Pennsylvania-Philadelphia

Completely crushed :( Long, sorry!

My fiance and I booked a fabulous honeymoon at the Sandals Royal Bahamian last May.  Since it was more than a year before the wedding we got AWESOME deals.  We are paying for our honeymoon, a portion of the wedding, and are looking into buying a house.  We've decided that we REALLY want to buy - not rent.  Now that we have spent a lot of time looking at the numbers, it's going to be a lot harder than anticipated.  With the honeymoon and airfare, we are looking at $6,000.  We are going to be busting our butts to come up with just that - it is going to be impossible to get together a down payment.   I looked into cancellations policies and it says that if you cancel within 45 to 39 days of the trip, all you need to forfeit is your deposit (which in this case is $400).  This is obviously further than 45 days, so I am wondering if we can get it all back.  Regardless, we are thinking that we need to call off the honeymoon.  We are both really upset, especially me. 

Is it crazy to do something like this?  I just feel like it's irresponsible to go on this elaborate trip if we can't even afford a home.  We did agree that either way we are taking that week off and spending it together (I teach so I am off then anyway).  A couple relatives have homes down the shore or in the Poconos so we are hoping we could maybe stay at their places (if they aren't rented).  Not sure yet.

I know this is long, but I am just so disappointed.  I feel like today is the day I officially became a "grown up."

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Re: Completely crushed :( Long, sorry!

  • edited December 2011
    I would say go for a honeymoon somewhere you want to go, but just do it more inexpensively than the 6k you originally budgeted.. 
  • angel33284angel33284
    100 Comments
    member
    edited December 2011
    Once you buy a home the odds of ever having a trip like this ever again decreases. Houses are a good investment but can also be a money pit. As soon as you fix one thing something else breaks.

    You're young and a mortgage is something you'll be paying on for 30 years. Will waiting one more year kill you? Just go on the honeymoon and have some fun. There's no rule that says you have to be responsible and turn into your parents right away. LOL
  • Stacylynn702Stacylynn702
    2500 Comments
    member
    edited December 2011
    You can definitely get a honeymoon for less than that.  How long were you planning on staying?  We're doing Sandals too. Did you use a TA?  You can PM me if you want the name of our travel agent.  Just page me on the board if you send a message.  She's awesome!
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  • edited December 2011
    Don't forget you'll most likely get a decent amount of money for wedding gifts.  We splurged on our honeymoon but were able to still get a down payment together (FHA is only 3.5%) because of our wedding gifts.  I agree with pps, once you have a house there will always be some kind of issue that sucks out your vacation budget. 
  • edited December 2011
    Can you re-work the honeymoon to reduce the cost?  Maybe a less expensive room option??  I don't think you should cancel your honeymoon just bec you can't afford a home - I would just rethink the amount you are spending.  LIke pp said, you will get some of the money you spend on the wedding back as gifts.

    If this were the criteria, I'm sure many of us wouldn't be going on honeymoons! 
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  • Amerbutt81Amerbutt81
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary
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    edited December 2011
    You really need to think about your priorities on this- what is more important to you?

    One of the first things we discussed when we got engaged was a honeymoon. 
    Our thought was that now is a really great time to buy a home, and we didn't want to rent any longer just to go on a vacation.  Those islands aren't going anywhere. 

    But we did promise ourselves that we would go away next October.  I think by picking a date, it's helping us to stick to our promise.
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  • Northstar1808Northstar1808
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments
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    edited December 2011
    I was in the same exact boat as you were. We bought a house and we didn't think we could go on a honeymoon at all. Our original plans were to go to Mexico and it was going to be $4k. After the wedding we realized we had enough money for a honeymoon but not for the same trip so we rebooked for another that was half the cost. So at least we can go on a honeymoon but we still get a house. You just have to remember that a house is way more important than one trip. It's hard to grasp and understand it but it really is.
  • lisalaroclisalaroc
    100 Comments
    member
    edited December 2011
    Thank you SO MUCH! I just wanted more opinons than my parents.  And of course, after spending more time thinking about it, I am a little more calm.

    We are going to try looking into something in the US and maybe less than a whole week.  We might just do down the shore for a week which is something neither of us have done in several years.

    If we do cancel this trip (which seems pretty likely), our plan is to join my family for a trip to Italy in 2013.  It is something my parents have talked about for a while and never made it around to doing - we are probably getting aunts, uncles, etc to go all for the first time.
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