Bridal shower....is this tacky!?

Mistym05

My MOH suggested that instead of doing a HM registry due to all the fees we should make separate containers and label them like....hotel, activities etc. So maybe have 4 separate containers and then let people chose where they r putting the money to "contribute" to our honeymoon. I personally see this as really really tacky and almost rude! MOH thinks this is an awesome idea and I'm not sure how well it will turn out and if anyone will get offended by it! Colin and I have talked so much about it because we don't need/have room in our apartment for anything! I don't even know what to do! Suggestions appreciated!

sarlah

Well yes, asking for money can be tacky and seen as rude. BUT on the other hand, it's a different story if it's not you asking for it. If it's your bridal party / mom doing this, it's not the same. If you decide to go ahead with it, make sure your MOH / bridesmaids / mom spread the word that you guys don't need anything for your home but could really use some help with the honeymoon. Some people will like it and some won't, but I'm sure you've already encountered that with the whole DW thing anyway Can't make everyone happy! You have to do what you think is the best for you.

FutureMrs.McC

I agree with you, it's really rude to ask for cash.  I think Honeyfund doesn't charge all of the crazy fees.  Also, you might not want to have a shower at all if don't want actual gifts.  I'm in the same boat as you but finally broke down and registered to upgrade some of our things.  Or what about some sort of theme.  Like a honeymoon shower.  You do the honeymoon registry and then people could give you lingerie or other stuff for the honeymoon.

alisonpilgrim610

I know this is kinda not related, but I had a friend who had a "gift card" shower. She didn't want to register, so the bridal party put in the invite something like "gift cards only for..." and list the stores.

LadyBird9

I agree 100% with you. I am not a big fan of this idea... If you don't want actual gifts, I wouldn't do a traditional shower. Ya know? I am going to keep thinking about this and if I come up with any ideas I will let you know!

captainleela

Not a fan of the idea. I would probably think it was uber tacky if I went to a shower and saw that, and I would also keep my money. Honeyfund.com doesn't charge fees. I would go that route instead.

captainleela

As an aside, you might want to consider registering for a few tangible items. Not everyone is going to love the idea of a HM registry and will want to buy you and actual gift instead. If you haven't registered for anyting, they will pick something on their own. Not only that, but not everyone will do their registry shopping online. Some people, particularly older folks, will want to go into the store to get you something. I guarantee you will get gifts whether you register for them or not. Just a thought.

Marci17154

Instead of doing a traditional shower why don't you ask them to make it a Lingerie Shower. You could have them include your sizes instead of a registry and that way you will end up with tons of fun stuff that wont take up much space... and will come in handy for your HM. HTY

MissMex

i think marci's got a good idea there. Otherwise, you really should not be having a shower. and I agree the bins of $ is tacky. Its actually the tackiest thing I've ever heard of at a shower. I know this is harsh, but I would feel so uncomfortable if your bridal party asked me to contribute to something like this. You don't have to have a shower that focuses on monatary gifts, you could have a recipe shower where guests write down their favorite recipies in a book for you, or hoe about a memory shower- have people share their favorite memory of you or FI and have someone write them all down.