At this point, my dad was in the bathroom, so he missed the first part of this. Poor, put-upon MIL harrumped into chair in the kitchen. She heaved a great put-upon sigh and said [imagine in a singsongy, annoying, whiney voice], "I hope I didn't offend you before, but really, you and DH need to learn to be more open to letting others help, and maybe getting your attitude right about it. I don't have a lot of money, this is the only way I know how to help,[here's where I tuned her out] blah blah, I've sacrificed, yakkity schmakkity where's my award from Mother of the Year, blah blah, I know best."
By now my dad had come out of the bathroom and was looking perplexed as hell. She saw him and said, "I was just telling your daughter about how important it is for them to be open to letting people do what they do..."
At this, I cut her off. I. Was. Done.
"You know what. We don't have to let you do anything. If you really wanted to help, you would help in the ways we need you to help, not just doing whatever you want to do when you want to do it. You're only making things worse. So how about this: you just stand by until we ask you for something, and then ONLY DO THAT ONE THING! So while I appreciate you coming today, please go. I don't need your kind of help."
My dad was all toothy smile and raised eyebrows. She looked at him like "traitor" and said, "Ok, well fine! I guess I'll go, then!"
Dad: "Do you need help with your stuff? Can I get the door for you? It was nice to see you again."
Her: [angry huff as she stalked out the door with her stuff]
Dad: Have a good one!
She got in her car and sat there for 15 minutes. My dad asked me WTF she was doing. I said she was waiting for me to come running after her, apologizing and offering to let her move in for good. My dad was like, "Who does that?" I told him only crazy people. Eventually she got the hint that I wasn't going to chase her, and she left.
So, I put the btch out. There is an epilogue to this story, but that's essentially it. She hasn't called or come over since.
..