How to handle...

Alisha9544

So we didn't invite every last family member to the wedding.  We had the parents give us lists for the families.  My FI's mom didn't include any cousins as they havesn't seen nor talked to them in years.  Well an Aunt posted on our Guestbook Wall asking if cousins were invited cause their names weren't on her invite(which they don't live at home so why would they be)  and that she had asked his Mom & she said no, but are we inviting them or not.  For 1 I find this extremely rude, & kind of embarrassing that its on our Guestbook wall!  But how do I politely handle this?  I did oops a little cause I've never met them & when I had done the save the dates it said "Mr & Mrs. X & Family".  Because of this should we invite the cousins?  Our guest list is close to Max for the venue & we are having a hard time with catering.

islandmonkey8

I hate to say this, because my guest list is also at its max with family cut off too, but I think if you accidently included them on the STD you have to invite them. I'm pretty sure this is the case. Sorry you're in this situation!

ericaandtom2012

Unfortunately, if you included them on the STD, you have to send them an invitation.  It is awkward she wrote it on your guestbook wall - can you delete it so everyone else doesn't see it and think the same thing?

Alisha9544

I hope I can delete it!  But idk if I can.  I may be sounding stupid here but wouldn't "& family" pertain to those who are at that address?  These are her kids that are adults married with children & not living at home.  I did say yes that it was ok but they need to RSVP if they're coming so that I can include them into the counts.  

Alisha9544

thank goodness it's deleted! 

tamrahelmer

This is a hard one. If you did send an STD to them, they definitely should be invited to the wedding. However, you bring up a good point that it was sent to the Aunt and Uncle & Family who live at that address. I think you are going to have to make the final call on what you feel is appropriate here for your own situation.

We are at our max too so its pretty hard. FI grandmother called last week and asked if HER siblings and significant others were invited. When she found out they weren't, she threw a fit. These are people who we have seen only once in three years and are really to distant, so we've explained to her it can't be done.

Good luck!

Stina2012

I think "& Family" can mean...well anything. It's pretty vague, although I would interpret it as "& my Kids". So, I can see how she's confused, but she got an answer from FI's Mom and to post on the Guestbook is weird.

I'd have FI or FI's Mom call her back and say "sorry for the confusion, but the kids/cousins are not invited".