Sweetheart Table vs. Bridal Party Table

Christina R Flowers

Hello all!
 
My fiance and I were excited to have our best friends, the bridal party, at a table with us, and don't like the idea of a sweetheart table, which feels silly for our style.  But everyone in our bridal party is married, and we aren't sure if it's rude to put all their spouses at a seperate table.  They mostly don't know each other, but they are all very outgoing and not shy.  Should we do a sweetheart table so the bridal party can sit with their significant others, or should we have a bridal party table and put the S.O. at a table very near us?

HobokensFury

I personally don't like head tables for this reason.  If I was a BM I would not want to be separated from my SO especially if we didn't know anyone else.

Simply Fated

I'm not sure why a sweetheart table would look silly for the style you're going for, but a head table wouldn't. Putting the SOs at a nearby table isn't necessary. You might as well put their table across the room. Either you seat them together or you don't. Please do. You don't want to sit separate from your husband and neither do they.

jemmini6

Splitting couples is very rude.  If you aren't too crazy about the idea of a sweethart table, you could always just sit at a regular table with whomever you choose and not have any sort of 'being on display' table.

aragx6

Don't split up the couples. If you don't want a sweetheart table (not sure I understand why though), have you thought about a king's table?

Tanq&Tonic

Definitely don't split the couples.  I don't know what a King's Table is, but I've seen one long banquet table where the bridal party & dates all sit at the head table with the bride & groom.

DH was a groomsman in a wedding where he was seated up on a stage with the bridal party and the dates were all mixed in the back of the room.  He ended up being a 3rd wheel with the bride and groom because most of the night because the bridal party would leave to go visit with their spouses throughout the night.  Kind of defeats the point at all.

Magdala9

I understand your dilemna.  I did not want to split up families and I did not want a sweetheart table.  We decided to use all round tables and seat our bridal party with their families.  We also sat at one of the round table with part of our bridal party. 

jessicabessica

Good call on not wanting to split up couples.  Have you thought about sitting at a round table with part of your bridal party and their SOs, like Magdala suggested?  If you want to have something different about your table, then talk to your venue about setting up a large enough table that you could sit with your bridal party and their SOs.

lopezalonso

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-vs-bridal-party-table?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:7b466485-2a0d-40d0-b567-92b77c205e4fPost:b53a96dc-0eda-4165-808e-d87bb8958f6e">Re: Sweetheart Table vs. Bridal Party Table</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Sweetheart Table vs. Bridal Party Table : I think it's rude to split up couple.  I would do a sweetheart table and let the WP sit with their dates.
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

This

TiffannieF

Every wedding I've been to has had a head table without SO's, I actually think it's pretty standard for people to know they will not be with their SOs during dinner...however it is rude to split them up. I've always sat at the headtable at a wedding when I was a BM and it kind if sucked because my husband wouldn't stay for the reception because he didn't want to sit with anybody else but me. We were going to do a a sweetheart table but last minute we found out that we needed to have one due to limited space (we would have had to add a table on the dance floor and take it down after dinner)...so we put the parents at the headtable. Both of our parents are divorced but it worked out great. Maybe you can consider parents being at the headtable.

blush64

I am having a head table with the bridal party and their spouses sitting together. In front of them we will have a table for myself and my FI, unless the maid of honour decides to sit there as well. (she is single and has chosen not to bring a date so I left her seating up to her) One of the best men will sit with us too. (his choice, and he's my son)

Let them sit with their dates. It's much nicer.

JeremyHeartTrena

I totally agree not splitting them up. The point of a wedding is bringing people together for love. Why split loved ones? It has never made sense to me. My fi and I are either going to have a sweetheart table or sit with some of the BP and their families.

Hitman

Why not try the third option. The Kings Table? You simply arrange it by pushing tables together to make them twice as wide. Everyone in the wedding party sits around it and you leave the space in the middle empty so the guests can see the bride and groom. It also makes for alot of space for a big centerpiece. Very elegant. It's the new thing.

adktd2boots

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_sweetheart-table-vs-bridal-party-table?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:7b466485-2a0d-40d0-b567-92b77c205e4fPost:0ef77a3a-2dc6-433e-aabb-9e20309fae1a">Re: Sweetheart Table vs. Bridal Party Table</a>:
[QUOTE]I understand your dilemna.  I did not want to split up families and I did not want a sweetheart table.  We decided to use all round tables and seat our bridal party with their families.  We also sat at one of the round table with part of our bridal party. 
Posted by Magdala9[/QUOTE]


I was in a wedding like this and it was fun! 

pretzelgrrl

My husband didn't want to do sweetheart table either and I didn't want a long "last supper" table with bridal party and spouse so we comprimised and did a round table with bride and groom, parents, and siblings.  Then we put bridesmaids and SO at another round table, and groomsmen and SOs at another round table.  I really liked it and got to talk to my new sister-in-law a lot and also spend time with my mom during dinner.

melntaitt

I agree with not splitting up the couples; it gets awkward and they shouldn't be abandoned at a party where they don't know people.

I was very against the sweetheart table too; but with some intervention from the caterers, lighting company and florist, I'm warming up to the idea....

You don't have to, but please, don't split up the couples...

chattychiqa

I struggled with this decision too and ended up deciding to sit with my parents, inlaws, pastor and his wife. The WP and their spouses/dates will be distributed among nearby tables with people they know. Some members are or may be single and bringing a friend or family member as their +1 and one BM said she would feel weird displaying that at a head table. Different strokes. :-) This may be something you want to consider.