International couple, both Catholics, can't reserve a Church HELP!

grundercatz

Hey everyone!

I need some major major help here. This is what happened: fiance and I are getting married next January in Miami. Meanwhile, I am finihsing up school in Boston and he has graduated and moved to his home country. The wedding has to be in Miami because it is easiest for both families. We thought we had a church reserved, they told us the date was free and everything, so we sent out the necessary paper work to save a date, and lo and behold a month later they figure out that the date had been reserved a year ago but they forgot to transfer it from the priests calander to their calander. 

Unfortunately, we already have our reception venue booked and under contract with a hefty deposit down since the original church told us that the date was basically a sure thing.

Now we are left without a place to get married.

It seems that most churches require the bride and groomt to meet with them in person before being able to reserve the date. This is impossible for us. Yes, I will be in Miami for one week in March, but my fiance can't make it as he is working in another country and can't just get the time off and the money to come to Miami for one day. 

Is there anyone who knows what we can do? Has anyone ever been in this situation? What is a long-distance international couple supposed to do to get married in the church? (We met in college so it isn't like we have never been together in person, he just moved home). 

We want to have a Catholic ceremony. For us that is the whole point in getting married, but it is starting to feel like the Catholic Church doesn't want us.

 

Sorry this is so long, just feel like I've had a rug pulled out from under me.

Please help,

F

agapecarrie

There are several options. Who were you doing your marriage prep with? You can have him call a parish to schedule you. If you haven't started marriage prep, contact a local priest and explain the situation. Hopefully one will be willing to work with you with Skype. Another option is to have the church that dropped you do the calling since its on them. Another option is to change the time of your ceremony

monkeysip

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_international-couple-both-catholics-cant-reserve-a-church-help?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:05c793c8-42ba-4223-82f3-d73c0e01b738Post:b388f79d-3348-4ca1-8317-fbb6403a8ba7">Re:International couple, both Catholics, can't reserve a Church HELP!</a>:
[QUOTE]There are several options. Who were you doing your marriage prep with? You can have him call a parish to schedule you. If you haven't started marriage prep, contact a local priest and explain the situation. Hopefully one will be willing to work with you with Skype. Another option is to have the church that dropped you do the calling since its on them. <strong>Another option is to change the time of your ceremony</strong>
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

This is a good point.  A lot of reception venues will allow you to change your time, or sometimes even DAY, without losing a deposit.  Look into that with your original church.

I really hope you find something soon!  I know that must be very stressful!

lalaith50

Yes, I would try to see if you can change the time of the ceremony... maybe 11 am instead of 1 or 2 pm? But I'm surprised the church didn't mention that as a possibility. It definitely seems to me that since they're the ones that messed up, they should have to be more flexible. (Maybe even the other couple could be encouraged to be flexible? Most brides want their weddings *later* in the day, so maybe for example if you both were planning on having a 2 pm ceremony, the other couple could be asked to and allowed to move their ceremony to 2:30, and you could have yours at 12:30 or something like that?)

Then, if that can't be worked out, I definitely agree that the responsibility for calling should be on the church who messed up. I mean, you can try to contact other nearby churches yourself, but chances are they will say something like they don't do weddings for non-parishioners (or something like that), then I think you can talk to the original church and try to get them to do the calling and explaining for you.