the recommended amount -- $800.  Typically in my city (San Francisco), officiants are paid about $1,000.

If my family had already donated to the church for the year, they recommended not paying anything.  FI and I didn't know the new priest there, as I had lived in a different city for the previous eight years.  My family used to be a part of that church community (I attended the school associated with the church and attended Sunday services and school for many years).  However, once I left, my mom stopped going to church there, so it was like we weren't part of the community for a while. 

We also had an organist and paid him $300, which was the recommended amount.   

RebeccaJac

We are paying $800

It's good to consider how many hours they put into your wedding. It takes probably 5 hours (at minimum) to write the message, then there's the hours in premarital counseling spent with you and the time spent planning the wedding. Calculate how many hours that would be and a fair hourly rate. This is their job, even if they are friends with you. They are working overtime for weddings. Our minister is a VERY close friend, but that doesn't negate that they're still working many more hours to be able to preform our day. 

Are there other pastors on staff you could ask? 

mrandmrsbrist

My grandpa officiated and he, like Emily's FIL, would not accept payment. We had a minister from our church give a message and he wouldn't accept payment either. We payed the musician (a friend) $450. She played the ceremony music and through the reception (which was around 3 hours).