Wedding Reception Forum

Open Bar Help!!

So my fiance and I really want an open bar at our wedding, but we each have family members that tend to drink wayyyy too much and get carried away with things that they say, plus some alcoholics and some recovering alcoholics. Should we do an open bar during dinner and then change it to a cash bar? Or an open bar just for dinner and then close it? Just beer and wine? Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated :)

Re: Open Bar Help!!

  • Cash bars won't prevent drunks from getting drunk.  Bars charge for drinks and people manage to get drunk in them ;)
  • I agree, people who want to get drunk are going to do so regardless of whether or not they have to pay for it. Alcoholics don't care about money they care about alcohol.  Short of having a dry wedding you can not stop them.  I think you should stick with the open bar.  Everyone has those family members that get out of control, just do your best to roll with it and enjoy your open bar and I know your guests will.
  • Etiquette aside I think it would be confusing to your guests to go from having an open bar to then having to pay for their drinks.

    As pp's have said Cash bars don't limit consumption.  The best thing to do if you are really worried is either serve low alcohol wine/beer/punch and/or have well trained bar staff who can turn people away if they are drunk or have a dry reception.
  • Stick with the open bar, and if you want, keep it to beer & wine.  Not only did this help decrease our alcohol cost, but also the main reason we did not want to serve hard liquor is to keep people from slamming shots all night.  Our venue has a rule in place for those who have full bar that there are no shots the last hour of the reception, as they had had several incidents of people loading up on shots in the last hour, increasing their liabilty.

    You may want to talk to your venue on their policies about serving visibly intoxicated people. Most if not all venues carry liability insurance so ultimately it falls on them to cut people off. As PPs have said, people who drink too much are going to do it no matter what. It's not fair to penalize those who are responsible by changing to a cash bar, which is definitely frowned upon. Do I think that serving only beer or wine is going to stop people from getting drunk? No, but I have confidence in my family & friends to know when they have had enough and to have an agreement on who the DD is.  Well most of them anyway...
    Crosswalk
  • Cash bar is not going to keep people from getting drunk if they want to.  People get trashed on their own dime all the time.

    If you suspect that a few people will drink too much, discuss it with your bartender.  It is their job to cut people off who've had enough.  The venue staff can also help if someone is going overboard or trying to make a scene.

    Doing beer/wine will limit some people, or if you still want to serve liquor, you can do no shots and no 3 liquor drinks (like long islands) to keep the drinks from being too strong.   
  • If you still wanted some liquor on top of the beer and wine, you could just do a signature drink or two.  That way people who aren't into beer or wine still have an option, but it won't be as easy for people to get totally trashed.

    Definitely talk to your venue about your concerns.  I'm sure they'll have some options for you that don't involve making the guests pay.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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