Yes Seating chart....no seating chart?

JKeyes2011

I'm trying to decide if I want to do a seating chart or not for the wedding. I think the place cards are a wonderful idea.

I've gone to one wedding with places and I loved the idea of it. The issue with my fam is that they might bring extra people with them and such and I don't want them throwing my setup off.
Guess I will sit on the idea for a moment.

trix1223

Doing table assignments is actually a courtesy to your guests. It ensures that people who don't get along won't end up stuck with each other because they're the only open seats left.

It ensures that couples or families won't be split up because there are not enough seats left at any given table when they arrive.

It ensures that Great Aunt Hilda won't be seated with your FIs college frat brothers, or that Grandpa Al won't end up sitting right next to the dj's speakers.

It ensures that your college roommate, who doesn't know anyone but you at the wedding, won't wander the room hoping that she can sit somewhere. (Remember the cafeteria in Jr. High?)

It ensures that you won't have 11 people jammed into a table that seats 8 comfortably because people decided to pull up chairs so they could all sit together.

It also saves you $$, because when you don't have assigned tables, you need to have extras because you WILL end with tables of 4 where you intended to have 8.

I've only been to one wedding without table assignments, and it was a holy mess as people wandered around trying to figure out where they were supposed to sit.

Do table assignments.

texaslolamy

ditto to PP. It may seem like chore for you, but it ends up being much more smooth and organized the day of. Plus, it isn't that bad really making one. Don't seat people together who don't get along, and seat similar ages together. There you go.

If you're inviting +1s, the proper thing to do would be to find out the full name of the +1 and write out a card for them just as you would any other guest. If you are saying that people might bring +1s who weren't invited with a +1, then make it clear to these people that no univited guests can come.

Lasairiona

Assigned seating is a must. However, skip the display chart and just have placecards on a table that guests can pick up and carry with them to find their table. Then let them pick whichever chair they want.

Otherwise you will have mass chaos with open seating. Couples and families always get split up, chairs are saved for friends who never even sit there and those folks don't give them up for anything. Also, if you have a display chart rather than individual placecards for guests to pick up, you will have traffic jams as most charts are printed small enough that you have to be standing right next to it. Then multiply that by how many guests you have who will crowding in at the same time. On the way to their tables, they will get sidetracked while chatting with other guests and forget what table they were assigned to.

flutgrl1

Open seating doesn't have to equal chaos. Heck, I've seen more chaos of people wondering around lost at receptions trying to find their assigned tables. (nothing says formal than people yelling hey is THIS table six over the band?!) Just have more seats/tables than you have guests. This way people can move freely (like they would as adults in real life) and visit with one another.

MyNameIsNot

If you decide to go with open seating, the way to make it work is to have extra seating.  We had seats for 120 and 100 guests.  There was plenty of space so people didn't have to split up their groups or drag chairs around. 

If you decide to do seating, that's fine too.  It's really rude for people to bring along uninvited guests, especially without even telling you about it ahead of time.  I'd be surprised if people actually do this.  Unless you are paying for a ton of extra food, they won't have a meal, so I don't see why the crashers need a chair.

gottahavashorti

Assign at least tables unless you will have a decent amount of extra seating.

Think of it as a learning experience for your family.

squinger

Not doing assigned seating. We are reserving a few of the tables up front for immdiate family (Parents and Grandpartents) as well as the signifficant others of the bridal party attendants.

Personaly I am against assigned seating, as I was at a wedding of family member and I was not seated with my family for one, Second, I was seated at a table where I knew no one!

You are inviting adults and they should feel comfortable durring your reception, You dont do assigned seating for the ceremony so why do it for the reception? If they dont want to sit by a certian person then they will and can find another seat. We just want our guests to have fun and enjoy themselves, not be all worried about who they are going to be sitting next to.Also it makes less work for you to do worrying about who you can sit with who.

JKeyes2011

Thanks guys!

Sadly I'm in Europe for quite a long time and I won't be home until March and so I'm waiting for my mom to get back to me with information on the tables at the venue. Planning this wedding from overseas is quite funny.
I'm living here with my FI who is from Europe and I explained to him the seating chart idea last night and he looked at me so lost so and told me to slow it down and explain it with props, it was pretty funny. He is okay with whatever idea.

When my mom gets back to me I will be deciding on if I will be doing a seating chart and when I am finally home I can actually make it happen.

trix1223

squinger, the problem at the wedding you attended was NOT about assigned seating.  It was about an insensitive bride and groom who did not carefully think about seating their guests.

Please don't blame your experience at that wedding with assigned seating.  It was a host problem, not a seating problem.

friendlypeanut

I say no. Your guests should be allowed to sit where they please. They won't be "stuck" with people they don't like, your guests will hang out with people they like including during dinner.

Some guests might want to catch up with old friends or family members, they should be allowed to wander and mingle as they please.

gottahavashorti

[QUOTE]I say no. Your guests should be allowed to sit where they please. They won't be "stuck" with people they don't like, your guests will hang out with people they like including during dinner. Some guests might want to catch up with old friends or family members, they should be allowed to wander and mingle as they please.
Posted by friendlypeanut[/QUOTE]

The point of a seating chart is to ensure that this happens by seating guests with old friends, family members, etc.  They will not have to scramble to find a seat, pull up extra chairs, couples who come alone won't have that awkward "hi... mind if we sit here?" or be the odd one out of their group who doesn't fit at the table.

Of course, adding a good bit of extra seating also can allow them to find seating where they wish but can increase the cost of rentals and centerpieces.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_yes-seating-chartno-seating-chart?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:3bb733fe-f7fc-425a-bfaf-1d67aef569abPost:1cb515d6-f7a7-494c-b287-2cd368b05ce2">Re: Yes Seating chart....no seating chart?</a>:
[QUOTE]Not doing assigned seating. We are reserving a few of the tables up front for immdiate family (Parents and Grandpartents) as well as the signifficant others of the bridal party attendants. Posted by squinger[/QUOTE]

Please do not do this.  You should never rank your guests.  You would send a message to the rest of your guests that they are second tier and not very important.  If you are going to seat some people, seat them all.

As PP said, your WP dates should be seated with the WP.  It is rude to separate couples.

aerinpegadrak

You know, an assigned seat doesn't equal a ball and chain.  Guests can and will still mingle with whomever they choose, but it's nice to have a home base.  If anything, guests are less likely to get up and mingle with open seating, for fear that they'll come back and their seat will be gone.

danyl87

I haven't been to a wedding with assigned seating, they have been all "hall" receptions where there were so many tables that you couldn't assign people if you wanted to.  But planning my own and doing research on it has really lead me to think that definately a seating arrangement is a GREAT idea.  You can fit people into the tables so that families aren't getting split up, people around other people they know/get along with, the awkward "is this seat taken" sentence.  I agree with PP that it doesn't mean they're chained down.  They can still get up and talk to everyone else.  They'll just have a sure place to sit while they eat.  I am for sure making one for my wedding!!