Attire Q for "Cocktail Attire" request for a Long Island, NY Wedding

mgoss228

FI and I are going to his cousin's wedding this weekend.  It will be an outdoor ceremony in Long Island, NY at 6:00 pm.  It is supposed to be in the 80's all weekend long.  On the invite, "cocktail attire" is requested.

I know what I'm going to wear (a strapless black/tan lace cocktail dress).

But I don't totally know what FI should wear, since it will be so hot.

I was originally thinking of a dark, long-sleeved, button-up shirt with black pants.
But would a short-sleeved button-up be okay?  It is just going to be so freaking hot, and FI and I aren't used to the heat.

It would fly in WA, but I'm not sure about NY.

Thanks!

Tygirljojo

Honestly, since it's the East Coast, I would have him wear a jacket.  They tend to be more formal over there, plus do you know if the wedding is outside or inside?  My guess would be inside for a wedding requiring cocktail attire, but that's just me.  If you have any doubts, post on their local board would be my suggestion.

dreamwinds

For guys, cocktail attire typically means dark suits for guys.

Short-sleeved would be closer to casual dressy than cocktail.

I'd err on the side of more formal since it's Long Island.

MacPanda

We just got back from a New York wedding and it was hot!  FI wore a light colored long sleeve shirt with black pants and a fitted black vest (no jacket but the vest steps it up a bit).  The shirt was one where you could roll the sleeves up and button them up if you wanted.  He did that later on in the reception.  I wouldn't go for the short sleeve right off the bat but rolling them up later was perfectly acceptable.  

Have fun and drink lots of water! :-) 

mgoss228

Ick, FI doesn't own a suit.  I guess I'll just tell him the l/s shirt will have to do.

The bride is from Colorado, and the groom is from Pennsylvania... if that makes any difference. 

I think the ceremony is supposed to be outdoors, and I'm assuming we would go inside (hopefully air-conditioned) to eat/dance/etc.

The wedding is at a winery, but the invites weren't THAT formal looking... so I was hoping for FI's sake that he could go a little less formal.

Thank you all for your advice.  I've lived in WA my whole life and have never been to the East Coast, and I'm kinda intimidated...

niq24601

Does he own a jacket? A jacket and khakis is probably okay.

emyinpink

I definitely wouldn't have him wear a short sleeved shirt (especially for cocktail attire, and even more especially on Long Island). I would do his normal dark suit, and then he can roll up his sleeves and take off the jacket if he gets super hot.

mgoss228

Yeah, I spoke with FI during my lunch.  He refuses to wear a jacket, because we know that at least the ceremony will be outdoors.  It's his family, so be it!

I facebook messaged FSIL, because she is the MOH in the wedding.  I haven't heard back yet, but I'm hoping that maybe she somehow reinforces my belief that it can't possibly be THAT formal.  The invite said "Cocktail Attire," but it just wasn't packaged all that formally imo.

Honestly, I have a hard enough time getting FI to wear nice shoes  to weddings (he wears sneakers to formal events ::::hiding head in shame::::).  I should be happy that at least he agreed to wear his "fancy, shiny shoes" and a tie with his l/s shirt.