How does this wording sound?

chelseamb11

Chelsea Middle Lastname

AND

Alexander Middle Lastname

ALONG WITH THEIR PARENTS

REQUEST THE HONOUR OF YOUR PRESENCE

AT THE SACRAMENT OF THEIR MARRIAGE

ON SATURDAY THE TWENTY-THIRD OF JUNE

TWO THOUSAND AND TWELVE

AT ONE O'CLOCK IN THE AFTERNOON

AT CHURCH

CHURCH ADDRESS

CHURCH CITY

 

Any input is appreciated! Thanks!

professorscience

Shouldn't it be "as they receive the sacrament of marriage" or something like that?  Your way is fine, it just seems a little off.

Riss91

you could also do:
Together with their families
Chelsea
and
Alexander

bibliophile2010

I'm with Prof. Sci. that "at the sacrament of their marriage" sounds off. I like her suggestion if you're trying to keep it short and sweet and still include the sacrament in there.

professorscience

Also, I am a proponent of leaving "and" out of the year, but I have seen the arguments about that over on E, and that is definitely a "to each her own" issue.

Louisa1000

I agree. The sacrament isn't the event you want their presence at, since it lasts until you die. The mass is the event. Almost sounds like you're inviting them into your marriage.