Also from the wedding.
We went to a little podunk bar after the reception. H kindly agreed to DD for my sister and me, but I think by the end of the night he was not very pleased with his decision. I think I held it together okay until we got back to the hotel, but my sis was a hot mess.
So we get in the car. Sis is in the back, and was taking her sweet time putting on her seatbelt. She and I were talking really loudly about something, and H just wanted to get the hell home. So he tore off, and took the turn out of the parking lot more sharply than necessary. Sis's balance wasn't the best, so she toppled over and hit her face on the door handle.
The rest of the trip back, there was this incessant little high-pitched whine coming from the back seat. "I have a black eye. That really hurt. Jesse gave me a black eye. Now I have a black eye. I left my phone at the bar and I have a black eye."
When I informed her that she did not leave her phone at the bar and that she was, in fact, holding it, she said "I don't care. I have a black eye."
Her face did not have a mark on it.
The next morning, she looks perfectly fine. First thing she says to me is, "I really do have a black eye!" Then all day she claimed it was getting worse.
The following is an excerpt from her facebook status and comments on Sunday evening.
Sis - Black eye? Sounds like a successful wedding to me.
Me - YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A BLACK EYE.
Sis - I HAVE A BLACK EYE MINUS THE BLACK.
Me - So you have an eye.
Sis - It is bruised though. It's just clear instead of black and blue.
She then continued to post updates about how it keeps getting worse. I've just rolled my eyes and SMH.
Today, she posted a picture. Damn if she doesn't actually have a black eye.
ETA - deleted the pic.