At-Home Reception

MrsDinius

My FH and I are getting married in March in Hawaii with just a few close family and friends as our guests. Neither of us wanted a huge wedding, but both sides of our families as well as a wealth of friends would have made that impossible. Given that, however, we cannot get away from having an at-home reception upon our return. We are simultaneously planning both events now, but are discovering we have two very different ideas of what type of reception to have. To conserve funds and stress for me I had in mind a 3-4 hour reception with buffet style lunch/brunch or dessert bar, slideshow and opportunity to mingle with everyone who wasn't at the wedding. His idea was to have a 5-6 hour bash with full buffet meal, open bar, dancing, full wedding cake and some sort of "program" to put us in the spotlight. He thinks my idea would be too boring and no one on his side would show up and I tried to explain to my FH that this reception should be a reflection of who we are, but said the only receptions he's ever been to are just big parties and figured it comes with the territory of getting married. He hates the idea of being in the spotlight, doesn't drink at all and admits neither of us would be on the dancefloor.He has agreed to consider other ideas for the reception as long as they're fun and compelling for our invited guests to come and spend time (not just eat and leave). I'm really struggling to come up with some fun themes and things for people to "do". I've thought of having a few things going on at once like a casino corner with blackjack or something, in another corner have a friend equipped with a camera and costumes so guests can have fun getting fun pictures taken, maybe a sketch artist for caricatures, karaoke... or maybe a big luau. It's going to be in April in Seattle so we are pretty confined to indoor events unfortunately.I don't know what will draw people to the party because let's face it most people don't jump at the chance to come to a wedding reception no matter how much they love and adore you. It's important to my FH that people have a good time.Any ideas are welcome! Thanks for your help in advance...

erin_nj83

Well, your AHR should be whatever you want it to be.  We are thinking a fondue party (cheese, hot oil or broth, and chocolate) and wine tasting at our house (our AHR will be 20 people max as we are not from SC).  We are not dancers either so a dance floor and all the works does not make sense for us.  We are thinking of a sophisticated party where people mingle and enjoy food.  SrgtEriksWife did a luau (she is mainly on the North Dakota nest board now), so you could ask her how she did her party. I know she had a station for people to make leis.  If you did a luau, then you could roast a pig, have dancers, and make some leis.  Good luck.

drm6285

How about doing a "happy hour" party where instead of a heavy buffet, you do heavy hors d'oeuvres  and desserts/cake; and obviously extend it to more like 3 hours.  You could try and incorporate your fave foods (i.e. if we end up doing this we would have to have mini hamburgers to symbolize FI's fave)That might help cut down on the cost and give you extra mulah to spend on some entertainment.  And instead of a full open bar, what about personalized cocktails and then beer and maybe wine?  I went to a wedding recently where they had a "bridal party menu" and there was a special drink for every member of the bridal party, it was really cute!

NYHarleyBride

Honestly, as a guest at an AHR, I would much rather attend something like you described (3-4 hour brunch, cake, etc), especially for a couple that has already had a destination wedding, than a bg splashy over the top wedding. It's just too much. Also, not sure where the idea of people not wanting to come to a weddign reception came from. In my experience, people who love and are happy for you will want to come to your AHR, no matter what type of event or venue it is. I would not feel that you need to have a side show to get them there. In fact, I think it takes away from the occasion. The whole idea is that they are coming to celebrate YOU.