RD numbers

LDubHawksFan

How many are you having at yours??  FI and I need to discuss this more, and his mom is open to hosting as many as we really want, but it doesn't stop me from feeling a tad guilty, especially since my side is so large.  With just our WP, pastor, parents, siblings, neices & nephews, aunts and cousins (including SOs), we are at 54 people!!!  Even if we exclude my aunts & cousins that only drops the number by 7 (and his aunt and uncle are definitely being invited regardless).  His family makes up only 12 people vs the 26 for mine.  I don't know that there is much I could do, but should I offer to pay for my more extended family?!  I just want to get a gut check on what your numbers are because it shocked me when I counted it up!

violakat03

We are only having the BP and their immediate family, plus our parents. 31 total.

[Deleted User]

Well how many people are you having for your wedding. I'm having 75 and we have 33 for the RD, which includes family wedding party, which is only 2 and out of town guests. So like almost half!

xxjen015

We have WP, aunts and uncles, and a few OOT guests. If WP wants to bring a +1, they can, but most haven't reported bringing one. We're at 40, I believe. 

achiduck

We've invited 33 people including the WP and their SOs, immediate family, the pastor and her husband, the DOC and the few OOT family members that are flying in and staying at my father's place. Our sides for this are about 50/50 whereas the wedding guest list was 60/40 for me. 

Try not to feel bad about it, it is what it is. If you really feel the need to do something to alleviate your guilt you could offer to help cover the costs or if it's being hosted at her house help with some of the food prep.

huskerfan246

Since we have a really small wedding party we are at 15 total.

LDubHawksFan

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_rd-numbers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e657e6d2-0d84-4d14-ac79-b1163522e5faPost:13746cea-cd7f-43af-995f-744cb67b569d">Re: RD numbers</a>:
[QUOTE]Well how many people are you having for your wedding. I'm having 75 and we have 33 for the RD, which includes family wedding party, which is only 2 and out of town guests. So like almost half!
Posted by stephdi7971[/QUOTE]

The total guest count will probably be about 105 at the wedding, so about half!  I couldn't imagine not inviting my siblings, and eliminating my aunts & cousins really doesn't drop the numbers, but I also don't want to since they are all coming out from Iowa/Neb too.  No OOT friends are included (other than my BMs).  Maybe I'll ask FMIL if I can help with the costs since there are so many...

LDubHawksFan

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_rd-numbers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e657e6d2-0d84-4d14-ac79-b1163522e5faPost:60528d94-3a22-4d28-9dcf-38580b752192">Re: RD numbers</a>:
[QUOTE]We've invited 33 people including the WP and their SOs, immediate family, the pastor and her husband, the DOC and the few OOT family members that are flying in and staying at my father's place. Our sides for this are about 50/50 whereas the wedding guest list was 60/40 for me. <strong> Try not to feel bad about it, it is what it is.</strong> If you really feel the need to do something to alleviate your guilt you could offer to help cover the costs or if it's being hosted at her house help with some of the food prep.
Posted by achiduck[/QUOTE]

Thanks!  I'll try not to.  Heck, I'm not the one that chose to have a big splintered family!  Ultimately I think whether FILs let me contribute or not, I would look back some day and regret not inviting my aunts and cousins since we are close.

aro1589

We are around 30.
 FI, me, plus 12 WP = 14. 
My dad, mom, mom's husband, OOT grama, OOT aunt and uncle = 20. 
FI grandparents, his aunt and uncle (grama and aunt are doing readings) = 24
One groomsman is married so his wife = 25
FI parents (doubt they will come) = 27
Dad's best friend (who I call 'uncle', an OOTers) = 28

We rounded up to 30 incase anyone brings a date (don't think they will)

schnugglebug

Most of our poeple are not coming in till day off being an OOT wedding...
and my family is staying at a hotel NEAR the site not near our house... so I guess we are at maybe 15 (we are having a bbq at our place)

FI and Me
my son
Mom and bfnd
Fmil, FFIL
MOH and husband
FG's (2) and parents (2)

nitecheese

I think we're at 33, which includes parents, WP and their significant others and our siblings and their significant others.

THe closer we get, the more excited I am about the RD! 

catwine

I don't get why people are inviting aunts, uncles, OOT guests, etc....

i thought the RD was just for the people involved in the ceremony. for us it's our parents, WP, photographers, Pastor and pianist...so 16 including us.

nitecheese

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_rd-numbers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e657e6d2-0d84-4d14-ac79-b1163522e5faPost:baf16e31-5f59-4178-bfd7-2382bce36170">Re: RD numbers</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't get why people are inviting aunts, uncles, OOT guests, etc.... i thought the RD was just for the people involved in the ceremony. Posted by christinavy[/QUOTE]

That is what I thought, too.  It seems that my FMIL has other ideas.  Since she is paying for the RD, I don't get to complain, but I'm not exactly jazzed about it.

CandiceAdam

We will probably have 65 or so guests at the wedding and 28 -30 at the RD. Our wedding is OOT for everyone so anyone that has let me know that they will be there the night before the wedding was invited, they are traveling and I felt like it was appropriate to feed and host them as they came all that way just for us.

catwine

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_rd-numbers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e657e6d2-0d84-4d14-ac79-b1163522e5faPost:c2317d3f-fcff-49d9-adbf-03ee5bf8313b">Re: RD numbers</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: RD numbers : That is what I thought, too.  It seems that my FMIL has other ideas.  Since she is paying for the RD, I don't get to complain, but I'm not exactly jazzed about it.
Posted by JennaBirdTheBride[/QUOTE]

my FMIL offered to pay as well but I politely told her we don't want to do a "dinner" because the rehersal is on a Friday after we are all done work.  We'd rather just go home afterwards.

LDubHawksFan

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_rd-numbers?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e657e6d2-0d84-4d14-ac79-b1163522e5faPost:baf16e31-5f59-4178-bfd7-2382bce36170">Re: RD numbers</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't get why people are inviting aunts, uncles, OOT guests, etc.... i thought the RD was just for the people involved in the ceremony. for us it's our parents, WP, photographers, Pastor and pianist...so 16 including us.
Posted by christinavy[/QUOTE]

While I kind of agree, my whole family is traveling 2000 miles for the wedding and it will be the first time the families meet.  Given that I won't get a lot of time with them otherwise, I like the idea of having dinner with them.
I would never not include my siblings, and I can't expect them to find sitters in a new city, so neices and nephews across the board are 10 people there.  I personally don't care to include OOT guests like friends.  I've been invited to, but never attended iin those situations.

LoriMc12

Our number will be in the 50s because of our huge families and the few friends we have playing a role in our wedding.  FMIL is adding some of their friends that are coming from OOT but I doubt they will come since it would add a day onto their trip.  I don't really care how many people are on the list since we aren't paying for it!