Assigning seats at reception

Stayc516

I've been debating on whether to have table numbers and a seating chart for my reception. My fiance thinks it's a bad idea because his family will complain endlessly after the wedding saying "I can't believe they made us sit in a specific place." He doesn't want to deal with their complaining. My family on the other hand would be ok and would even expect it for a formal wedding. My fiance's family aren't used to formal events or how things are supposed to be for a formal wedding. I'm afriad if I don't have a seating chart that people will feel awkward when finding a seat. With a seating chart, I can place people with like family members and so forth. I think it's ridiculous that his family will complain about it but I still want to have some sort of order. Help?!?

ShakeUpTampa

I vote seated because I hate just grabbing a table wherever and then if someone else takes it while I am getting food I have to look like an idiot finding another place. I also want to make sure besides immediate family the elderly is not forced to sit closer to the speakers, and the kids are not seated right next to the alcohol haha

jessicabessica

We are assigning tables but not seats.  Having totally open seating sounds like a logistical nightmare to me (we are having probably 175 people).  If you do open seating, you have to have extra tables and chairs to account for people not packing themselves in as efficiently, and you don't want families or couples to have to split up because there are no more seats together.  If your FI's family is really against it, maybe try telling them that they will have plenty of time to mingle and get up and move around when they're dancing and in between courses.  

newsgrl39

I say assign tables... I went to a wedding last year that didn't have assigned tables. FI and I showed up late and we ended up having to stand at a cocktail table bc we couldn't find anywhere to sit... we only knew a handful of people... it was super awkward....

NOLAbridealmost

I think it depends on your crowd and the formality of your event.  In New Orleans, it's more common to have a station/cocktail style reception with open seating. It's what we did this past Sunday. It went over GREAT with my side of the family, but DH's grandparents from New York seemed beyond confused.  If your family and friends are the mix and mingle type then open is fine....it also helps if it's what the majority of your guests are used to. 

Milsey32

Like PPs said -- You know your guests best... if you think open seating would go over well, then go for it, but personally I would rather know where I'm sitting (by table, not specific seat) so I don't feel silly standing with my plate of food (if you have a buffet) or drink (if it's an open bar) while I browse for an empty seat by someone I know

mary9449

We are assigning tables. I've been to too many weddings that open seating has caused chaos and people lump around some tables and only a couple people are at another. I vote for assigned tables.

afb124

we're assigning tables only. I've never been to a reception where an actual seat at a table was assigned. 

vexie

In my area is very common to assign actual seats (in fact, I can't remember attending a wedding where I didn't have a specific chair with my name on it).  We're just assigning tables though.  It's a small venue and I need to make sure everyone gets a seat, however they can sit where they want at that table.

trix1223

Doing table assignments is actually a courtesy to your guests. It ensures that people who don't get along won't end up stuck with each other because they're the only open seats left.

It ensures that couples or families won't be split up because there are not enough seats left at any given table when they arrive.

It ensures that Great Aunt Hilda won't be seated with your FIs college frat brothers, or that Grandpa Al won't end up sitting right next to the dj's speakers.

It ensures that your college roommate, who doesn't know anyone but you at the wedding, won't wander the room hoping that she can sit somewhere. (Remember the cafeteria in Jr. High?)

It ensures that you won't have 11 people jammed into a table that seats 8 comfortably because people decided to pull up chairs so they could all sit together.

It also saves you $$, because when you don't have assigned tables, you need to have extras because you WILL end with tables of 4 where you intended to have 8.

I've only been to one wedding without table assignments, and it was a holy mess as people wandered around trying to figure out where they were supposed to sit.

Do table assignments.

aegrish

Do you have enough room to NOT do table assignments?

Personally, I ALWAYS prefer a seating chart.  I like not having to search for empty seats, hope I know SOMEONE at the table.  Plus if you want certain guests in certain spots of the room (i.e. our older relatives aren't going to want to sit next to the DJ, but our younger guests won't care) than a seating chart is the only way to set that up.

My FI's family is the same way.  Small town, country wedding are what they're used to.  Before he met me my FI had never been to a wedding with seating charts.  He adjusted just fine and never complained.