October 2012 Weddings

to late to fire Bridesmaid?

So I've been having drama with this one bridesmaid since May.  And today she just pushed me over the link.. soooo irritated!!!   So my girls are having black dresses because the dress I picked looked best in black and they wanted it in black, (well the other two who have been helpful).  So I still was hoping for a pop of color so I was hoping the girls would wear pink (fushia).  So one was completely on board the other sort of but has gotten on board and then well this one didn't ever put her opinion in.  So I was sort of leaning towards just not worrying about the shoes because I'm getting sick of the drama but then she texts everyone that her friend got a job at zappos so we'd get a discount on shoes for everyone. So that makes me think she's on board.  So I go online and find a bunch of shoes for them to choose from on zappos and DSW.  My one friend says she likes the DSW ones better and wants to keep it around $50, ok sounds good.  The difficult one emails me that she hates them all and doesn't really even want to spend money on shoes she'll never wear again.  WTF!! Then why even send out that text! And seriously if she didn't want to be such a B she could have said I don't really like those but how about these...instead she just says she hates them all. Argh..last straw.. now I'm worries she's going to be all pissing at the bachelorette party and the wedding and difficult to be around and its just going to be akward as well. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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Re: to late to fire Bridesmaid?

  • Are the dresses short? Why don't you bring color in with the flowers. I think you should let them wear whatever shoes they want.
  •  I think unless you are paying for the shoes, you should let them wear the shoes they want. Maybe just decide on the colour, and then they can choose their own from there. Maybe the shoes can be the pop of colour.
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  • I agree that if you're requiring them to wear fuschia shoes, you need to buy them. The BM may now not be able to afford them. I probably wouldn't want to spend 50 on a pair of shoes that I would never wear again either. I agree with the PP to do the pop of color as the flowers.
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  • I'm not requiring them to wear shoes.. honestly that's not my biggest issues with this..if they were that against wearing the shoes then I wouldn't make them wear then and I've been back and forth with my other 2 bridesmaids regarding the shoes.. my issue is the way she's handling the situation. She could have said nicely that she would really prefer to not have to buy pink shoes instead of saying she hated them and hates the bridesmaid dresses and is honestly just quite bitter about my whole wedding.  It's honestly more that it's the last straw about her bitterness.  We picked bridesmaid dresses then she decided she didn't like them so we went shopping again but then refused to go shopping with us so I choose without her. She then has become quite negative about the whole wedding and anything wedding related and is just turning into a terrible friend.
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  • shoebieshoebie member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited August 2012
    Wow just wow. So let me get this straight someone you love and care about enough to ask to stand up for you the day you make the biggest commitment of your life you want to "fire" over shoes and dresses ?! TK never seems to amaze me. 
  • wow seriously?! I understand it's hard for things to come through correctly but you don't need to be mean either.  My friend yes was one of my best friends but since may turned into a major negative nancy.  Hating everything wedding related, telling me that FI and I were going to get divorced that we don't handle or finances the way suzy orman says we should and that decisions I have made in regards to our relationship aren't the correct ones and has been nothing but difficult.  So quite honestly when she tells me she "hates" the shoes, instead of offering to find another option or being helpful at all or just telling me that she's just not feeling it then yes that does become the last straw to me.  when you put up with enough garbage after a while something like telling me you "hate" it with complete attitude does really piss me off and when I'm already at on witts end with her it does make me want to just be done.
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