How do you stay on top of things?

DramaGeek

I've been fighting this battle 9 years and I have yet to win.

No, not a fight with my husband.  With my house.  I cannot stay on top of dishes or laundry or cleaning or clutter or even the garbage to save my life!  Right now there are 3 loads of laundry that need to be folded, two that are folded and need to be put away, and several more that need to be done.  I have piles of things that need to go to Goodwill.  The sink is full of dishes.  Our bedroom dresser is full of stuff, mostly things that need to be thrown away.

Obviously I am not alone in creating this mess, but I certainly have a (large) hand in it.  H does do a lot but neither of us is an inherently neat or clean person so it's really hard.  We're battling both of our innate natures and we are definitely losing.

I've tried Flylady and Sidetracked Home Executives to no avail.  I need something even simpler, more remedial than that I guess.  Anyone have a success story to share of how they overcame their nature in order to keep a clean house?

drama1308

Let me know when you get on this. lol.I feel like we are never going to get everything put away in our house and it will permanently be a mess. I know we just moved in, but I'm feeling exactly the same way that you are about it.

MelissaC315

Haha I'm pretty sure I'm losing this battle myself.... I can never seem to get ahead and I always try to. Between grad school, working, planning my wedding, and attempting to have a life haha... it never gets done.

porky

I have a hard time keeping my apartment clean too.  For some reason, I seem to be the only one who cares about how the apartment looks.  To make matters worse, my shower was this past weekend and my dining room and table are COVERED in gifts.  There is no place for them. 

agape1cor813

I used to have a terrible time keeping things clean, especially when I was living by myself and never had anyone over to visit. Dishes would sit in the sink for days, Dirty clothes would be all over the floor, etc.

Our apartment is OK now, but we've been here about four weeks and we haven't hardly had time to really organize anything so there is still more clutter than I would like to admit. Thank goodness our extended families are staying away this weekend so we can actually really get settled.

I often feel like I'm losing the battle, but I figure if I do one or two things a day then that is fine; it's a marathon, not a sprint.

AllyG303

FI.  He is a neatfreak (most times) and a most excellent cleaner.  The Air Force taught him well.  Left to my own devices, the mood strikes me to clean about once a month. 

RebeccaJac

I was told to get in the habit of cleaning up as you go about life. Fold the laundry right out of the dryer, do the dishes right after dinner, do it in small doses so it's not a big pain in the you-know-what. 

Now, do I do that? Heck no. My house is probably worse than yours. But in theory it makes sense

abbeylynne06

The best thing we do is have a 10-15 minute "cleaning blitz" in the evening when DH and I are both home.  We set a timer for either 10 or 15 minutes and clean whatever we can during that time. 

A lot of the time, we'll end up cleaning past when the timer goes off, because once you're in cleaning mode, it's easy to keep going.  It's worked pretty well for us, and 10 minutes every/every other day really helps to keep the little things like dishes, laundry, and clutter down.  I find that when the house looks clean and the little things are taken care of, it's much easier to find time and motivation to do some of the bigger things (laundry, vaccuum, clean bathroom, etc)

sessionswedding

I clean as I go.  I think I might be OCD or something, because clutter drives me INSANE.  Like right now, FI and I are living out of a broken dresser because we are still working on replacing the one that broke when we moved, and having clothes out on the floor (because the drawers won't fit in the broken frame) bothers me so much that I can't stand to be in the bedroom unless I'm asleep.

FI and I have a deal where we have split up all the chores, and we are both pretty good about getting them done.

Also, it helps that I was raised fairly Southern on this point.  Your house should always be within 10 minutes of being ready for company, or something like that, lol.  And I was raised that "ready for company" pretty much meant spotless.  So I do laundry and dishes as I go, vacuum and sweep weekly, mop and scrub bathroom surfaces biweekly, etc.  FI was raised in a home with a weekly maid service, so he's used to everything being clean, and I think it bothers him too when things get messy.

SuMmErKuTiE

I have OCD and can't go to bed if I know there are dirty dishes in the sink or clothes on the floor, etc.. DH could care less, plus he knows I can't just let it go. It's a sickness I tell you! Haha..

I have to admit though that last weekend, after we got back from our cruise and our friends were staying with us since they couldn't get a flight back to CT due to the hurricane for a few days that I let it go. Our suitcases were open in our room and clothes were everywhere! I've done 3 loads of laundry since then and everything's finally back in order. But I was so exhausted those few days to care.
Aside from my OCD, we have split up the household chores without ever really talking about it. We just do our own things to keep everything running smoothly.

I take care of:

~Most meals, including packing our lunches for work
~Cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms
~Laundry (I also put it away, because it has to be put away a certain way)
~Making the bed and picking up things that could contribute to clutter around the house
~All the bills and monitoring of our checking and savings accounts (which is funny considering DH is an accountant)

DH takes care of:

~Taking the dog out
~Taking out the garbage and recycling
~Cooking on the grill (I tried this once, and ended up burning our food to a crisp)
~All the yardwork.. mowing the lawn, taking care of the bushes, the irrigation, picking up dog poo, etc.. )
~Sweeping and mopping the floors
~Vacuuming (including the couch due to dog fur)

All of these tasks have been known to be performed by the other person, but usually this is who takes care of what.

mrandmrsbrist

As I sit here and write this, there's a load of laundry that needs to be done, the floors need to vaccumed, there are dishes in the sink from dinner last night, and the bed is not made.

It's so crazy for us right now that I'm okay with the apartment looking this way. Plus, we still aren't all the way unpacked. I don't have any tips to offer, because I'm home during the day and I just clean it up throughout the day as I go...

ochemjenn

For me laundry is a mindless task, so I turn the TV on when I iron, fold, and put away.  When I didn't have a tv in my room, Irocked out to some fun music.

Otherwise I'm not good with staying on top of cleaning.

azdancer8

I feel you, OP. I *always* feel behind. We're not too bad right now, since DH did a lot on Monday, but even with an extra day and a half off each week, I still find myself too lazy or too busy to clean everything. :P

faith415

Typically, I'm super messy and not that bothered by it. My mom was always a neat freak, but let the battle with us and our rooms go. So as long as my mess was contained to my room it wasn't a problem. When I lived with three roommates everything always was a mess because two of my roommates were really messy and no one wanted to clean up other people's mess. Now that I live on my own I've been really trying to keep the apartment clean, especially since I know FI will be moving in in a few months!
I wash all the dishes before I go to bed. I don't always take them out of the drying rack as quickly as I should, but at least they're in there clean and not in the sink. On Saturdays I vaccuum, sweep, and mop the whole place. Then I clean all the counters in the bathroom and kitchen. Laundry I do as needed, but I always fold it when it comes out because I hate when my clothes get wrinkly! I found that giving myself a more set schedule really makes me do the work. One week I was gone on Saturday and couldn't clean and it drove me crazy till I had time to get to it!

ElisabethJoanne

If I had 5 loads of laundry milling about, I'd have nothing clean to wear and would be sleeping on just a mattress, no sheets. I'd seriously suggest enlarging that off-to-Goodwill pile. When it's finally a choice of being stinky or doing laundry, the laundry gets done.

Here's what's helping me:
1) I stopped feeling guilty about taking away "us" time for me to clean. We're not married; we don't life together. We mostly only see each other on weekends, which is also the only time I have to clean, as I'm routinely out at work+gym past midnight during the work week. Cleaning can be quality time. He helps, or we can talk while I do dishes or whatever.
2) I stopped feeling guilty about not cleaning. Spots on my mirror do not mean I'm a bad person. Same with clothes scattered over the floor. "Cleanliness is next to godliness" is not in the Bible. If I want to go to a museum instead of cleaning the apartment, so be it.
3) I encourage myself to savor the atmosphere when the apartment is clean. This encourages me to keep it clean. We spent a few hours cleaning Sunday, and now the blankets that usually would be tossed around the living room have stayed folded. The clothes that usually would cover the bedroom floor are in the hamper.

Like so much in relationships and individual maturation, it's a balance between letting things go (whether that's "quality time" or dirty dishes) and taking time for yourself (again, whether that's "quality time" or doing the dishes).

AshNoel8

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_stay-top-of-things?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:6957bbcf-7ca6-4538-b34c-6b18f4867620Post:e5af7c0d-adff-4eca-9d8e-64063aaa86d2">Re: How do you stay on top of things?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have OCD and can't go to bed if I know there are dirty dishes in the sink or clothes on the floor, etc.. DH could care less, plus he knows I can't just let it go. It's a sickness I tell you! Haha.. I have to admit though that last weekend, after we got back from our cruise and our friends were staying with us since they couldn't get a flight back to CT due to the hurricane for a few days that I let it go. Our suitcases were open in our room and clothes were everywhere! I've done 3 loads of laundry since then and everything's finally back in order. But I was so exhausted those few days to care. Aside from my OCD, we have split up the household chores without ever really talking about it. We just do our own things to keep everything running smoothly. <strong>I take care of: ~Most meals, including packing our lunches for work ~Cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms ~Laundry (I also put it away, because it has to be put away a certain way) ~Making the bed and picking up things that could contribute to clutter around the house ~All the bills and monitoring of our checking and savings accounts (which is funny considering DH is an accountant) DH takes care of: ~Taking the dog out ~Taking out the garbage and recycling ~Cooking on the grill (I tried this once, and ended up burning our food to a crisp) ~All the yardwork.. mowing the lawn, taking care of the bushes, the irrigation, picking up dog poo, etc.. ) ~Sweeping and mopping the floors ~Vacuuming (including the couch due to dog fur)</strong> All of these tasks have been known to be performed by the other person, but usually this is who takes care of what.
Posted by SuMmErKuTiE[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>
</div><div>This is very similar to us! 
Except we both do cooking, packing lunches, laundry and feeding the dog. But I do all the dusting/sinks/toilets/mirrors/windows/counters/etc and he does the floors (Swiffering and vacuuming). He also does all the yard and outside stuff and the garbage. So yea, we have a similar system and it works well! He is really great about doing things around the house and we get it done when we can (although the bed hasn't been made in a few days and we haven't thoroughly cleaned in almost 2 weeks. Oops!)</div>

kipnus

My mom is a very hospitable person and also a major neat freak, so when I was a kid, we would have company over all the time and the house had to be spotless before they arrived. Now that I have my own apartment, I find that if my FI and I host a couple for dinner every weekend, I'm motivated to clean, because I also want everything to look perfect!! (Or if my parents are coming to visit, as they are tomorrow--you would not believe how clean this place is!)

m&egunton

Oh my gosh... this would so be me...

I hate cleaning and I am usually okay living in a mess... until it gets to me then I have to clean it all.  And I hate having people in the house when I do.  They only get in my way.

And if I have a relly bad kitchen that needs to be cleaned, everyone eats off paper plates until all the dishes are done!  When I was a kid, Mom would frequently walk into the kitchen and announce that she wouldn't cook dinner until the kitchen was clean. 

If things have just piled up I usually give myself a day to get everything done.  I work myself up to it all week so I wake up in the morning in a ready-to-go attitude.  I turn on the iPod as loud as it can go so the whole house is blaring with music and I just clean. 

For the laundry, once they're dry I put them in a huge pile on the couch.  And I just swap them out as I clean until they're all done.  Eventually those dishes will be done.  If you have that many dishes, you might want to think about getting rid of stuff you don't need/want anymore.

As soon as al the dishes are done then tackle the rest of the kitchen.  It's hard to get the counters clean if you've got dishes all over them!  I've noticed that it's much easier on me to do the kitchen if either the dishes are all done or if they are all in the sink.  

And once you have a clean kitchen you can start folding all the laundry.  Get a few bags for goodwill and just toss clothes into them that you don't want/need to keep anymore then just fold the ones you are keeping.  Put them into the proper rooms and give yoruself a high five for kicking butt!  I always watch a movie I've seen a bazillion times like Star Wars so I don't actually have to pay attention to what's going on and can focus on the folding.

And speaking of chores... got a house full of people coming over tomorrow and I've a messy kitchen...