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Christian Weddings

These next two months...

I guess I should say hi first - I've been on the Knot for a while, but stayed mostly on the Ettiquite board - but I feel this board is better suited to my personal views/struggles - I don't know why I haven't been over here before!

So, HI! :-D


On to my vent:

If these next 2 months don't go quickly, I think I might just flip!  Everyone keeps saying "enjoy being engaged, the time will fly by so fast!"  but it's NOT!  I've been engaged since Jan, but it feels like YEARS!!!  I have 2 more months, and the days are C...R...A...W...L...I...N...G... by!  Maybe it's because my lease ran out, so I recently moved into "our" apartment, even though FI isn't moving down until after the wedding (and he lives 30 min north of me now). 

Almost every day we talk about eloping - not that wedding planning is stressful, it's actually going quite well - it's just that we want to be married already!


Anyone else feel like this?  Any ideas on how to make it through the next 60 days without losing my mind???  I just want it to be Aug 28th already!!!
<img src="http://image001.mywedding.com/17/097/17097334_475.jpg?1284595828g" width="170px">


TTC #1 since Feb 2012

CD3 b/w = all good!

HSG = right tube blocked, uterine obstruction, SHG = next month

DH SA = fantastic!

[url=http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3b9027]My Ovulation Chart[/url]
[img]http://www.fertilityfriend.com/ticker/3b9027/ttc.png[/img]

Re: These next two months...

  • edited December 2011
    I've known couples that eloped or were legally married and then had the wedding. The couple that eloped keep it secret and later had a wedding. My husband and I have been married for two years but are having a wedding this December on our 6 year anni. Pray on it alone and with your FI and God will direct you. I can't wait to hear what you decide!Laughing
    Be still and know... Wedding Countdown Ticker www.weddingwire.com/teamfaison
  • rbtrumpetrbtrumpet member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    haha - we never would.  I wouldn't feel right doing...married people things...if I didn't have the religious ceremony (not to mention my southern baptist dad would have a heart-attack!)
    <img src="http://image001.mywedding.com/17/097/17097334_475.jpg?1284595828g" width="170px">


    TTC #1 since Feb 2012

    CD3 b/w = all good!

    HSG = right tube blocked, uterine obstruction, SHG = next month

    DH SA = fantastic!

    [url=http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3b9027]My Ovulation Chart[/url]
    [img]http://www.fertilityfriend.com/ticker/3b9027/ttc.png[/img]
  • katanne9katanne9 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_next-two-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:f1303e7b-ea28-4621-83c2-68bc1271a13dPost:26867a9b-9b68-45e6-a6a4-8d14525950b0">Re: These next two months...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've known couples that eloped or were legally married and then had the wedding. The couple that eloped keep it secret and later had a wedding. My husband and I have been married for two years but are having a wedding this December on our 6 year anni. Pray on it alone and with your FI and God will direct you. I can't wait to hear what you decide!
    Posted by Mrs.Faison[/QUOTE]

    I think this is really rude and lying to your family and friends. Please don't ever recommend for anyone to ever do this.




    OP - I got engaged in December and am getting married in 6 weeks. You just really need to relax and enjoy this time. You'll never get to be engaged again so just enjoy the anticipation. You're the only one who can control your emotions right now.
  • fpaemp2011fpaemp2011 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_next-two-months?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:f1303e7b-ea28-4621-83c2-68bc1271a13dPost:742c6626-84d7-440a-9fd8-651008b57cc6">Re: These next two months...</a>:
    [QUOTE]haha - we never would.  I wouldn't feel right doing...married people things...if I didn't have the religious ceremony (not to mention my southern baptist dad would have a heart-attack!)
    Posted by rbtrumpet[/QUOTE]

    <div>This exactly.  The covenant before God and our families is more important to us than the piece of paper from the State that says we can file taxes together.</div>
  • edited December 2011
    I agree that it isn't very nice to get married in secret, then do it in public.  And that the marriage before God is ultimately what matters.

    But I know exactly how you feel.  I have 10 days to go, and I just want to be  married already.  It was hard for me to enjoy the planning, etc, because it got to feeling like one decision after another.   I think the whole "enjoy being engaged" thing is easier when you are engaged for a long time and you have periods where the wedding planning has slowed down.  If it weren't for the big party, I wish my fiance and I could have gotten married a week after we were engaged!
    image
  • edited December 2011
    katanne9
    I was only telling her of what I have seen and experienced. If you read further I told her to pray on it and let God lead her which was the advice I gave. There are some couples who prefer to have an intimate ceremony and then later host a celebration for their families to be a part of their Union. The couple that eloped I do not know personally but it's their right to tell who they want about whatever they want. My Husband and I never lied to anyone about being married and our families were invited to our ceremony having the matriarchs of both present. We are faithful members of our church and marriage ministry. In fact, I'm sure if there was something horribly, sinfully wrong with how we decided to join our lives two  years ago then our marriage Minister would let us know and not agree to travel 3 hours and officiate our wedding. It iwas simply the best decision for my situation and I would not ever tell anyone what to do but it worked for me.

    With that said, of course God is what ultimately matters however God is not confined to a building with a steeple or even a Pastor as is evident in Matthew 18:20 which states "For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." Our lives have been tremendously blessed following our marriage in ways that only God can do. A marriage is not based on how many religious rituals you can fit into one day. It's based on your level of committment to God's word and  the Union He destined for you.

    If I have offended anyone you can message me however that was not my intention.

    Have a blessed day!Laughing





    Be still and know... Wedding Countdown Ticker www.weddingwire.com/teamfaison
  • edited December 2011
    Eloping in secret and then acting like you're not married is a violation of the ninth commandment. God won't ever lead anyone to do such a thing.

    A wedding in front of a justice of the peace or whatnot is just as much a valid ceremony as a ceremony in a church presided over by a pastor. Marriage is not a sacrament; there are no special blessings to be had by being married in such a way. So if someone chooses to do that, they haven't lost anything. The covenant is made as much before God if presided over by a judge or a pastor. It's a common grace ordinance; it's universal. The marriages of believers are as valid as those of unbelievers.

    That said, it is a good idea for Christians to have a ceremony in front of friends and family - and if it includes unbelieving friends and family, so much the better! It's the perfect opportunity to share the gospel with people, to give them a picture of the way in which Christ loved the Church. And it's a blessing to a couple to have their friends and family witness their vows, because those are the same people who will be helping them through their marriage as they continue. We're called to live in the Church, not as individuals. Nonetheless, such a ceremony is still basically a civil ceremony with Christian elements in it.

    We've been engaged since the end of January and have had periods where the time has gone by faster or slower - the busier we are, the faster the time goes by! We're down to 52 days now, though - yay! Being engaged is generally a frustrating stage. You're starting to merge your lives and you generally don't function quite as much like singles anymore - decisions are, more often than not, made together to a far greater degree than when you were dating. At the same time, though, you don't get to enjoy the benefits of marriage! In other words, engagement is basically a limbo period of sorts, and, thus, should really be as short as possible (three months definitely recommended) -- at six months, ours is waaaayy too long! Basically, the opinion in our circles is that an engagement should only be as long as you need to finish pre-marital counselling and plan a wedding, and you can do that in three months.

    We basically entered our dating relationship (in October) with the idea that we'd very likely get married and have been anticipating it since then. Well, we're done with the anticipating and just want to get to it now! So I totally sympathise with you. Basically, the best way to get through it is to keep busy, distract yourself. That helps _a lot_.
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  • kkidd28kkidd28 member
    Ninth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I know exactly what you mean.  My wedding is in 2 months and a week and a week and yes - I'm ready!  If my family hadn't already purchased plane tickets and dresses we joke we would just let Elvis marry us - lol!  But of course, that's not what we really want.  It helped this weekend to have a wedding free weekend with just he and I hanging out for my birthday!  It really relaxed us to get away from it all! Hope that helps!
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  • edited December 2011
    rbtrumpet, I'm a fellow August bride and I understand where you are coming from.  The only advice I can give is to keep on trucking and know that it will be here so quickly.  The days do creep by, but remember, lots of girls have had to wait much longer than you or me (We got engaged in December) for the day to finally arrive.  We are relatively lucky to have such short engagements.

    If you don't already, come over to the August 2010 club board.  The girls are awesome over there are very supportive of one another.  And it really does pass the time to be able to converse with other August Knotties!
  • edited December 2011
    I know what you mean. My HH and I got engaged May 7 last year and married May 22 this year. I think last year was one of the longest years of my life. Everyone told me, like you, to "enjoy this time" and that I'd never have this time again, but honestly I am SO glad that time is over. Being married is ten zillion times better. I know waiting sucks, but you'll get through it. One thing you should enjoy now: your relationship with your girl friends. That really does change. It's not a bad change. It's just different. So enjoy that facet of your life as much as you can right now. Just so you know, you're not the only one who talks about eloping. Almost everyday my FI would say "I hate not being married. Want to go to city hall?" And I'd say "How bout Saturday?" You're really not alone. :)
    Anniversary
  • JCM10JCM10 member
    Third Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I WISH my wedding was that close! We have been engaged since Feb. but are having an almost 2 year engagement. I can't believe I'm almost 1/4 of the way through that, it's gone so fast! (And I've done nothing wedding related...except look! And have way too many religion fights. So maybe after I start jumping into planning, I'll feel the same) Congrats!
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