Anyone else...

aimee58

feeling the stress? Like majorly?

We decided to do the bach party on 10/20, the weekend before the wedding. I think it will be nice to get out that weekend and enjoy myself and not just stay home panicking.

FI and I got into a tiff yesterday b/c he doesn't want me out of commission the week before the wedding. We'll have a lot to do (really only getting the carmel apple favors in their bags and tied). But after talking he admitted that it's just getting to him and he doesn't feel like he wants a big wedding and he doesn't want a bachelor party and we should just do the courthouse etc

The wedding will have a lot of guests, but as far as decor/projects go it's all done except for favors, which we can't do until wedding week. He's a pretty quiet guy and I think the idea of all the attention on him is just starting to sink in. I just don't know what to say to him. I really want a wedding wedding, or I think I'll regret just doing a courthouse. We already invited all of our people and he hasn't said a word until last night. I'm hoping it's just a little panic attack and will calm down. yikes.

Anyone else in this boat??

tracey525

Um, YES! I posted something similar this morning (click here to join the rant).

The sheer quantity of "little things" are beginning to freak me out...

NRod70

I was a few months back when I actually sat down and was number crunching.  That's the only thing that was freaking me out.  Other than that, no.  We both have waited a long time for a wedding...we're both 40 and never thought we would ever be married.  You hear often about guys freaking out as you get close to the date (cold feet, I guess, but i don't like that term) and I think that's perfectly normal.  You're about to go through this huge, major change in your life!  

So, with that being said, I don't know what you should say specifically to your FI because I don't know him, but...you can always do what I do with my kid, I mean FI, just agree with him only to the point of "ok, I see what you're saying...you don't have to have a bach party and will talk about the courthouse thing".  And kinda wait til it blows over, when he calms down a bit.  If he doesn't want the party, don't "make" him and let him cool down about the big wedding.  You know he just nervous, otherwise he would have never asked you to marry him!

This works like a charm for me everytime.  I let him *think* he's the boss and then go do what I was gonna do anyway and he's none the wiser! 

Good luck and I know you two will be just fine!

aimee58

Thanks! I think it all started b/c we had dinner with his parents last night and his mom talks about the wedding nonstop! That always gets him a little stressed. He's also meeting with his boss today about a possible promotion, which is also added stress. I think he's just frazzled in general right now. I'm giving him some time to blow off steam and let him relax. He's also supposed to call his best man to talk about the bach party today and I'm sure that will help.

NRod70

Yeah, once he talks to another guy, I'm sure he'll be fine.  Especially one that would be pumped up about the wedding like the BM.

[Deleted User]

We are (hopefully) going for Tux this weekend and I'm thinking this might send FI over the edge!

mmmendi

I am so with you!

FI and I have had a number of disagreements - Friday over $ (worked through), Saturday night over his daughter (worked through), this morning over last night's discussion that his BM just decided they should make a week-end bachelor party out of it in New Orleans (not sure where we are on that one!) and he said HE IS STRESSED. We finally printed the invitations yesterday, he totally reworded it - it wasn't offensive, the information is there so no big deal (and I did a 2nd 'fun' one for a few select friends of mine) but on our RSVP cards the printer kept throwing them crooked and he just really went over the top frustrated and wedding is too stressful and blah - and I literally thought "dude, all YOU have to do is print!" LOL

I have no doubt that this is a stressful time for ALL of us! We are counting down though, more things are done, so as much as there is to do - it is less than before.

nani1012

I feel you in a sense. FI is stressing since all eyes will be on us. He's not one who likes being the center of attention. He is already freaking out a lil' since he has to take pictures ( he hates getting pics done) and also he agreed to a first dance with me. He doesn't want to do one with his mom....but I think she's expecting one. I told him he has to talk to her since it's not my battle. So...we'll see how that goes.