Parent gift question

breaness

I'm struggling to find gift ideas for the male parents (my dad, FI's dad & FI's stepdad) as it seems everyone else is... but I'm also kind of struggling with the idea of giving a nice gift to FI's dad & GF.

We paid for his entire trip to Hawaii in full as well as the cost of his girlfriend (who we have only met once and are not crazy about) to go since he can't afford it. 

I designed a set of custom rings for my mom and me to present to her before the wedding, and I plan to do something extra special for my dad, FI's mom & FI's stepdad. Although we paid for the entire wedding/honeymoon ourselves, my parents are paying for our at-home reception and FI's mom & stepdad gave us $4k to use towards wedding related costs (rings, dress, invites, and other various odds&ends). For that reason, I think it's fair and a nice gesture to get them each a gift that costs somewhere around $100-250. But something just doesn't feel right about spending that much on his Dad and GF when we've already spent a couple thousand to get them there.

I love his Dad and I would love to get him something, but is it acceptable to spend less on a gift for him? Also, are we obligated to get something for his GF too?

waterous.m

Honestly I think paying for their travel is beyond what you need to give his as a gift. I would just get him a card and write something really nice and say that you are happy you were able to have him at the ceremony.

aukelly

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_parent-gift-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Theme%20BoardsForum:54Discussion:ea5f29f4-d6a1-4c71-b048-98eac8bd0d46Post:32db9ead-5e93-4ddb-a49d-1931f3ec3c65">Re: Parent gift question</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly I think paying for their travel is beyond what you need to give his as a gift. I would just get him a card and write something really nice and say that you are happy you were able to have him at the ceremony.
Posted by waterous.m[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree with this.  I am struggling with what to get my parents.  They haven't contributed anything at all (and I know they don't have to) but FI's parents have sent us a bit of money each month for our "wedding fund" and they paid for our honeymoon.  So I feel like their gift should def be something more substantial.  And probably something we will give them in private. </div>

breaness

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_parent-gift-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Theme%20BoardsForum:54Discussion:ea5f29f4-d6a1-4c71-b048-98eac8bd0d46Post:3a81744a-71a7-4d87-8fed-777dea9402f0">Re: Parent gift question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Parent gift question : I agree with this.  I am struggling with what to get my parents.  They haven't contributed anything at all (and I know they don't have to) but FI's parents have sent us a bit of money each month for our "wedding fund" and they paid for our honeymoon.  So I feel like their gift should def be something more substantial.  <strong>And probably something we will give them in private. </strong>
Posted by aukelly[/QUOTE]

<div>I keep forgetting that this is an option. That's probably the best way to avoid any awkwardness with this.</div>

sparklegirl84

Side question: For those of you who have received money from parents to help fund the wedding, do you give them a Thank you card now or after the wedding? Both his parents and mine have contributed but we haven't given either of them an official thank you yet, is it better to do it sooner or after the wedding along with the other thank yous?

aukelly

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_parent-gift-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Theme%20BoardsForum:54Discussion:ea5f29f4-d6a1-4c71-b048-98eac8bd0d46Post:ebbfe356-2cc9-4352-bdc3-bd7aca8ada8e">Re: Parent gift question</a>:
[QUOTE]Side question: For those of you who have received money from parents to help fund the wedding, do you give them a Thank you card now or after the wedding? Both his parents and mine have contributed but we haven't given either of them an official thank you yet, is it better to do it sooner or after the wedding along with the other thank yous?
Posted by sparklegirl84[/QUOTE]

<div>Since FI's mom has been sending us stuff each month, the gift at the wedding will be a thank you then.  I can't remember if I sent her a card the first time but since they've made this a habit I'm not going to write numerous thank yous.  Although I probably should have for the honeymoon money.  That's why I want to do something really nice for them.</div><div>
</div><div>And Brea I would just do gifts in private.  That way no one gets their feelings hurt. </div>

sld0618

In Response to <a href="http://destination.weddings.com/Sites/weddings/Pages/main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_parent-gift-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Theme BoardsForum:54Discussion:ea5f29f4-d6a1-4c71-b048-98eac8bd0d46Post:ffe43339-c42d-488f-aa8a-4756116b2e14">Re: Parent gift question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Parent gift question : I keep forgetting that this is an option. That's probably the best way to avoid any awkwardness with this.
Posted by breaness[/QUOTE]

The whole private thing is key.  I'm thinking a card and maybe a nice frame ($30-$50).  They're having sales at Things Remembered right now!  Paying for their trip is huge, but I think a frame would be perfect because I'm sure he would put up a picture of your ceremony, ya know?  Something little so it's not just a card.  I wouldn't get the GF anything.

breaness

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_parent-gift-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Theme%20BoardsForum:54Discussion:ea5f29f4-d6a1-4c71-b048-98eac8bd0d46Post:80cb88d6-4a9e-4215-8ece-62b321f2d926">Re: Parent gift question</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Parent gift question : The whole private thing is key.  I'm thinking a card and maybe a nice frame ($30-$50).  <strong>They're having sales at Things Remembered right now! </strong> Paying for their trip is huge, but I think a frame would be perfect because I'm sure he would put up a picture of your ceremony, ya know?  Something little so it's not just a card.  I wouldn't get the GF anything.
Posted by sld0618[/QUOTE]

<div>Great suggestion! :) Thanks!</div>