::Taw et al.::

fishgirl77

I don't mind filling you guys in on the counterclaim, but I may want to DD the post.  I'm paranoid about being found on the internet.  I'll post if a potential deletion is OK.

Cant_wait!

I DD personal stuff all the time... I just wait a few hours and never bring it up again

Wonderw1fe

That kind of stuff gets a DD pass.

6fsn

Yep, that's an allowable DD.

tawillers

It's understandable.  I do it, too. BUT you don't have to tell if you don't want to.

mrsconn23

::hands Fishgirl her DD hall pass::  DDing is totally understandable in these cases.

zsazsa-stl

Yikes!  How old is SD?

mrsconn23

Um, wow.  That's just disturbing, the second one.  The first one, she's just being a btch because she can. I asked in the other post but I'll ask here, has your DH's lawyer mentioned anything about parental alienation?  Also, if she's putting this in her counterclaim, WTF could she be saying/doing to SD?  That worries me...A LOT.  What a psycho.

MinM

Nothing that occurs in mediation is official until a judge deems it so...that being said, I'd skip it all together. Your going to end up in a small room in the court house with some kid who doesn't know jack from squat trying to assist you and this jackamo ex-wife in reaching some middle ground. Do you think that will really happen? Really? Since you'll be at the court house anyways, might as well see someone who can actually make a decision. That is just my opintion. And I am not a lawyer or a vendor.

fishgirl77

Unfortunately, the lawyer is in court all week (we have a serious lawyer shortage around here), so they're setting up a meeting for next week.  He was only able to talk to the paralegal today.  They were not surprised to see the implications in the counter, because they've seen them many times before.SD is 11 and if I thought for a moment anything like that was true, H would be on the street so fast he wouldn't know what day it was.

PMeg819

How does SD feel about this all? I hate to think what sort of nonsense your DH's ex is spewing, and if she'll be resentful if the custody agreement changes.

tawillers

I'm sorry this is getting so ugly.  H and I went through a custody hearing for his son earlier this year.  Our situation was very different, but it did get ugly and it was very stressful, so I know how you feel.Just keep/provide documentation of everything.  Every time your H has tried to contact SD, documentation of the purchase of the cell phone, etc.  Even small details.Keep us updated on everything.

MinM

Ditto what Taw said. No one will advocate for you like you! Protect yourselves for DD's sake.

6fsn

I'm so sorry you all are going through this.

fishgirl77

Some time ago I started making H e-mail all the major stuff that needed to communicated and saving everything he sent.  I do this at work for documentation purposes and I think issues involving SD are more important than work and should be documented accordingly.  The response also has supporting documentation of what her mother was told.  Some things the lawyer already has. At this point, I'm encouraging H to attend the mediation out of good faith towards the process.  I really doubt at this point that she'll come.  But I think it's important to show we're willing, even if she isn't.

6fsn

Excellent call on saving e-mails and using written word.  FWIW I also think you are right to go to the mediation as well.

mrsconn23

I agree about going to mediation too.  Just because she's been blowing off the courts, does not mean that your DH should too.  Showing good faith goes a long way from what I've heard about most custody cases, especially since she's not showing any at all.