Destination Weddings Discussions

Apologizing in advance for the (long) vent..

I really try to stay upbeat and positive, especially on this board, but I've really got to get this off my chest--my family stinks.  They have this way of taking my happiness and just pulverizing it.  

Case and point, I naturally called my dad yesterday to tell him I got a job.  And not just a job, but my dream job, with a dream offer, where my little sister is going to school.  I couldn't ask for a better way to start my professional career.  I even told him that I thought part of why I got the job offer so much sooner was because of his suggestions and his advice regarding how to handle the interview process.  What'd I get in response?  "You didn't tell them you were getting married, did you?"  I barely got a congratulations, let alone any amount of enthusiasm.  Even quoting the price tag didn't get him excited.  Nor did explaining that FI's already looking to transfer to another office in Burlington so we'll both be all set when we get there.  Nothing.  "Well, I don't think you should tell them, you should just make something up about how you liked it when you got there so much that you decided to elope, blahblahblahblahblah."  Yes, have my first conversation with my new employer be a blatant lie, brilliant idea.

This just makes me want to scream.  I can FINALLY be happy and excited and enjoy my life--enjoy my WEDDING--and this is the reaction I get.  I got more enthusiasm from YOU all, and I've never even MET you!!  It just makes me so angry.  And naturally, he shook me up so much being just mean on the phone, bringing up any sliver of negativity he could think of, that I haven't been able to get it out of my head.  This is what I've been working my @ss off for and miserable over during the last 2-6 years (depending on how you want to calculate it, hah).  I am seeing the fruits of my labor, and my family can't be happy for me.  

This is, of course, not an isolated incident.  It's been a whole life of never living up to my family's expectations when all I've tried to do is work hard, be a good person, and live a life where I can be happy.  To them, there's always something bigger, something better that I could and should be doing.  I am so pissed that his comments have, in part, robbed me of that initial feeling of awe and relief that I felt yesterday.  It's an even bigger embarrassment because, of course, FI's family is nothing but ecstatic and congratulatory and happy for us.  Why can't my dad and other members of MY family support me?

And I, of course, invited my dad to the wedding to try to be the better person.  What a crock.  

Sigh.. I feel a little better now, haha.

Thank you all so much for your congratulations and support.  It's nice to know that SOMEONE out there thinks I'm doing a good job, even if I've never met any of you.  I hate that this is getting to me, but I am getting really tired of having my dad raining on my parade whenever I reach a new milestone.  And I'm supposed to see him this weekend, blugh.  I just want to go to game night, lol.
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