Wedding Reception Forum

No Rsvp No Food

We're doing a buffet style meal for the reception, and we don't want people who don't rsvp to eat cuz that's a plate we didn't buy. Is there any ways to prevent those who didn't rsvp from getting a plate. Or should we just plan for that to happen anyways

Re: No Rsvp No Food

  • Plan for that to happen!  Also, as it gets close to your RSVP deadline ask them if theyre coming!  I have found three sets of people that just arent going to send back their RSVP card that have to FMIL or my grandma that theyre coming.
  • If people who didn't rsvp, but were invited, show up, you can't refuse to feed them. That's horrible. These are your friends and family. You need to plan to feed people. Or make sure you stay on top of those who don't send their rsvp in to find out if they plan on coming. A good caterer will plan for some additional food. Our caterer makes 5% over the final head count. I'd suggest you opt for something similar if you're seriously concerned that people will show up without having rsvped.
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  • You should plan for everyone who attends your wedding to eat at the reception.  After your RSVP deadline passes, give people a two or three days (so mail can catch up) and then make phone calls to those who did not RSVP.  It is okay to give people you cannot reach a firm deadline in the form of "if we do not hear from you by X, we will mark you as a no" - but you should definitely plan on feeding all of the guests who are there that day.
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  • HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
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    edited August 2012
    You should call non RSVPs and ask if they are coming or not.  Although it's rude on the guests part to show up without rsvping you should have extra plates to avoid embarrassment.
     
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  • When we made our phone calls, we ran into a few cases of RSVPs that were lost in the mail, and one that was lost in the car (fell out of a stack of mail on it's way to the mailbox and slid under the seat).   Sometimes these things happen.    

    If you're doing a buffet, your caterer will have enough food for a few last-minute guests, and you will still have leftovers, I promise.  Do your best to get them an accurate number (this is where the phone calls come in), but realize there may be some last minute "yesses" and "nos" after you submit your final head count.   
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  • Won't you also run into the problem of some people RSVPing "yes" and then not being able to make it, or some people hopefully RSVPing with a date and then coming alone. Feed everyone who is there, but do your best to have an accurate count ahead of time. It would just be too rude to have someone go up to a guest at the reception and say, "you can't eat."
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  • I really think this is more of a problem with a plated meal, vs a buffet. There may be a few who RSVP no (or just don't answer) who show up. But it is likely to be offset by those who RSVP yes & then end up no-show. We didn't have any surprise guests, but we did have about 10% not show. With a buffet, there is more wiggle room with extra food. If someone comes, then you need to feed them. 
  • If you're having your buffet catered, you WILL have extra plates. It's basically against health code for people to reload their dirty plate, so if anyone has seconds, they'll need a new plate and your caterer will have them available. You follow up with people who haven't RSVP'd (as PPs have said), make a guess (yes/no) about those you can't get in touch with, and give a final number to your caterer. Unless the number you gave is WAY off, your caterer will be fine with it. If it's off by more than a few, I'd suggest you offer to make up the difference. But that's why you need to track people down and get their RSVPs. 
  • if you dont get their rsvp card call them.

     

  • edited August 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_no-rsvp-no-food?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:1b95c06d-58f1-4043-9ba1-76c565188845Post:70ff94b0-6859-433f-b1db-0d97a928748e">No Rsvp No Food</a>:
    [QUOTE]We're doing a buffet style meal for the reception, and we don't want people who don't rsvp to eat cuz that's a plate we didn't buy. Is there any ways to prevent those who didn't rsvp from getting a plate. Or should we just plan for that to happen anyways
    Posted by Ckdingy2014[/QUOTE]

    Ummmm you can't deny your guests food! That is horrible!
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