How to mend things with future sister in law

secretbride1988

I became engaged and set a date 4 months from my engagement...i know quick right?  I wanted a summer wedding and idk can't really justify it but hey my finace and I decided on it together.
Future sister in law is FURIOUS!  She had a vacation planned (it was due to end the day of our wedding) and yeah she flipped.  My finace is not close with her...she is MUCH older then us so he doesn't care too much.
Well we stuck with the date. She has yet to speak to either of us and is coming this weekend to see her adult son (she lives out of state).  So this is a big deal!
I've always respected her and never had a problem before but now the tension could be cut with a knife...WHAT DO I DO to make the most of her visit?

DG1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_mend-things-future-sister-law?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:ab31d09f-fd6d-4bc5-a645-7278f5d651ebPost:d212f92f-f5f7-4683-a7ac-d791c169b158">How to mend things with future sister in law</a>:
[QUOTE]I became engaged and set a date 4 months from my engagement...i know quick right?  I wanted a summer wedding and idk can't really justify it but hey my finace and I decided on it together. Future sister in law is FURIOUS!  She had a vacation planned (it was due to end the day of our wedding) and yeah she flipped.  My finace is not close with her...she is MUCH older then us so he doesn't care too much. Well we stuck with the date. She has yet to speak to either of us and is coming this weekend to see her adult son (she lives out of state).  So this is a big deal! I've always respected her and never had a problem before but now the tension could be cut with a knife...WHAT DO I DO to make the most of her visit?
Posted by secretbride1988[/QUOTE]

At least apologize to her for the inconvenience?  Explain why it was you HAD to have it that weekend instead of a week later?  Don't grovel, but do acknowledge your failure to consider her schedule or feelings in the matter.

What does your FI have to say about it?

secretbride1988

He says its not a big deal and chances are she doesn't care anymore and has just accepted it.
weddings really bring out the true personalities of people... its a very hard time for me...so happy the knot is here to help

pjsparkle03

Just remember your wedding is only one day, but the relationship with her is forever. Regardless if your hubby to be in close to her or not. I'd explain to her why you all landed on that weekend.

secretbride1988

wellll! 
she came...she ignored me....she asked my fiance about wedding stuff and acted like I wasn't there.  It was BAD!  the silence was worse then what she could have said.
So now I don't know what to do...I don't want friction...and in the future I don't want my kids to not know their aunt.
She owes me an apology.  I'd also like to point out that my finace picked out the wedding date not me...but she's blaming me calling me inconsiderate and such.  Its idk awful

TheDuckis

I thought her son was going to visit her the weekend of your wedding, and your FI's parents were the ones scheduled to go on vacation. You've just had so many issues with this wedding you can't keep them straight, huh? How's your tooth?

secretbride1988

her son is visiting her and they are going on vacation... future inlaws are also taking a vacation seperately...but in laws vaca has been canceled
my tooth? don't remember talking about my tooth...but its fine doc says its wedding nerves! ha crazy he says if the pain continues it will have to come out

and yes i've had all sorts of random issues... had a great weekend got a lot done for the wedding...booked the most wonderful woman to do our pics and she is truly brining the extra fun touch (free photo booth like area) we needed...this has been over all fun experiance but not without some hang ups