1st Meeting with Priest- any advice?

robije7

FI and I have our 1st meeting with the Church tonight and I have NO idea what to expect.  Anyone else getting married in a church have any advice? Are there certain questions I should be asking or anything I should be prepared to answer?

I feel like I'm more nervous than I should be because I haven't attended church regularly in years so I want to be prepared

NRod70

I'm afraid I won't be too much help because I'm not Catholic.  However, we are getting married in my church (I haven't attended regularly for years) and we have already had 3 sessions with my pastor.  All I can say is, I was waayyyy more nervous than I needed to be.  I'm not sure what they do in other churches...my pastor is also a marriage counselor and alot of what we talked about is more about the marriage itself than religion.  FI actually likes going, but we really like my pastor.

shoebie

Our meeting was very easy we have a few more to go to. Make sure you ask how strict they are with the photographer some churches make them pick a spot and stay others let them bounce all over etc...

snuff9861

Our first meeting went pretty well. If your meeting goes anything like mine, you'll fill out some paperwork basically ensuring that you're both free to marry and no one is being forced anything. Depending on how strict your priest is, he may go over restrictions or rules for your church. Each church is different. HTH.

MelyndaRyan

Our first session was really laid back. He just asked us about how we met, what we love about each other and about our families and other outside relationships. He have us the 5 love languages to read and we read and discussed a couple passages in the bible.

[Deleted User]

Do you and FI live together already? That was an issue for us with the first church we met with. We knew to expect it since we both grew up in church but were not treated with any sort of respect that I expected from a man of God. We found a church that better suits us and actually practices what it preaches. However, we don't meet with the pastor until August so I hope I haven't set my expectations too high yet again.

achiduck

I'm not catholic so I can only tell you what we've experience in the Lutheran church. We've had three meetings so far.

Meeting 1 - General "get to know you", talked about how we met, what we do, etc. The pastor went over what getting married in the lutheran church means, took down all the legal stuff she needs for the government filings, etc.

Meeting 2 - Talked about the 5 love languages, etc

Meeting 3 - Talked about what unwritten family rules/roles and baggage we might be brining into the relationship and fighting fair

At the fourth meeting we'll talk about the important stuff, having kids, money, etc. And a fifth meeting will happend once we have our marriage license to sort out the final details and confirm WP details, the ceremony details, readings, etc.

To be perfectly honest, based on what I've heard about catholic pre-marital counselling it doesn't sound so bad, but if you live together don't be surprised if they ask you to find alternative arrangements and/or stop having sex until the wedding.

aimee58

Our first meeting was mostly get-to-know you stuff too. Family names, background with the church, etc.

After that, we got sent to meet with our FOCCUS couple twice, then back with the priest to go over ceremony plans.

robije7

Thanks SO much for all the advice I actually feel so much better now. marelin87 No we don't live together but that's terrible you weren't treated right!
I'm sure it'll just be a "get to know you" type of thing but I wanted to check with everyone what their experience was first.  Again thanks!!