Reception Ideas

Open Bar Dilemma

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Re: Open Bar Dilemma

  • In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma:
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma : I strongly disagree with this statement.  You're saying that guests should pay for your wedding and that's just not ok.  You might be ok with guests "taking care of the cost" but your guests won't be.....And that's what etiquette is all about. I'm not saying you HAVE to have alcohol but just to have the wedding you can afford.  Even if its a dry one.
    Posted by ecsmiles
    Again, my sense of being a "proper host" is obviously different from others.  I don't see the impropriety in providing the option without covering the cost - especially in the case of "specialty" liquors, which are by no means a requirement for an enjoyable reception but may be something certain guests would enjoy.  That doesn't say "please pay for my party" to me.  Forcing people to pay for their entrees and dessert would imply that.

    I've been to several (non-wedding-related) parties where a cash bar was available.  Never have I felt slighted by that.  I don't see why a wedding would be a special exception.
  • tsp698tsp698
    10 Comments
    member
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma:
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma : If you are that concerned that people won't like what you are offering, then host more than just beer and wine.  Would you have the option for those who prefer seafood to pay for an upgrade?  No, right?   It is a guest's obligation to graciously accept what the host is offering.  
    Posted by Goldlie11
    While I agree that offering the option to pay for an upgrade in food is rude. I do not equate that as being the same as providing a cash bar (as long as something else is provided)

    I'm not going to go into the specifics as I am not looking to debate, so we can just agree to disagree on this point.

    For the record I, personally, am having an open bar. I just don't see anything wrong with a cash bar.



    image 107 Invited
    image 43 are ready to party! image 6 have better things to do image58 are lollygagging
    RSVP Date: July 23
  • In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma:
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma : While I agree that offering the option to pay for an upgrade in food is rude. I do not equate that as being the same as providing a cash bar (as long as something else is provided) I'm not going to go into the specifics as I am not looking to debate, so we can just agree to disagree on this point. For the record I, personally, am having an open bar. I just don't see anything wrong with a cash bar.
    Posted by tsp698
    That's fine and I respect that.  I will say in a non-argumentative way that the perception of rudeness usually various by region.  In NYC it's usually not done and some venue actually prohibit cash bar.  In other regions it's more common.  
  • tsp698tsp698
    10 Comments
    member
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma:
    In Response to Re: Open Bar Dilemma : That's fine and I respect that.  I will say in a non-argumentative way that the perception of rudeness usually various by region.  In NYC it's usually not done and some venue actually prohibit cash bar.  In other regions it's more common.  
    Posted by Goldlie11
    That is something else to take into consideration if you are considering going the cash bar route.  I know my venue "strongly discourages cash bars"
    image 107 Invited
    image 43 are ready to party! image 6 have better things to do image58 are lollygagging
    RSVP Date: July 23
  • I wish you hadn't quoted me because my post has a hell of a lot of typos lol.  It should say...
    That's fine and I respect that.  I will say in a non-argumentative way that the perception of rudeness usually varies by region.  In NYC it's usually not done and some venues actually prohibit cash bar.  In other regions it's more common.  
  • kpe04379kpe04379
    10 Comments
    member
    edited July 2010
    Yikes! To clarify, I am just speaking from experience of watching others at weddings...I think a lot of the time people forget how much alcohol they are drinking if it is mixed with something else, which liquor often is. I do think it is just as important to monitor all aclohol being served, though.

    When it comes down to it, I think it is important to remember that your guests are there to support the two of you, not because of the free alcohol or good (hopefully!) food. Do what you think is best, sschulth617 .
  • I think that a cash bar for liquor/wine is perfectly fine.  I think it would only be rude if you didn't tell people that was the case.  I went to a wedding once where the drink situation was not mentioned at all, anywhere, so I got to the wedding sans any money, and couldn't even have a soda because the entire wedding was cash bar only.  SO, you need to mention the drink situation to your guests.  If you don't want to do it in the invite/on the response card, point it out on a wedding website for guests.  Just don't let them go in unprepared.  Congrats!
    "It starts out all very nice, two people promising to be together forever, I'll die when you die, my life meant nothing until you used my toothbrush. Then you start planning the wedding. Aunt Junie's allergic to milk. Uncle Momo's off his meds..."
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