Not a rehearsal dinner

hollieheidi

The night before the wedding my mother has requested that we have some sort of get-together for the immediate family.  The reason is that my parents are divorced and my mother's boyfriend and my FI family have not met my father and his family because they live a distance away.  It won't really be a rehearsal dinner, but a get-together, but we can't afford to add this to our budget and my mother cannot afford it either.  We would like to all meet at a restaurant and everyone pay for their own.My question is....do we just say something on our website like, "C'mon out and enjoy dinner with the bride and groom.  They will be dining at ......." so everyone will know or do we just spread the word by mouth.  We have some other OOT guests and this would be a nice way to hang out with them the night before as well.My parents are old enough to handle themselves, but it's just to basically take the tension off the day of the wedding...Ideas?

hollieheidi

gotcha!  That's kinda what I thought too!   I don't have a problem telling the family directly, but then to let the OOT guests know...the guest list is so small that we talk to those people pretty regular so it won't be a problem either. Thanks!  

mbcdefg

I would either do something casual and inexpensive (like Stage said ... pizza, burgers, sandwiches, pasta), or ask your mother to pay for it if it means that much to her.

aerinpegadrak

We're doing some simple sandwiches for our "rehearsal" lunch, shouldn't cost too much.  We're not doing anything super fancy the night before (mainly because we expect most people to arrive the morning of), but we're going to have beer and pizza in our hotel suite for anyone who wants to join us.It doesn't have to be really expensive.  If it's really important to your mom, tell her, "We really can't afford to do this, but if this is really important to you, here's a few super cheap options that you could host."

alithebride

is it directly after the rehearsal? if so then doing something inexpensive and paying for everyone (by your mother since she's requesting it) is the right way to go. if you ask people to partake in the rehearsal and then invite them to dinner you (or someone) should provide it. perhaps some pizzas and pastas ordered from the local pizza place-that's inexpensive and comfort food. maybe she could consider hosting it at her house as it's her idea. if it's not after the rehersal then word-of-mouth to those who you wish to be there will work.

jennsper

For our get together were doing a cookout(burgers,chips,baked beans etc) in our back yard. Most of our guest are oot. My mom said we should pay for them since they live far away. My parents and my fi parents are devorced and remarried. My dad and step mom havent met my fi parents. I understand hopefully it will take off some tension.

hollieheidi

In the end I contacted a local restaurant that we love and reserved the room for 15-25 people.  I extended the invite on our website and I'll just have to pony up the $$$ for whomever shows up.  When I told the family members about it everyone was very excited. Call it peer pressure or whatever, but I'd hate to disappoint and it'll be fun anyway!  The menu is pretty affordable so we'll just have to make room in the budget!