Is something wrong with me?

lcabarei

Here's the situation:  My plan is to have a destination wedding at the beach (about 4 hours away from where I live).  It was brouhgt to my intention that this was inconsiderate to the elderly in my family, and the family member with an exceptional amount of children (my future SIL has 7) who may want to attend the wedding.  Is it wrong for me to feel a little miffed, or say in the back of my mind "That's not my problem".

lcabarei

FYI, my wedding isn't until Sept of next year

mrsconn23

Well, here's the way I look at this...If you want those people at your wedding, then it IS your problem if it is inconvenient to them. 

If you want to have a destination wedding, you will have to accept that people may decline because they don't want to travel that far and/or put out the expense.

Are these people telling you this directly or is someone else speaking for them?

It's "brought to my attention", not 'intention'.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_is-something-wrong-with-me?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:0d989a59-d460-475c-8200-5a95e7c68efcPost:7178ec65-606b-4a98-9d74-a25847b390ee">Is something wrong with me?</a>:
[QUOTE]Here's the situation:  My plan is to have a destination wedding at the beach (about 4 hours away from where I live).  It was brouhgt to my intention that this was inconsiderate to the elderly in my family, and the family member with an exceptional amount of children (my future SIL has 7) who may want to attend the wedding.  Is it wrong for me to feel a little miffed, or say in the back of my mind "That's not my problem".
Posted by lcabarei[/QUOTE]

Suppose you do have your DW; are you planning to invite kids?

VarunaTT

I can see the point about the elderly.  The beach can be a difficult walking surface for the elderly.  I assume that you want these "elderly" there, so I'd discuss what you're doing, if anything, to make it easier.

I don't think there's anything you can do to make it convenient for a person with 7 children.  That's their problem.

So, I get being miffed and thinking it's not really your bag, but it kinda is for the walking situation.

Heffalump

If you don't care whether they attend, then no, it's not your problem.  Otherwise, you have some thinking to do.

lcabarei

It's more like one person speaking for them, and I feel like it's more about my FSIL  I started out by talking to my grandmother first.  She said,"Baby, I'll probably beat you there."  I've also received responses from other relatives on both sides over the age of 60. 

VarunaTT

Well, lots of nosy people will give you their opinion about everything and anything at your wedding.  If your "elderly" people are fine with it, I'd disregard the comments.  And seriously, I don't know how you could make anything convenient for someone with 7 kids.  Getting into the car at all is probably a production.  If they're going to be at teh wedding, I'd encourage having a kids table to help keep them entertained, but beyond that those kids are her responsibility, not yours.

6fsn

Nothing is going to be convenient for the woman with 7 kids.  I assume this is your FI's sister?  Talk to him and decide how important it is for her to be there. 

As for the "elderly" (over 80 might qualify, but 60 not so much) I can see where 8 hrs roundtrip and a jaunt to the beach could be a daunting task.

*Barbie*

considering the Duggars manage to drag their kids all over the country, I think your fSIL can drag her kids to the beach if she wants to (and can afford to ) be there.

If you and your FI are going to be ok with people declining to make the trip, then go for it.

Cortney1982

I think the only problem here is the woman with 7 kids wondering how she is going to keep all of them from wandering around and getting into the water.