Friday Confessions

lv2011

WR: I'm starting to get seriously frustrated with the church and it's process to get married. Well, for me to get married (since I was previously). It really sucks to be told that I'm constantly living in sin and shouldn't be doing x,y, and z. I know I chose the faith, but I'm not convinced that means I have to agree with all of it. Does anyone? Some days after talking to these people, I really feel like giving up. I won't, but it's tempting.

NWR: I really don't want to go to FI's nephew's birthday party tomorrow. I can't stand his SIL that's going to be there. And even though I really like his sister, she has intentions of asking me about showers and such and FI and I already said we don't want any. I've got some social anxiety issues and I have a feeling I'll get bowled over by her and everyone else. I know FI would speak up on my behalf if I felt uncomfortable, but I really just don't want to go.

[Deleted User]

So are they telling you, you shouldn't get married again, but they will marry you anyway?

lv2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_friday-confessions-8?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:0112e5d2-b3c6-41a4-8cbc-512e9b01c41cPost:260a29d7-7323-432e-af3d-3b31b63a13de">Re: Friday Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]So are they telling you, you shouldn't get married again, but they will marry you anyway?
Posted by stephdi7971[/QUOTE]
 It's a Catholic thing. I have to have the previous marriage annuled before FI and I can get married in the church. I'm most of the way through the process, so I'm not worried (anymore), but I still get the ocassional "you're not supposed to be living tgether or planning a wedding" blah, blah, blah. Akmost everyone I've dealt with thus far has been really great and understanding. But this new lady is a real pill. It's people like her that make others run in the opposite direction of the church. I just have to suck it up and deal with it.

mrshall1027

LV that sucks. I was previously married in the church and I knew right away I wouldn't ever go through that. You are brave and I commend you for doing it all. Just hang in there and I'm sure it will all be worth it in the end.

lv2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_friday-confessions-8?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:0112e5d2-b3c6-41a4-8cbc-512e9b01c41cPost:7bb0e7f9-9e59-4828-a324-f3365a1ba735">Re:Friday Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]LV that sucks. I was previously married in the church and I knew right away I wouldn't ever go through that. You are brave and I commend you for doing it all. Just hang in there and I'm sure it will all be worth it in the end.
Posted by ystaalenburg[/QUOTE]

Thanks :)

[Deleted User]

I hate the whole, you are sinning and going to hell thing. It just doesn't seem fair. Is it better for God and your faith to stay with somebody who doesn't make you happy and suffer for the rest of your life, or to realize that things are not working and move on. I thought the basic idea was to love and be loved and if that is not happening in the relationship that you are in then you shouldn't have to stay. Besides not all situations are the same and some relationships can be abusive or one spouse cheats and then the other has to suffer and be labeled a sinner because of the other person's actions, again not fair. I grew up Catholic and while I enjoy the Mass and the ceremony, I really had a hard time with the rules. In order for my Dad to remarry he had to get the marriage annulled and when you do that with 2 kids and 17 years of marriage you are basically saying you never loved the person and therefore the kids. I now have a great relationship with my Dad but that was a tough and I think unnecessary thing to do.