Let me start by saying that I am usually not the type of person who absolutely has to be the center of attention at all times, but I feel if there was ever a day to make an exception to this, it should be my wedding day.
Both my fiance and I worked hard to pay for the entire wedding ourselves, and put so much time and effort into planning everything and making sure the day goes as smoothly as can be so we can truly enjoy what is to be a celebration of a very special moment in our lives together. I'm sure not everything will go as planned, which I've mentally prepared myself for, but I am hoping overall anything that does happen will be minor.
So imagine my surprise that his brother decided to get engaged yesterday - 20 days before our wedding. I'm very happy for him and think this is long overdue, however, based on certain past experiences with his brother, I can't help but wonder his motivation for popping the question so close to our wedding. Rather than go into detail about those past experiences, let's just say that I don't think it is a coincidence that he timed his proposal so close. I also think part of the reason for his timing is out of jealousy of all the attention we (maingly his brother) have been getting, but hey - that's life - that's how it goes when you are having a major life event - you get lots of attention (and lots of gray hair with it).
My biggest concern is that he (or my fmil) will try to turn our wedding into some pseudo engagement party - and I am trying to figure out the best way possible to handle this without offending anyone. The fact that my fmil, on more than one ocassion prior to my fbil's engagement, has insisted that we 'honor' my fbil in some way at the wedding is enough for me to think that this is what could happen. And I've had to remind everyone repeatedly that this is OUR day - NOT theirs or anyone else's. Call me selfish, but we're paying for everything ourselves and I still feel we've bent over backwards to keep everyone happy, but this is something I cannot (nor will not) compromise on.
Has anyone else here had to deal with this type of sitation and if so, how did you handle it? Any advice on the best way to deal with this without ticking off too many people would be much appreciated......
I have already spoken with my fiance about this too and his initial reaction was do I have any 'evidence'. But then when he stopped and really thought about it, he is in agreement with me that this is OUR day and we should keep it as such, but he too, is at a loss as to the best way of handling this.....