Lazy husband = no thank you's written

spartybride3

We've been married for just over a month & my husband has written SIX thank you's & he did it on Sunday. I've written 50 & I did that 2 weeks ago. We only had about 75 thank you's total. 

I don't know why he's being so task avoidant. He knows he needs to do them & he keeps saying he will but he doesn't. He did the same thing with our shower thank you's. He only had to write about 20 of those & I wrote close to 90 (we had a lot of showers...I work in a school district & over 65 went to them alone). All mine were done in about 2 weeks & he sent his out over a month later. 

I'm really getting ticked at him & I know he's just getting annoyed with me nagging him, but he's being rude. Some of these people were very generous to us & these need to get out. I know I could just do them my self, but I'm sick of it. He avoids stuff all the time. 

What else can I say to him??? Please tell me I'm not alone in the lazy husband department!!

FLANYTATOOGURL

Why not just do them yourself?

redheadtmk

My husband is the same way!!! He is convinced there is a year window in which to send them out and therefore we are in no hurry. It drives me nuts especially since so many of our friends and family helped us out in really big ways. I finally got him to agree to do them right after we move this weekend by bringing the subject up in public, in front of friends. Being held accountable by an outside source was the incentive he needed.

redheadtmk

oh and for the record I would not call my husband lazy.....he is usually very helpful

Aimeeeee

Don't do them yourself or he'll constantly avoid cos he knows things will get done eventually.. By you. Don't know if this will work for you but what works with my fi is saying 'right this and this needs doing, which do you want to do?' Make the other option sound less flattering and he gets on with it. Lol

mrsconn23

Compromise. 

If he really doesn't want to write TY's then he can do extra chores or stuff around the house.

FLANYTATOOGURL

In Response to Re:Lazy husband no thank you's written:[QUOTE]Compromise.nbsp; If he really doesn't want to write TY's then he can do extra chores or stuff around the house. Posted by mrs.conn23[/QUOTE]

Just have him do the dishes for the next month. How is his hand writing? Most guys I know write like they are doctors.

*Barbie*

The rule in our house is the one i grew up with - we don't use a gift/cash a check/etc. until the TY note is sent. I get my husband to sit down and work on them with me ( in cases where we have a lot) and split it up by family/primary relationship (i.e. - I write the TYs to my family, he writes them to his. We switch and write the addresses for the other person's cards.)

If I were you, I'd hand him all of the supplies and (ask) him to finsih by the end of the day.

Wzz

i say do them yourself. it isn't just him that will seem rude, you both will.

DG1

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_lazy-husband-no-thank-yous-written?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:cb581a38-3e96-4c79-9ec5-c2e617487b9aPost:61890a9a-d9c1-46a9-94c8-7b3521892503">Re: Lazy husband = no thank you's written</a>:
[QUOTE]i say do them yourself. it isn't just him that will seem rude, you both will.
Posted by Wzz[/QUOTE]

Word. In general, I agree with not doing stuff he is supposed to be doing. But unless YOU want to look like an ass, you need to write those notes.

Then make him pay for being a shithead about it.

kaceymarie

send out yours. tell him if he wants to thank his family then he'll have to send them out himself.

Wzz

the gifts were for both of them, so really they both have the responsibility to write them here.

life doesn't have to be even stevens. he can make up the difference in other ways.

TKzilla

Barbie, that is a really great idea!

spartybride3

That's the thing...if he doesn't do something, he knows I will get fed up and do it myself, thus the task avoidance. I can do the same thing to him, it just takes a lot of will power from myself & a few weeks before he does what I want him to do. There are no extra chores he can do...I clean during the week & he does a big cleaning on the weekend. He avoids dishes like the plague. 

I don't want to be naggy, but seriously, write your 20 thank you's & call it a day. I feel like I just keep bugging him...

TKzilla

Pull a Harry Potter move and have the damn things come flying out of your chimney at them.

Even on Sunday. Doesn't matter if there's no post on Sunday.

EK2013

I did a lot of just putting the pen in DH's hand and putting the stationery in front of him.

I also took all of our mutual friends because there was no reason for me to fuss about "fair numbers" when I was done with my list and he was working more slowly on his.