Open Letter Tuesday

mgoss228

Happy Mardi Gras everyone!

And ......... GO!

mgoss228

Dear Father,
I would like to know one way or the other if you are going to attend the wedding, so that I can "mentally" prepare for having to deal with you in case you decide to act like a douche that day.  Please RSVP sooner, rather than later.  There is a stamp already on the RSVP envelope, and you have a freaking P.O. Box, so getting to the Post Office shouldn't be difficult.
Thanks,
Estranged Daughter

Dear Marriage Licence,
Please get yourself all ready, we're at the 60 day mark TODAY, and although we only need to get you at a minimum of 3 days before the wedding, I would rather just have you and get that check done.  I guess FI and I will need to get over to one of the agencies in the next month.
Yours Truly,
Busy Bride

Dear Apartment,
Clean yourself, that would be super.
Sincerely,
Busy Tenant

Sharingourlove

Dear Management Team,
It would be so nice if you would actually do what you say you will do, and move forward with the bosses agenda.  You leaving me hanging for over a month knowing part of my job is to have a new focus, but not telling my supervisor who then tells me not to do it.  That is frustrating, and quite frankly a waste of my time and talent so don't be surprised when someone who values me offers me a job and I take it. 

Sincerely,
A frustrated, undervalued and disrespected employee

Dear Brain and Body
I realize you've been under a lot of stress lately with all the work stuff, and heath issues, but would you please start to feel better?  Life really is good whether you feel it or not and it's time to let me get physical again so I can lose at least a little bit of weight before the wedding...or at least get toned so I look and feel better.

Thank you,
A stressed out soul

abrieckinthewall

Dear Wedding Date,
I know you are so far away. but could you please find a way to be closer? 850 days is a long way away, maybe you could just speed up time? I have a lot of planning, and even more time. I know we could use the time to save, and the FI doesn't want to get married while his father isn't talking to him, so maybe you could just magically solve those problems? You know they say "time heals all"
Thanks,
a very impatient bride

which brings me to

Dear FFIL,
Please talk to your son. I just wrote a nasty letter, but I erased it out of respect. Although at this point I am not sure if you deserve it. You have been giving him the silent treatment for MONTHS becuase he "raised his voice" when you tore him a new one because he didn't consult you when your daughter asked him what kind of notebook to buy --with her money. I know there is cultural customes, but that just sounds insane. On top of that, you have your son very depressed, which has me upset --because I don't like to see my dear FI hurt. And on top of it, he doesn't want to get married until you are willing to talk to him, because he wants to tell you before hand. So I am stuck waiting, because you want to act like a child.
--A very disappointment FDIL

EMTmommy

Dear cake in my fridge,

You aren't supposed to be here. I expected you to be eaten up at that bbq a few days ago. You are a nuisance; calling my name late at night, saying things like "Just have a small piece," and "CREAM CHEESE FILLING." The frugal part of me can't bear to just throw you away; so just disappear into someone else's stomach, and ruin their calorie counting. 

Sincerely,

Your ex-friend, Thunder Thighs

Dear Mom,

Don't call me or answer the phone if you're under the influence, and won't be able to remember what we conversed about. 

Love,

Tired of Repeating Myself

sofiabrian

Dear Time,

Where have you gone?? I have a lot to do, and there is never enough of you. My list of things continues to grow and grow. Now back to writing this paper.

Love,

Kinda Busy All the Time

fancynewbecca

Dear Married Life,

So far, you're awesome )

Sincerely,
Not Stressed Anymore