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Input for NFP/FAM

I have been lurking on the page for several months but never formally introduced myself. Posting makes me nervous because I have never been on a message board before! I am always afraid I will break a rule! Anyways, after reading many of your posts about NFP/FAM I found there seemed to be a consensus that Taking Charge of Your Fertility was one of the best books out there. I am currently half way through the book and I love it! My wedding is in August so I am hoping to get through the  book and start charting early so I can get the hang of it. My issue is that so many people laugh about it. I am shocked at the responses I get from friends and family. They all laugh and say I will be pregnant right after the wedding even though we are trying to avoid getting pregnant for a little while. How do you handle these people? Educate them about FAM? Or just brush it off? My FI is willing to use whatever method I choose and doesn't seem to care either way. I know their opinion shouldn't make a difference but I never know what to say in response.  How do you respond?

Re: Input for NFP/FAM

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    ring_popring_pop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I've never talked about birth control methods with friends and family so I've never encountered this. My mom asked me once if it was "counting days" and I just told her that it's much more sophisticated than that.

    I think I'd just respond something like, "And if we have an accident, it will be a gift," and then stop discussing it.
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    Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
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    edited December 2011
    the worst is when your doctor tells you it will fail.  the general population, i expect mockery/doubt, but to have a medical professional mock it or disbleieve it, now that was shocking.

    i try to educate when i can, but i honestly dont let it bother me.  the proof is in hte pudding with us, so to speak.  ive been charting i think 26 cycles now,  no baby, and most know that i'm on the fence about even having one (and when i first started i was definitley not interested in having one).  the only real snarky comment i got was from a good friend (catholic) who replied "good luck with that" when i told her i was charting.

    i self taught with TCOYF.  i loved it, because it was scientific, rather than religious (although i am charting for religious reasons, the health benefits are just an added bonus!). 

    my only regret is not starting sooner!
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    newlyseliskinewlyseliski member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think it could be a good teaching moment... but you're so right that peoples' reactions usually range from mockery to incredulity!  Janet Smith writes a good article that explores the history of contraception and might have a few good talking points for you... just google "Janet Smith contraception" and it will probably pop up.
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    catarntinacatarntina member
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    edited December 2011
    I don't talk about my BC methods with too many people.  My best friend knows, but she doesn't judge me.  It's not really anyone else's business as far as I'm concerned.

    I think you explain just how scientific it is, and it's not like a method where you just count your days.  If people still laugh at you, well... It's not really their business how you decide to plan your family.  That's between you and your husband.   Whether your reasons are religious, or for health issues, or just preparing for when you plan to TTC in the future, you have to do what is right for you and your family and only you and your husband can decide that.
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    edited December 2011
    I love to brag about how awesome the Creighton Method is if birth control ever comes up in conversation. So many women think artificial contraceptives are "liberating," but knowing exactly what's going on with your body and fertility is so empowering and I'm not afraid to share that. Also, since everyone (from California, at least) is huge on organic stuff and going green, I like to say that NFP is the organic and effective family planning method. Evangelize in love and charity :)
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    edited December 2011
    I'm really, really excited to start my Creighton class next week.

    I try not to talk about that stuff with my family, especially since they accept but don't totally "get" my faith and my practice thereof. They actually gave me a hard time once for abstaining from meat on a Friday in Lent. That said, if it does come up, I explain it as well as I can and with love, science, and patience. They all want me to get pregnant right away anyway, so I'm sure it will be a bigger deal when we have 2-3 kids and they "decide" it's time for sterilization which is a major no-go for us.
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    edited December 2011
    <font color="#000000">In Response to </font><a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_input-nfpfam?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:9e50e917-24d0-4a4f-afd7-fa90e6190ceaPost:775498a7-e6ae-449c-bbab-cc8e5373f2b2"><font color="#000000">Re: Input for NFP/FAM</font></a><font color="#000000">:
    [QUOTE]</font><font color="#000000"><strong>the worst is when your doctor tells you it will fail.  the general population, i expect mockery/doubt, but to have a medical professional mock it or disbleieve it, now that was shocking. 

      i loved it, because it was scientific, rather than religious (although i am charting for religious reasons, the health benefits are just an added bonus!).  my only regret is not starting sooner!
    </strong>Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

    My doctor told me I'll end up pregnant shortly after stopping the pill on NFP/FAM. Gee thanks doc. *rolls eyes*

    I'm doing it for health benefits more than religious. Newly Catholic, so I don't have that background behind me yet.

    </font><table border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" class="DiscussionList_ListTable"><tbody><tr class="ForumsTable_TRcolor"><td class="DiscussionList_ListTableImg DiscussionList_TDThread"></td><td class="DiscussionList_ListTableName"><span class="knot_thread_title"><a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_input-nfpfam" class="DiscussionList_NewContent"><strong><font color="#000000">Input for NFP/FAM</font></strong></a></span><font color="#000000">
    </font><a href="http://community.theknot.com/cs/ks/user/default.aspx?membershipid=4176161255266475&plckUserId=4176161255266475" target="_blank" class="username_knot"><font color="#000000">dgarofalo08 </font></a></td></tr></tbody></table>
    OP - I only talk to my sisters (who used it TTA and TTC when they got married) and my best friend who I actually introduced to the method.
    I try to educate where I can, but I don't push it if someone is not willing to listen.
    We know that it works (if used properly and diligently), so have faith in that.
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