No Support

mrsalbee

My mother has shown absolutely no interest in my wedding.  My sister, MOH, has negative things to say about everything.  One of my bridesmaids just got married in April and she is being very selfish.  She won't share any information on the shortcuts she used for her wedding and reception.  My fiance and I are going to be paying for everything ourselves and we could really use that information to help save us some money.  She had tons of help and she didn't even really need the financial help. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother?! Someone please help me figure out what to do or say to these people. Or is it just something I am needing to change?

MrsMyrtle

Ignore them. And surely there are other ways of finding out these "shortcuts" than trying to get your friend to tell you.

lna234

Not very nice of them, that's for sure, but there's not much you can do to change their attitude, you'll probably just make it worse. Some things I've done to cut costs at our wedding:
-I bought silk flowers from a lady who used to have a wedding business for $150 and used them to make all of my centerpieces and bridal party bouquets.
-I found a new photography company who is charging me only for prints, not a service fee. Photography gets very expensive...watch for ads for newly graduated photography students looking to build their portfolio, just make sure to see some of their work first. We got ours to do an engagement photo session and the pics turned out great!
-I bought a clearance floor model dress, it is a champagne colored Romona Keveza that was originally $3900, I got it for $1500. They were originally selling it for half price ($1950) but I asked for a better deal and got it reduced even more.
-I bought most of my decor used from Kijiji, an online classifieds site. You'll save at least half or retial price for good stuff that's only been used once and lots in great condition.

Hope this helps you!

JadziaDax

Hi. Sorry you are not feeling supported. I wanted to start off by saying: do not spend too much time worrying about the financial help others have received with their wedding. You said your friend got help but didn't really need it- don't worry too much about your friends financial situation. You don't want to lose a friend over feeling resentment (I'm paying for my own wedding as well and i'm trying not to compare myself to others).
Maybe your mother and sister aren't too excited about your wedding because it is far off, I noticed your profile says August 2011. Once the wedding draws closer, they may show more interest. Your friend may also have a lot going on in her life that she might feel uncomfortable sharing with you since you are experiencing a happy time in your life and she may not want to speak about her problems.
To make a long story short, I would wait a little while. Spend some time on the knot- especially on your local board- and do your research here. You will find out a lot of information about saving money and quality vendors from the other posters.
And to answer your question, I think you just need to change your attitude a little- be patient, positive and do your own research. I hope everything works out.

redheadfsu

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_support?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:9fc4ded4-c93b-496f-a58a-bffe3270b1f9Post:b3d0137c-72fe-455c-9ea6-8abcf9ad3c62">Re: No Support</a>:
[QUOTE]Ignore them. And surely there are other ways of finding out these "shortcuts" than trying to get your friend to tell you.
Posted by MrsMyrtle[/QUOTE]
This.

Sorry your family isn't supportive, that stinks. But your friend or anyone else shouldn't have to plan or provide shortcuts for your wedding. Sorry, but it is your wedding, so start researching/planning yourself.

LD1970

It sucks that your family & friends aren't more helpful, but that's what the knot is for.  Go to your local board & ask for help with local resources.  Go to your club board and get an idea of a timeline.  And go to the wedding recap board and look at former brides' postings because many put their budgets and how they did things to help people just like you.

mrsalbee

Yeah, I don't expect her to plan anything for me at all.  I guess I was just disappointed because we have been best friends for 10 years! I saw all of these images in my head of us spending the afternoon pouring over magazines and talking about ways to plan my wedding. Especially since she just had hers.  I guess I just feel let down by her.  I was jealous that she had tons of help for her wedding, and I have since gotten over that.  I am doing things little by little on my own and letting go of all the negative things that bothered me.