I am trying my best to hold it together, as I am still at work, but I know the second I am in my car I am either going to cry or scream.
My mom said she had X amount of money to give us for the wedding, use as you wish. FMIL orignally just wanted to pay for the RD, which was fine. After finding out how much my mom was giving us, she decided she would match that (FI told his mom what my mom was giving - I was not happy about it bc it wasnt her business, but oh well, what's done is done). So, they each agreed to pay for the wedding, equally. They each offered the same amount. I just want to reiterate that I am very very thankful for this - it was unexpected, appreciated and I am truly truly from the bottom of my heart thankful.
My mom's "portion" of the wedding is pretty much all allocated. She paid for my dress, the big deposits and will be paying for the entire reception. So that leaves FMIL...
For the last two or three weeks I have been dripping very subtle hints whenever she asks me about the wedding/if I need help/etc. I give her just about the same response every single time: "No things are pretty much planned out, but we really need to start paying some of the balances off." I have literally said some sort of variation of this 15-20 times in the last month. Finally, I decided FI needs to ask her about it, he says, not a problem. I emailed him the spread sheet of who has paid what, what needs to be paid, etc so he had it all in black in white and I highlighted what his mom should pay.
Fast forward to an hour ago. I get a message from FI "mom is so hard to deal with sometimes." Uh oh. Yep, now FMIL says, and I quote "does amanda not know that the mother of the groom is only suppose to pay for the rd" What? Yes I know that! You offered! And I planned around the budget that the two of them gave me. Now she is, as FI put it, playing the victim. Her favorite role. And I am the bad guy. Her favorite role for me to be in. Supposedly she is writing the checks, which is good I guess. But I have a feeling that this money is going to come with strings (not necessarily wedding strings either).
ALSO, she didn't even get us a card for the shower. Not even a card, no congrats or good luck or anything!! She basically sat in the kitchen the whole time and secluded herself. My mom, aunt, FSIL, and I tried to make her feel included, but sometimes there is only so much you can do I guess.
URRGGHHH why now? I would have budgeted for a smaller affair if I knew things would end up like this.