This weekend, we met with our officiant (family friend) to finalize our ceremony. We wrote the ceremony ourselves, and have put a lot of thought into it. Looking at all of it together brought a tear to my eye! I love that it's a reflection of us! I included our ceremony below in case anyone else who is writing their own is still looking for ideas.
Also, Sunday night I got to Skype into my ceremony musicians' rehearsal. My 3 cousins are playing violin (they are also bridesmaids) and they have a friend who is playing cello. All of the songs sound AMAZING, and it was the first time I got to hear our recessional song. You may remember that my cousin was working on getting an arrangement of I'm Yours / Somewhere Over the Rainbow from one of her music professors. The song sounds really, really great and defininitely does not seem out of place with the rest of the classical music in our ceremony. It actually sounds exactly like this You Tube video (LINK) except it's a string quartet instead of an a capella version.
Wedding Ceremony
Prelude
Processional
Grandmothers
Parents of Groom
Bridesmaids & Ring Bearer
Bride
Welcome
First Reading -
i carry your heart with me e.e. cummings
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
not fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
Definition of Marriage
You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks – all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will and you will and we will”- those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe”- and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “ You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed- well, I meant it all, every word.” Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another- acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this- is my husband, this- is my wife. – Robert Fulghum
INTENTION
As we gather here to join Nicole and Christopher in marriage, it is fitting that you, the families and friends of Nicole and Christopher be here to witness and to participate in their wedding, for the ideals, the understanding and the mutual respect which they bring to their marriage have their roots in the love, friendship, and guidance you have given them.
They will need your love and respect in the future as well as on this happy day. As our sons and daughters, our friends and family find partners and found homes for the next generation, each family is enriched and enlarged. Do you, who have nurtured these two, bestow your blessing on their union and their new family?
“WE DO”
Nicole and Christopher, Please face each other."
Christopher -- are you ready to enter into this marriage with Nicole, believing the love you share and your faith in each other will endure all things?"
"I am."
Nicole -- are you ready to enter into this marriage with Christopher, believing the love you share and your faith in each other will endure all things?"
"I am."
Will you please join your hands
Vows
Please step forward and extend your hands, each to the other.
The hand offered by each of you is an extension of your self, just as is your mutual love. Cherish the touch, for you touch not only your own, but another life
The pledges you will now repeat are a statement of present intent and commitment. They cannot endure unless you make them endure, with the resources you will draw from deep within yourselves.
May this be but the beginning of a relationship that will grow and mature with each passing year until the latter days become the promise of the first.
I, Christopher, choose you Nicole to be my wife. I will respect you, care for you, grow with you through good times and hard times as your friend, companion and partner, giving the best that I can, to fulfill our lives together
I, Nicole, choose you Christopher, to be my husband. I will respect you, care for you, grow with you through good times and hard times as your friend, companion and partner, giving the best that I can, to fulfill our lives together
Second Reading - Irish Blessing
May your mornings bring joy and your evenings bring peace.
May your troubles grow few as your blessings increase.
May the saddest day of your future
Be no worse than the happiest day of your past.
May your hands be forever clasped in friendship
And your hearts joined forever in love.
May God be with you and bless you
May you see your children's children
May you be poor in misfortunes,
Rich in blessings
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward
Exchange of Rings
It is a custom to exchange rings as a symbol of love.
As the rings have no end so your love should have no end.
A circle is the symbol of the sun and the earth, and of the universe. It is a symbol of wholeness, and perfection, and of peace. The rings you give and receive this day, then, are symbols of the circle of shared love into which you enter together as husband and wife.
Christopher - what token do you give that you will perform your vows?
Nicole, do you receive this ring in token of the same?
"I do."
Nicole - this ring I give to you, in token and pledge
of my constant faith and abiding love.
Nicole - what token do you give that you will perform your vows?
Christopher, do you receive this ring in token of the same?
"I do."
Christopher - this ring I give to you, in token and pledge
of my constant faith and abiding love.
Third Reading: Polish Blessing
May your heart be as patient as the earth, your love as warm as harvest gold.
May your days be full, as the city is full, Your nights as joyful as dancers.
May your arms be as welcoming as home.
May your faith be as enduring as God's love. Your spirit as valiant as your heritage.
May your hand be as sure as a friend.
Your dreams as hopeful as a child.
May your soul be as brave as your people, and may you be blessed.
Unity Ceremony
This unity candle ceremony signifies the heritage each is bringing to the marriage and the blending of these two heritages.
Our community is shared, if in a different way, by those who have left this life. Their roles in the lives of Nicole and Christopher are no less remembered and honored as we savor today's joyous moments. Join with us, then, in fond memory of all these people.
In all the quiet of this very special moment, we pause, also, to give thanks for all the rich experiences of life that have brought Nicole and Christopher to this high point in their lives. We are grateful for the values which they have found by their own strivings. We are grateful that within them is the dream of a great love and the resources to use that love in creating a home that shall endure.
We are especially grateful for the values which have flowed into them from those who have loved them and nurtured them and pointed them along life's way. The heritage each brings to this marriage will continue to be an important element in their lives, but now will be shared between them.
In commemoration of the merging of these two rich heritages and in memory of those, living and dead, who were part of these heritages, I now invite Teresa, Nicole’s mother and Cathy , Christopher’s mother to bring forth lighted candles, representing each of the families of this couple.
Ava Maria starts playing
Nicole and Chris will now light a unity candle - symbolizing the union of their two families in this marriage and the rich heritage each brings to it.
As Nicole and Chris light the candle, they do not extinguish their flames. Although they are embarking upon a new and unique relationship in the union of their lives in marriage, they, nonetheless, retain their own separate and unique identities and personalities.
Fourth Reading: Italian Blessing - Translated into Italian
May your home be filled with laughter and the warm embrace of a summer day.
May you find peacefulness and beauty, challenge, and satisfaction,
humor and insight, healing and renewal, love and wisdom, as in a quiet heart.
May you always feel that what you have is enough.
There are three beautiful things in life: birth, love and this day.
Best wishes and good fortune to you, Nicole and Christopher,
for all your life."
Closing
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage the little things are the big things...
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
it should continue through all the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude
of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciation
and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience,
understanding and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal,
dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.
It is discovering what marriage can be, at its best.
- by Wilferd Arlan Peterson
Declaration of Marriage
You have spoken your promises. You have exchanged the signs of your commitment each to each. It is thus with great pleasure that I declare that you have married each other in the presence of these witnesses, and you are now husband and wife.
Christopher and Nicole, from this day forward your lives shall be woven of one design, and your perils and your joys shall not be apart. As you increase in love and understanding, may you joys stand victoriously against the storm of circumstances that beats impartiality on all of our doors. From the rich encouragement of your affection, may you be inspired to open your doors to the needs you perceive in the world. In the embrace of mutual respect, may you each complete the unfinished pattern of your true selves. Let the passing of the days and the years deepen the love of your union and make it full of tenderness and grace.
May you strive all of the rest of your lives to meet this commitment to each other with the same love and devotion that you now possess. Now since you have publicly promised your commitment to each other for all time., I call upon all gathered here to witness, that according to the laws of New York, you are now husband and wife. You may now seal this ceremony with a kiss. .
Introduction of Newlyweds -
Recessional