Catholic Weddings
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Pre-cana and pregnant?

I am in the process of getting my annulment it should be done in a few weeks. Then I am wanting to get married. The know the pre-cana process takes a long time. However my FI is in another country Ghana to be exact. And we have to wait for immigration to send him a visa. Anyway after they send him and approve the fiancee visa we HAVE to marry in 90 days or he has to leave. So my question is can I have a short pre-cana instead of the 6 month that is shown through my archdiocese? And secondly, if I am pregnant before the wedding would I face rejection and ridicule from the church if I am pregnant with my first child before the marriage ceremony would they delay our marriage because of this?

Re: Pre-cana and pregnant?

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    Riss91Riss91 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you should contact a priest as soon as possible. I have seen situations where legal marriages have taken place and then a convalidation ceremony is done through the church to recognize the marriage at a later time. However, you will need to get approval for this as it is not always granted. I know that people who have had children have been able to get married in the church later on. Good luck!
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    Theresa626Theresa626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Most churches require six months from the time that you first contact them but not a six month pre cana period. So, contact a church and set a wedding date and schedule a pre cana weekend very close to that date as soon as you can.  Then do the pre cana within the ninety day period.  Pre cana probably won't take you more than three weekends.

    As far as being pregnant, I can't speak for every church or every person but my general experience of the pre cana retreat was that people were not religious fanatics and that they were generally accepting of other couples.  A lot of the couples on my retreat (most of them) were already living together so I doubt they might judge you.

    However, being pregnant is sometimes considered a special situation that needs a dispensation from the bishop.  The reason for this is because they want to make sure you're not getting married simply because you are pregnant if you and your fiance are not a good match or don't agree on a lot of issues.  They would probably just talk with you and make sure that your intentions for getting married are not based on your pregnancy.  Talk to your church right away to find out exactly what needs to happen. 
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    edited December 2011
    Definitely speak to your priest asap.

    i am here on a visa as well and I understand the time pressure.  However, you can marry by JOP and have a convalidation ceremony later on. As long as you work with your priest and he understands your motivations are purely forced by bureaucratic rules of this country, he will represent your case well in the archdiocese. 

    Just out of curiosity, how long have you been with your FI?  I am asking because if I were in your situation, I would wait till the baby comes.  Getting married in Church is a serious thing, at least for me.
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