Private Ceremony

MeggTK

We're thinking about having a private ceremony, but then I feel funny asking people to come to just the reception.  Anyone do this or something similar?  Or know of someone who has?  Just wondering the eitiquette of doing something this way.

twilight.rose

If you are truly having a private ceremony (just you and your FI, and possibly your immediate families), the general etiquette is that it is okay to have a larger reception. The invitations would simply say something like "Your Presence is Requested at a Reception Celebrating the Marriage of Bride to Groom on Date at Location/Time."

If, however, you end up not having a private ceremony (i.e. friends or extended family attend), it would be extremely rude to invite anyone not invited to the ceremony to the reception. If you still wanted to keep things small, dinner at a nice restaurant, cake and punch only, etc. are perfectly acceptable reception options.

Kudos to you, though, for realizing it is typically bad form to send tiered invitations.

Norms Angel Forever

we're having family only at our ceremony and then all friends at the reception, it's very common in our area good luck

kimp67

I know a couple who did this.  I think the invitation said something like "jane & john were married in a private ceremony @_____, please join them in a celebration @.......

Goldlie11

It reminds me of this

http://www.intimateweddings.com/blog/real-weddings-jennifer-scotts-glass-studio-wedding-reception/

Just keep in mind that it won't really save you any money.  

AbbeyS2011

A cousin of mine had a small private ceremony for close family and friends, then a HUGE reception at a hotel ballroom - it was fabulous!  No one seemed to mind at all!

I have many friends that are Mormom (LDS) and unless you are a practicing member in their church, you are not allowed to attend the wedding ceremony, if it takes place in the Mormon church/temple.  I have been invited to receptions after the ceremony, and I have not ever felt slighted.

The invites have read something like this:  Jack and Jill Jones request your presence at their Wedding Reception ...

nomaids

My boyfriend has not popped the question just yet, but he is working on it. Our wedding will not be until sometime next year, like after summer vacation like in October,2014. I really like a private ceremony , he does not a lot of people, and i do not have a lot of friends. And then we can go to dinner afterwards. Then head off to our honeymoon destination. Any ideas? I want to wear a dress for my occasion.

TiaTea

Actually, inviting just a few people to the ceremony, and more to the reception, if just fine.
The other way - nviting people to the ceremony, but not to the reception,  is not.
The ceremony , no matter how elaborate, or simple , is the legal part ( saying I do, signing of papers...). The reception is the party, the festivities ,  no matter how simple or lavish.
As long as you invite to the reception everybody who was invited to the ceremony , it's fine from the etiquette point ov view.

Having a small ceremony , BTW, is not the same as elopement. Elopement by definition is something done in secret. If you inform people what your plans are, even the smallest ceremony is not an elopement.

You can wear a "bridal" dress at a small ceremony, and even for an elopement ceremony too.

The smallest wedding I have been to, was 13 people: the bride and groom, the parents of both , the  sisters of both and the BILs ( each have one sister and they are married)   BM and MOH( me) being the only friends there ,  and one grandmother.
It was a city hall ceremony . The bride had a beautiful tea length white dress, the groom and BM had suits. The bride never even asked for specific colors of me. She just told me to wear what I have and like.
After the ceremony we went to a reastaurant . it was on Friday
They had a family get together  over the weekend, hosted at one of the parents' houses,  and went on vacation the week after.

MyNameIsNot

What is with bumping random posts from 2010?  

Lyanthanie

My fiance and I are doing this. We are going to write "On such and such date, Your Name and His Name will be wed in a private ceremony in Whatever Location. Please join us in a celebration of our union..."

We figured this was the best way to have a private ceremony for just us, and then a big blow out reception in a state closer to our families.