Need help, Cake vs cake & cupcakes!

Valetta09

Hi!

So I need your help, my MOH made me feel terrible tonight about the choice I am leaning towards to keep myself under budget. I do not envision the wedding cake as the show piece of my wedding- to me it is the love that radiates between myself and my fiance and the warmth of our family surrounding us. That being said- we have chosen to keep a fairly simple wedding so that my parents can afford to provide multiple beach houses for our extended family, provide food the week of, and activities! To us, family is the best gift and we want to do everything we can to keep them close and comfortable.

Now that you have the background.

I explored doing cake for 50 people versus doing 1 small two tier cake(will serve about 25 people) and cupcakes.

The pricing goes from 5$ a person to 1.50 a person with the cupcakes. I was feeling good about the cake/cupcakes, had a layout plan. Even checked on cute :kiddie: cupcakes for the many children there as well that we could do in our colors with a cute beachy theme.

She then tells me she thinks it is tacky and how will I pick who eats wedding cake and who gets a cupcake. :shrug: I figured they pick what they want until it runs out. We are going to get extra cupcakes and also set up a desert table with canoli, pies, etc because it is our bestman's birthday and my aunt's. There will be lots of desert options....just hurt my feelings that although she was trying to :keep it real: she could have been more supportive in the way she shared her thoughts.

What do you all think? Is it too tacky? This is a laid back family wedding spread over a week not one shining night of festivities. I can't imagine my cousin going : ugh that sucked so bad i didn't cake a piece of cake , i had to eat a cupcake: (of the same exact cake/icing!) 

I look forward to hearing your thoughts, the trying to not be bummed out bride, Jessica

mparwulski

I think it's fine.  It actually gives people some variety.  Lots of people have chocolate cakes.  Me, probably wouldn't eat a piece.  The whole cupcake idea is a little newer and the older generations are just not familiar with it.  Actually, a lot of the kids probably prefer the cupcakes.

RussoWill

We are doing all cupcakes, with a little cake on top just for us.  At my cousin's wedding a few months ago, his wife's mom and aunt baked all of their cupcakes themselves to save monet. I think whatever dessert spread you have planned (I love cannolis!) will be perfect for your wedding.  You could also hilight the cupcakes by getting a cupcake tower or cute server tray.  I think it sould like a great money-saving idea.

mandafite821

I think it's a great idea!  Personally I would choose a cupcake over cake any day! 

Who doesn't love cupcakes?!!!

Scheff725

I agree with the PP's, its a great idea! We attended a wedding last year on the OBX and had to evacuate for Hurricane Earl. Because of the hurricane we could not pick up the wedding cake, so the bride bought cupcakes at the food lion and set it up in a cute way and EVERYONE loved it! It was a great idea and I plan to use the small cake top tier for FI and I and cupcakes for everyone else!

ldybug78

You MOH is crazy- I would choose a cupcake ANYDAY over cake.  Really, it is not tacky at all.  My favorite weddings are when there is more offered than just cake.  You are making the perfect choice and if it saves you money then even better!

hibiscus118

I think what you are doing sounds like a good plan

tcigal

DEFINITELY not tacky- cupcakes actually seem to be the "hot new things" and you see them all over in Bridal Magazines.  Maybe if you found one demonstrating this, it would make her feel better.  Either way, you're right: it's about you two and your family, so it doesn't matte!  Not to mention, it sounds like there will be PLENTY of dessert options and nothing will run out, so since everyone there are "big kids" they will have no problem chosing whichever they prefer.  I think it's great to give people options; not everyone is big on cake anyway.

Side Note- My mom has said a few things during this process that have hurt my feelings too, and she actually didn't even raelize, let alone intend to.  So I've gotten better about pointing it out, and she's been apologetic and has been working on avoiding donig the same thing the next time, so I'd let her know her comment did hurt your feelings a bit.

WhitKD711

I agree with all PP. It's not tacky at all! I'm actually thinking of doing the same thing, but my guest count is a lot higher than yours (about 140). I'm going to do a smaller 2 tier cake and then a bunch of cupcakes around it. Who cares what your MOH thinks anyways ...... it's YOUR wedding.

ms_teach

I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're doing either.  I think as long as you have them lay everything out and make it look like a display, it can really work.  It's not like you're serving them out of a cardboard box.

Valetta09

Thanks everyone! I do have a layout in my head and already have several of the pedestals, etc we will use to display everything! It just shocked me that she thought she was being helpful- and she is my age (27) and was just married last spring! I'm starting to think she is having trouble supportiving a frugalista wedding or the fact that I have 13 months to plan and she picked to only have four months. So much more detail and planning trips, etc can be incorporated when you have the time to do so. (Which she didn't with her busy work schedule, moving and less than 4 month notice).

:shrug: What can you do! Thanks again, I'm feeling better. I like that people will have options and if one runs out it runs out. That's the way it is.  Again they're mostly all famil or very close friends who aren't expecting a show!

Happy planning!