• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Wedding Woes

Wedding Trashers!

My soon to be family-in-law has a 30+ year tradition of trashing the bride and groom on their wedding night.  It can happen in a variety of ways, like trashing the hotel room (having a kegger in the honeymoon suite and filling the hot tub up with drunk cousins, tossing flour and oatmeal into the bed, changing the lights to black lights)... and if they can't break into the room, they trash your home (flipping furniture, changing out the spice rack with other substances, etc)... and if not the home, your car (tire slashing, filling the car up with sand so you can't drive it, etc). If they are unsuccessful at these attempts, they've stolen the bride, dropped her off at an unknown location and left her there to try to call for help to get back to the reception. These aren't your ordinary family practical jokes.. it can result in costly damages to the hotel room, lost time on the wedding day and leave a bad impression with the bride's side of the family.

At the shower that was thrown for me this weekend, the family threaten to do something to the new house that we just purchased. While I have a great sense of humor, to hear that my fathers luxury car might be damaged or that our new home might be broken in to and trashed leaves me feeling very distant from feeling welcomed into the family. Has anyone else dealt with this behavior? How can I keep from stressing out about it? I am surprised that even the women of the family are into this, saying that 'they knew where I lived'... ugh!

Re: Wedding Trashers!

  • baconsmombaconsmom member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_wedding-trashers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:83f03012-73b0-4bd1-a47c-649de74529f6Post:edd8c475-0e20-4cc0-af23-1b46a1446e05">Wedding Trashers!</a>:
    [QUOTE]My soon to be family-in-law has a 30+ year tradition of trashing the bride and groom on their wedding night.  It can happen in a variety of ways, like trashing the hotel room (having a kegger in the honeymoon suite and filling the hot tub up with drunk cousins, tossing flour and oatmeal into the bed, changing the lights to black lights)... and if they can't break into the room, they trash your home (flipping furniture, changing out the spice rack with other substances, etc)... and if not the home, your car (tire slashing, filling the car up with sand so you can't drive it, etc). If they are unsuccessful at these attempts, they've stolen the bride, dropped her off at an unknown location and left her there to try to call for help to get back to the reception. These aren't your ordinary family practical jokes.. it can result in costly damages to the hotel room, lost time on the wedding day and leave a bad impression with the bride's side of the family. At the shower that was thrown for me this weekend, the family threaten to do something to the new house that we just purchased. While I have a great sense of humor, to hear that my fathers luxury car might be damaged or that our new home might be broken in to and trashed leaves me feeling very distant from feeling welcomed into the family. Has anyone else dealt with this behavior? How can I keep from stressing out about it? I am surprised that even the women of the family are into this, saying that 'they knew where I lived'... ugh!
    Posted by lauralou42[/QUOTE]

    <div>Tell them you'll call the police for breaking and entering and vandalism, or, if they take you, for kidnapping and unlawful imprisonment. Then follow through. These are criminal acts, perpetrated by criminals, so treat them as such. </div>
    image
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_wedding-trashers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:83f03012-73b0-4bd1-a47c-649de74529f6Post:edd8c475-0e20-4cc0-af23-1b46a1446e05">Wedding Trashers!</a>:
    [QUOTE]My soon to be family-in-law has a 30+ year tradition of trashing the bride and groom on their wedding night.  It can happen in a variety of ways, like trashing the hotel room (having a kegger in the honeymoon suite and filling the hot tub up with drunk cousins, tossing flour and oatmeal into the bed, changing the lights to black lights)... and if they can't break into the room, they trash your home (flipping furniture, changing out the spice rack with other substances, etc)... and if not the home, your car (tire slashing, filling the car up with sand so you can't drive it, etc). If they are unsuccessful at these attempts, they've stolen the bride, dropped her off at an unknown location and left her there to try to call for help to get back to the reception. These aren't your ordinary family practical jokes.. it can result in costly damages to the hotel room, lost time on the wedding day and leave a bad impression with the bride's side of the family. At the shower that was thrown for me this weekend, the family threaten to do something to the new house that we just purchased. While I have a great sense of humor, to hear that my fathers luxury car might be damaged or that our new home might be broken in to and trashed leaves me feeling very distant from feeling welcomed into the family. Has anyone else dealt with this behavior? How can I keep from stressing out about it? I am surprised that even the women of the family are into this, saying that 'they knew where I lived'... ugh!
    Posted by lauralou42[/QUOTE]

    Uh. No. If FI's family threatened to destroy our things it would be a deal breaker. Any chance they're just yanking your chain?
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Uhm not cool. How is this acceptable?

    Your FI's family allows drunken hooligans do crazy stuff to their property? That's not funny. It's criminal.

    I'd tell them exactly what Bmom said. There will be charges pressed.
    image
  • LnR70707LnR70707 member
    Tenth Anniversary 2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Holy crap.  What does your FI say about all this?  I'd seriously threaten to press charges if they do any of that...or re-think marrying into that family at all.  You will be associated with these people for the rest of your life unless you move far away
    br>imageimage
    IF/Baby Blog
    2 years, 2 surgeries, 2 clomid fails, 2 IUIs, 1 loss, IVF #1 - 10/25/10 = BFP!
    TTC #2 - 6/12 surgery #3, FET #1 & 1.2 = BFN, 12/2012 FET #2 = BFP!
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickersLilypie First Birthday tickers


    I can't wait for the "im getting a divorce" post in 5 years or so because your husbands were fed up with your disgusting chair asses from playing on the knot all day and getting fired 4-5 times for not doing any work. you guys are all winners!! ~ Laur929
  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    you are marrying into real class.  please also consider -- your fi has also participated in this nonsense/criminal behaviour.
    image
  • edited December 2011
    Do all of your FI's family members look like this?




    image
  • edited December 2011
    There is no way in Hades I would marry into this family. This sounds like the beginning of "The Hills Have Eyes" or "Texas Chainsaw Massacre".
    ..
  • HeffalumpHeffalump member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_wedding-trashers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:83f03012-73b0-4bd1-a47c-649de74529f6Post:edd8c475-0e20-4cc0-af23-1b46a1446e05">Wedding Trashers!</a>:
    [QUOTE]While I have a great sense of humor, <strong>to hear that my fathers luxury car might be damaged </strong>or that our new home might be broken in to and trashed leaves me feeling very distant from feeling welcomed into the family.
    Posted by lauralou42[/QUOTE]

    But it's okay to damage a non-luxury car?  This detail is confusing.

    Oh, and yeah, his family is nuts.  What do they do when someone has a kid, steal it from the hospital nursery and ransom it for cash?  I would stay far, far away from these people.  Permanently.
  • edited December 2011
    Wow. Ditto Bmom.

    Also, don't let anyone in that family have a key to ANYTHING. Also, let the front desk of the whatever hotel you're staying at know that NO ONE is to have access to your room.
    MIL is thrilled you're joining the family. Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • edited December 2011
    I would explain to them that while these hijinks were maybe acceptable when they were younger, they will NOT be tolerated at your wedding, and that if they do commit these acts, then they should expect to be placed in handcuffs (not the fun, fuzzy kind either) and promptly shipped off to the drunk tank.

    I've never heard of this sort of thing happening, but you can guaran-friggin'-tee that if my FI's family had done this sort of thing in the past, I'd seriously reconsider associating myself with them.
    25 in 2012 Reading Progress: 11/25 (44% toward goal)
    my currently-reading shelf:
    Mehgan's book recommendations, favorite quotes, book clubs, book trivia, book lists (currently-reading shelf)
    Photobucket
    "Are you one of those vegetarian zombies that only eats grrrrrraaaaaaiiiinnnnnsssss?" -- raynes
    **FOR SALE NOW**
  • lauralou42lauralou42 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thank you everyone. I really appreciate knowing that I'm not over reacting about this. I'm definitely following through with police swinging by our place and my personal attendant helping me not get stolen during the reception. Fun traditions have obviously gotten out of hand here and they've lost sight of what is appropriate.. They are really a fun group of people and I'm super excited to join the family... it's just an inappropriate initiation that I do not want to be a part of.

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards