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NFP?

jms173jms173 member
First Comment
in Catholic Weddings
Hi everyone,

I've never posted on this board before, but I hope you ladies will be able to help me out =)  I am getting married in June and my FI and I had some concerns with NFP.  We have been together for 6 years and have abstained because we are waiting until we are married.  We would like to practice NFP, but are just nervous about how effective it is at avoiding pregnancy.  How has your experience with NFP been?  Has it been effective?  How long have you practiced NFP?  Have you had any problems with charting?  Any other advice?  Thank you SO much in advance.. I really appreciate it!
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Re: NFP?

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    ExpatPumpkinExpatPumpkin member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My husband and I just started and it's worked so far ;)  But that's not really a reassuring track record...  If you really follow the rules, it should be 98-99% effective.

    I can tell you that I have one friend who prevented pregnancy for the first nine years of their marriage and another who had only planned pregnancies (three) in ten years. 

    Here's a site that should be helpful:

    http://christianfamilyplanning.net/index.php?topic=1246.0

    The particular thread that I posted is successful TTA testimonials...
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    akg0053akg0053 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I tend to know more people who had NFP not quite work as well as they would have liked, but I can definitely say it can work. 

    I charted for awhile (I have a condition that requires treatment with pills, so charting for me now is basically pointless) but I had no issues. I will be very honest though... learning to wake up at the exact same time every day to check your basal body temp (BBT) was quite an adjustment, but that's because my schedule varies daily (whereas if you are on a pretty set schedule then it probably won't be as big of an adjustment).

    Also, if you haven't done so already, read Taking Charge of Your Fertility (often abbreviated here to TCOYF). Fertility Friend charts can work well for TTA couples, so I would recommend getting one of those. 

    Your local drugstore has a BBT, which are more accurate than normal thermometers, so definitely grab one of those.

    Hope this helps! 
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    akg0053akg0053 member
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    edited December 2011
    Also, your puppy is precious. 
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    Not caring about missing RSVPs because there aren't any rocks!
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    boogerbearoriginalboogerbearoriginal member
    First Comment First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    We've been charting for 3 months now and no baby - not sure if that's the reassuance you're looking for but I've heard a lot of success stories. Most of the 'whoops baby' stories I've heard seem to involve people who either don't abstain as long as they should or don't have regular consistent cycles. However, the reason its acceptable in the church is because even though you abstain during fertile times, you are still open to life should it occur. If having a baby would be a serious issue at this time, financially or whatever, then you will need to be extra cautious about abstaining when there's a chance of fertility. 

    I've found waking up within 30-45 minutes of the same time each day gives me pretty consistent temperatures and on weekends I will often check my temp and go back to sleep for a hour or two. I use a normal digital thermometer.

    I went from being on BC so my first chart was really wonky, plus I think there's a bit of a learning curve to determining what the different fluid consistencies look/feel like. This past month I feel I've really started to get it.

    If you'd like to do this, I suggest you start charting now to get a feel for it while you are abstaining 100% so you won't be concerned. And then when you are married, you will have a good regular chart pattern established. Definitely recommend TCOYF I referenced it a TON these past 3 months as I get the hang of this.
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    Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011

    i have been charting one year now.  i love it!  i wish i had started it years ago.

    folks who know me IRL know i am so not into having a baby any time soon.  that said, i feel totally comfortable with the method and have not been stressed at all about getting pregnant.

    provided you follow the rules, and have the discipline to practice self control during your fertile times, you should do great!  given that you have abstained as long as you have, i'm guessing the discipline piece will not be a problem for you.

    i self taught myself the method by reading "taking charge of your fertility" as another poster recommended.  its so simple its ridiculous.  i got the hang of it after about 3 months.  TCOYF actually teaches Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) which is basiccally identical to NFP except it allows for condom use during the fertile phase.  however, we chose not to use condoms both because we dont want to use BC and because it seems risky to have sex during a time that you know  you are fertile in the event the condom breaks.


    there are many threads on here about NFP and a ton of us doing it.  i encourage you to give it a try.  i think you'll be pleased with the efficacy and simplicity.  also, it will help you immensely when you are ready to have a baby, as you will be able to pinpoint the best days to have sex in order to achieve pregnancy.

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    Riss91Riss91 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_nfp-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d16ae166-aa45-4fa2-b685-c195222e676cPost:0b1aa36f-9e8f-4f17-a05d-1ee6ba91d245">Re: NFP?</a>:
    [QUOTE]i have been charting one year now.  i love it!  i wish i had started it years ago. folks who know me IRL know i am so not into having a baby any time soon.  that said, i feel totally comfortable with the method and have not been stressed at all about getting pregnant. provided you follow the rules, and have the discipline to practice self control during your fertile times, you should do great!  given that you have abstained as long as you have, i'm guessing the discipline piece will not be a problem for you. i self taught myself the method by reading "taking charge of your fertility" as another poster recommended.  its so simple its ridiculous.  i got the hang of it after about 3 months.  TCOYF actually teaches Fertility Awareness Method (FAM) which is basiccally identical to NFP except it allows for condom use during the fertile phase.  however, we chose not to use condoms both because we dont want to use BC and because it seems risky to have sex during a time that you know  you are fertile in the event the condom breaks. there are many threads on here about NFP and a ton of us doing it.  i encourage you to give it a try.  i think you'll be pleased with the efficacy and simplicity.  also, it will help you immensely when you are ready to have a baby, as you will be able to pinpoint the best days to have sex in order to achieve pregnancy.
    Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

    This - to a "T". It really is as effective as any other form of BC - IF (and that is a big "IF") you are following the rules and are responsible with it.  Those that do wind up having an unplanned pregnancy using this method most likely weren't following the method properly. There are cases where your body could send mixed signals and you could misinterpret them, so it is always a good idea to use the "when in doubt, abstain" rule.  Many of us are using NFP, so feel free to ask questions <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

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    agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Temping is only used in one method. There are several methods too so if one is difficult to learn you can try a different one.


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    Jay+MarissaJay+Marissa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to NFP?:
    [QUOTE)  I am getting married in June and my FI and I had some concerns with NFP.  We have been together for 6 years and have abstained because we are waiting until we are married. 
    Posted by jms173[/QUOTE]

    Dude--that's us! We've been together for 6 years and we're getting married 1 week before you!

    So, obviously we haven't put it into practice yet, but I have been charting for a year using CCL's Sympto-Thermal method. The hardest part is remembering to take my temp in the morning, but mucus observation has become second nature.

    I can give you a success story from my parents, though--they've used it for 23 years. For the first 8 years of their marriage, they wanted to have a lot of kids, and were very lax--4 of us were born 18 months apart.

    After #4 my dad lost his job, and my mom obviously had enough on her plate. So they decided to hold off on more (5-6 was always their target) 4 years later they were ready again, and they conceived my youngest sister in the exact month they intended (my mom had to have major dental work and could not be pregnant during it, so NFP was a lifesaver)

    Though my mom has always wanted one more, our family moved quite a bit and there never was a good time. My youngest sister is now 12 and there have been no babies since.

    In my mom's words, "It works when you need it to" (i.e. if you buckle down and follow the rules, you will have a very good success rate)

    Good luck!
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    jms173jms173 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thank you soooo much everyone for the info and advice.. it makes me feel a lot better about the effectiveness of NFP.  I am definitely going to pick up the book you all suggested and get started now, while I'm still 2 months out from the marriage.  I really appreciate all the feedback!! =)
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    agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It is very good to actually have a teacher. This helps so much. It is rare for cycles to be perfectly textbook and a teacher can help decipher them.


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    Jay+MarissaJay+Marissa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Ditto on the teacher--I highly recommend CCL. They have lots of support and explain it from a Catholic perspective. You can also have your chart looked at my a doctor if you are having trouble.

    http://ccli.org/
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    agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Creighton method is the one that is used for health problems. Some docs can use the sympto chart, but the ones that are tied to napro technology which is healing and helping fertility use the Creighton method.
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    akg0053akg0053 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Good luck! If you have any questions, we're here to help :o)
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    Not caring about missing RSVPs because there aren't any rocks!
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    AriaGooseAriaGoose member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know another lady posted about Creighton model, but I just wanted to put in some more details....

    It is a FABULOUS form of NFP because you don't have a lot of the issues people cite with normal NFP such as waking up at specific times, internal exams, and difficulties with irregular cycles.  I use it right now due to health issues to try and fix some hormonal problems prior to getting married, but it works great for understanding your body and your fertility.  Even with my VERY irregular system, I can tell when I'm fertile and when I'm not!  It's fantastic!  It is also endorsed by the Catholic Church when used to prevent pregnancy, as NFP, for extreme reasons.
     
    I believe it is listed as a 99% success rate if used correctly.
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