Wedding Reception Forum

First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!

My fiance and I have decided that we'd like to do something a little different for our first dance. Keep in mind we NEVER dance/have no rhythm lol and this will totally throw our guests off because it will be so unexpected. My DJ is putting the mix together for us and we have a dance coordinator working with us to make sure we get everything down. I keep having second thoughts about doing this since it is so out of my usual comfort zone and all eyes will be on us! Please give me your honest opinions and let me know what you think!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8o9lOCh_XvI&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!

  • I really hope this link shows up because I think you need to read all of the responses to it.

    http://forums.weddings.com/Sites/Weddings/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_bride-and-bridesmaid-dance-surprise-for-groom
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:8cbfb9ee-291f-48a3-98eb-0d2290496792">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I really hope this link shows up because I think you need to read all of the responses to it. <a href="http://forums.weddings.com/Sites/Weddings/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_bride-and-bridesmaid-dance-surprise-for-groom" rel="nofollow">http://forums.weddings.com/Sites/Weddings/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_bride-and-bridesmaid-dance-surprise-for-groom</a>
    Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

    It would be just my FI and I, not any of the bridal party. If you looked at the video, each clip was maybe 10 seconds long with really simple moves. it's not the moves we are needing help with, it's putting it all together. I think it's a cute idea because we are both on board and willing to do something a little different, even if it's outside of our comfort zone.

    Thank you for your input :)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:9d0edd91-0faa-42e4-b5a6-42b1a5151c47">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]You never dance. You admit this is out of your comfort zone. WHY do you want to do this?
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    Sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone and take a little risk. Since it's something we both are interested in doing, we just thought it would be a neat idea. We obviously wouldn't go through with it if we both didn't want to do it, or if we thought we would look absolutely ridiculous and embarass ourselves at our own wedding.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:cc1ad2a7-9c49-418c-9ab0-488fdfba2fe4">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!! : <strong>Sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone and take a little risk.</strong> Since it's something we both are interested in doing, we just thought it would be a neat idea. We obviously wouldn't go through with it if we both didn't want to do it, or if we thought we would look absolutely ridiculous and embarass ourselves at our own wedding.
    Posted by rkw0717[/QUOTE]

    Yes, it is great to step out of your comfort zone sometimes, but not at your wedding.  Do you realize just how much of a happiness fog you will be in that day.  Do you really want to try to remember even the simplest of dance steps?

    Please do not subject your guests to watch something that will most likely be very uncomfortable and embarrasing for them to witness.  Anytime I see videos of these dances they always make me cringe because they are never ever good and I just feel so uncomfortable for the people involved in the dance and for the guests who had to witness it.

  • Well for the first time since we've decided to do this and after reading your ideas, I'm starting to decide against it :(

    While we really would like to do this, the last thing we would want would be our guests to feel uncomfortable. Not sure how THEY would feel embarrassed (I think if anyone would end up embarrassed it would be us) but definitely don't want to put anyone in that situation.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:d66bacb3-939a-4137-b966-16b4fe5e7357">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!! : It's perfectly natural to feel embarrassed for someone else at times.  Have you ever been watching something like American Idol and been so embarrassed for the person on stage that you had to turn the channel/walk out of the room? 
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    lol yea, I know what you mean. MY FI and I are really outgoing people and like having a good time. Even if we messed up a dance move (or two) or even forgot some of the moves, it really wouldn't be something that we would be so embarrassed we would regret it for the rest of our lives. Most of our guests are young, so we just thought it would be something fun they would enjoy.

    I
  • So I tried to watch the video and the first thought I had was does it really go on for six minutes?  That seems like an incredibly long time.  Standing around watching people sway for 3ish minutes is weird enough at a wedding reception.  At 6, I'd be heading to your bar before you'd finished.

    If you are having second thoughts about this, I'd listen to your gut.  Your nerves and emotions will be all over the place on your wedding day, even with the ceremony part out of the way. 

    For our first dance, DH and I did take lessons and did learn some basic waltz steps - but we weren't shooting for a production, we just wanted some technique since neither one of us is a natural dancer.  I think that if you want some lessons or choreography help, that's one thing (and it can be fun), but I wouldn't add routine.  The last thing you want to remember is dance steps to something if you aren't used to that type of preparation.  You don't want your guests to be cringing for you - or to put updo pressure on yourself.
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  • I think you should do whatever makes you two happy!  If doing something different sounds like fun, then do it!  If you mess up or make a mistake, it's only your dear friends and family watching!  
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  • It looks like fun. Just cut loose. If you want to do this do it. IT IS YOUR WEDDING DAY.

     
  • Think this would be really cute! As a professional dancer/performer I will tell you that it will only be funny/cute if you can really commit to everything, if you look nervous/scared you will make your guests/audience uncomfortable. Otherwise I say go for it, it's your wedding day! Have fun!
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  • It sounds like you're not so sure of the idea yourself. You say it's out of your comfort zone, but it might be more helpful to ask if it's out of your character? If this is in-line with your personalities, then the people who know you best will probably love it and be impressed that you learned the dance!

    Also, working together on something like this can be a great team-builder - especially since you'll have to help each other through the learning process and the dance itself.  

    Maybe you can have a regular recording of your song lined up in case you decide to play it safe at the last minute? Just a thought. Good luck whatever you decide!

  • edited May 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:ee867225-23da-41c2-b98f-396b75faa19b">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]It sounds like you're not so sure of the idea yourself. You say it's out of your comfort zone, but it might be more helpful to ask if it's out of your character? If this is in-line with your personalities, then the people who know you best will probably love it and be impressed that you learned the dance!
    Posted by MeganMcKenna[/QUOTE]

    I really agree with this.  The times I have seen things like this work at weddings were times when it was EXACTLY the personalities of the people involved to do something like that.  The times it has been awkward are when the people involved act like they're performing at being performers, if that makes sense, rather than just naturally being perform-y people.
  • monkeysipmonkeysip member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited May 2012
    I don't have a problem with it, as long as its something you both really want to do.

    My FI and I are kind of split.  I would love to learn a really choreographed fun dance, but he doesn't really like to dance.  So we're going to do something more simple but fun because ultimately he does like the idea of learning how to do some dance moves so that we don't just do the high-school like slow dance in front of everyone.

    I think the key here is fun and confidence.  If you mess up, laugh, keep going, and just enjoy being with your husband, and others won't feel uncomfortable.  I don't think these kinds of dances are any more awkward than the normal first dances you see.  At least something like this wouldn't put me to sleep.

    It was a little long though.  I would have the first part (the slow, normal dancing) be really short, then get into the fun part early.  Then cut it off before it gets too long.

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  • Okay so I love this. Yeah they aren't the best dancers but they look so cute and happy together and they look like they are having a blast. A first dance they will never forget.
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  • Thank you all for your responses! I wanted to get an overall feel from others as to what they would think. I knew not everyone would like it, and I'm really glad to see that some of you do!

    I was to the point of deciding against it yesterday afternoon, and when I got home, I told FI how I was feeling. He was more disappointed than I was, he actually wanted to do it more than I did lol! That made me feel a little better about it, and then our dance coordinator called. She said she watched the video a few times and has it all worked up for us and is very excited to be doing this with us. She said she's done a few similar type dances and they were a blast! She sent me videos of some she has done and the crowd seemed to love it! Then my DJ also called and said they have it ready for us and is going to tape it at our wedding to show future brides.

    We both do have the personalities to do something like this...I know our friends/family/colleagues would think it's great. They wouldn't be expecting it because they know we don't dance, but they know we are both very laid back, love to laugh and have a good time. Like I said earlier, even if we mess up a few moves, it's no biggie. Considering where we started, to pull this off would be a big thing for us both! We've both talked about wanting to start dance classes anyway (even before we decided to do this dance) and our venue is actually at a really nice dance hall, with our dance coordinator being the owner.

    Thanks again! I'll stop rambling now lol.
  • rlavachrlavach member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    Like everyone else said, as long as you keep it short and you really throw yourself into it, I think it would be fun. There will always be those guests who will judge you because you weren't traditional enough or because you were too traditional. I think it would be fun & unexpected. Just dont' drag it on. 

    We also wanted to be a little different so after our introduction, instead of going straight into the first dance, we had the DJ keep playing 3 fun, upbeat songs & invite everyone out into the dance floor. Of course, I told a few key friends that I knew were dancers of my plan so that they could help get everyone out there. Since everyone is expecting the boring first dance, I thought it would be fun to start the night with dancing. It really worked. Everyone was up & had a blast. It took the pressure of my shy DH because we were in the middle of lots of people & it set the tone for the night that this was a fun dancing event. So in short, I say you should go for it.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_first-dance-ideaplease-give-me-your-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:601e6e42-976a-4b37-90b8-b85d6b9e868cPost:bbdf0869-8a84-4530-baca-792f78832b82">Re: First dance idea....PLEASE give me your opinions!!!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Like everyone else said, as long as you keep it short and you really throw yourself into it, I think it would be fun. There will always be those guests who will judge you because you weren't traditional enough or because you were too traditional. I think it would be fun & unexpected. Just dont' drag it on.  We also wanted to be a little different <strong>so after our introduction, instead of going straight into the first dance, we had the DJ keep playing 3 fun, upbeat songs & invite everyone out into the dance floor</strong>. Of course, I told a few key friends that I knew were dancers of my plan so that they could help get everyone out there. Since everyone is expecting the boring first dance, I thought it would be fun to start the night with dancing. It really worked. Everyone was up & had a blast. It took the pressure of my shy DH because we were in the middle of lots of people & it set the tone for the night that this was a fun dancing event. So in short, I say you should go for it.
    Posted by rlavach[/QUOTE]

    OOooh I really like that idea too! It kind of gets the mood going and a little different than the traditional order of things! I may have to borrow your idea and then have our DJ announce time for our first dance. We'll probably start off slow for a short bit and then start the whole deal. We def. won't make it near as long as the video, but just as people are settling down from the first few dances and expecting a slow dance and then surprise!

    Thanks for the input and another good idea!
  • LizzyRBLizzyRB member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    I like it
  • If dancing was your thing, I'd say go for it, but it's not, and I can't help but thinking that the anticipation of doing this dance may really get to you on your wedding day.  I'm not sure where this idea of the bride and groom performing came from, I guess it was in effort to avoid the three minute "hold each other and sway".  My FI and I have chosen a two minute song, because he's not much of a dancer, and we're learning the foxtrot, so we have actual dance steps to do.
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  • It's not anything new or different anymore, and 6 minutes is WAY too long.  Keep it short and sweet and realize everyone has probably already seen it done at some other wedding, and do it if you really want to.
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