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I need to vent.

You can give me advice if you want to, but I just need to vent.

My best friend is at Master's Commission in Atlanta, Georgia (http://mcatlanta.org/). (We're both from Southeastern Washington) So she's super far from home and she's in a ministry school that is kicking her spiritual butt.

She's called me every day this week in tears about things that are going on there or at home. And frankly, I'm really sick of listening to it. I can't even really reply to her because she's talking so fast and so much and changing subjects at the drop of the hat to the point where I can't even follow what she's saying. And then when she's done she'll be like, "Thanks for listening! Gotta go" and hang up.

I just got off the phone with her and I'm really worked up and frustrated. I love my friend, I don't want her life to be more difficult than it needs to be and I appreciate being there for her in whatever way she needs to me to be, but this is too much. I can't even tell her what's going on in my life, let alone talk about what's going on in hers.
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Re: I need to vent.

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    faith415faith415 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm sorry! That stinks! I know how draining it can be on you to have a friend or someone in your life like that. Has she always been this way or is it new? If it's new, hopefully it's just what she's going through and will fade away eventually. Maybe you could give her one night a week where you can talk to her and listen to her vent. That way, you're still there for her, but you don't have to feel so emotionally drained and stressed about it every day! Good luck, hopefully it gets better!
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    edited December 2011
    I'm sorry!  Maybe you could suggest to her that she e-mail you?  That way you can each get out your thoughts in one, uninterrupted block of text, and you'll be able to respond to her instead of just listening until she hangs up.
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    BMcLeodTeamBMcLeodTeam member
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    edited December 2011
    I am so sorry to hear that! It can be very stressful trying to be there for someone all the time! I agree with what sessionswedding said, getting her to email you might be the best bet, that way you can have time to really look at each individual thing she's saying and follow along with what's happening easier!
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    iamjoesgurliamjoesgurl member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sorry that you are dealing with this.  It sounds like you have been a really good friend but I'm imagining that it is really frustrating and it sounds like it is taking its toll on you.  I don't really know what to say but I'll pray for you that you are able to figure out what to do.
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_need-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:75b540fe-d562-4c7e-977c-ce60ecef673bPost:c6bad8b3-8134-48f8-bf46-3b152f130317">I need to vent.</a>:
    [QUOTE]You can give me advice if you want to, but I just need to vent. My best friend is at Master's Commission in Atlanta, Georgia ( <a href="http://mcatlanta.org/)" rel='nofollow'>http://mcatlanta.org/)</a> . (We're both from Southeastern Washington) So she's super far from home and <strong>she's in a ministry school that is kicking her spiritual butt.</strong> She's called me every day this week in tears about things that are going on there or at home. And frankly, I'm really sick of listening to it. I can't even really reply to her because she's talking so fast and so much and changing subjects at the drop of the hat to the point where I can't even follow what she's saying. And then when she's done she'll be like, "Thanks for listening! Gotta go" and hang up. I just got off the phone with her and I'm really worked up and frustrated. I love my friend, I don't want her life to be more difficult than it needs to be and I appreciate being there for her in whatever way she needs to me to be, but this is too much. I can't even tell her what's going on in my life, let alone talk about what's going on in hers.
    Posted by mrandmrsbrist[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>To be completely honest, usually when people are in seminary or ministry school they come under a lot of spiritual attack and life really honestly starts to suck. It's usually a lot more than just having things hard, it's honest to goodness spiritual attack. </div><div>
    </div><div>It still doesn't help your situation as the person she vents to, but maybe knowing that will help with more patience toward her. If it were me I'd screen her calls a little bit and know it's coming when you talk to her. </div><div>
    </div>
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    katiebakakatiebaka member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would shoot her an e-mail--or call her sometime so you're the one controlling the conversation--and explain how you feel. I hate to say it, but this is exactly how I am when I'm upset. Work has been really hard for me lately, and when I see FI after a particularly rough day, I tend to spill out every frustrating detail, very quickly, with no room for him to interject to make me feel better or, even worse, to talk about his own day. It's something that he's pointed out to me and I've been trying to work on, but I honestly didn't know I did that until he pointed it out. Maybe she doesn't realize it, either. Or at the very least, maybe she doesn't realize how frustrating that can be for you.
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