Time between ceremony and reception

notyetavet

Hi Ladies!  This is my first time posting on this board. I've been lurking here for a while.  I'm hoping you can give me some advice!

My FI and I are getting married on June 2nd.  Our ceremony starts at 2:30 in the afternoon.  We are not going to have a full mass because I am not Catholic.  Our reception starts at 6:00 pm.  The church and the reception site are about 30-40 minutes apart.  I can't imagine our ceremony going past 3:30, and even accounting for 20-30 minutes for everyone to leave the church, that still means that there will be 1.5-2 hours to kill before the reception starts.  There is no way to move the reception start time up any earlier, and we obviously cannot start the ceremony any later.

Do I need to provide some other form of entertainment for this period of time?  I've been to 3 other Catholic weddings that had this amount of down time and I didn't think it was a big deal, but I'm afraid that if people end up going home/back to their hotels, then they won't come to the reception...

Cliff's notes: do I need to book something to entertain my guests for 1.5-2 hours between ceremony and reception?  TIA!

Tami87

I also having a gap, which is unpopular on the knot. I think we are going to try to do some type of hospitality suite at the hotel which is pretty close to our reception site with beer and wine and a few snacks, just so people have a place to go in between if they want to.

I recently went to FI's cousins wedding and they had nothing planned in between. They also had 2:30 ceremony and 6pm reception, although they did have a full mass. The reception was at the hotel we were staying at so we just went back to our room for the gap. Some people freshened up or even changed in between. FI's family thought nothing of this as I guess it is expected in their circle.

lalaith50

I've been to weddings that had some sort of extra "cocktail hour" before the reception, and weddings that had nothing.

I think part of what you can take into consideration is who your guests are. For example, if a lot of your guests are from OOT but won't be staying in a hotel, it would be *very* nice to offer an activity (one idea I've heard is to rent some sort of bus and have someone give them a tour of the city.) For us, almost *everyone* either lived in the same city as the ceremony, or was staying at a hotel, so they could go home or back to their rooms and freshen up/relax, and we didn't feel it necessary to entertain them for the 2-hour gap.

professorscience

I was going to say what Lala did about OOT guests.  If they're not from where the wedding is, having a gap without offering some form of entertainment is kind of rude.  That said, I think a lot of people understand the "Catholic gap."  Ceremonies have to be scheduled around mass, which means they can either be on the early side, or they can be very, very late.

I've heard that sometimes the parents of the bride or groom will open their home to guests for the gap (if it's a small guestcount, obviously).  You might also check with the hotel you've booked to see if they would do something.  I went to a wedding recently where there was a gap, but everyone was invited to the hotel for drinks.  We had to pay, but all the guests of the hotel (most everyone) had two drink tickets each.  It was a good way to kill the hour or so that we had to wait, and then cocktail hour started.

notyetavet

Our wedding is near where we both grew up and most of our family is still in the area.  The total number of OOT guests will not be that great.  It's mostly just our respective college/work friends that I know will be more than able to find something to do. The main hotel is about 15 min away from the reception site and I will have a shuttle running between the two places so guests don's have to drive if they don't want to. I think I'll call the hotel and see what sort of space they have to see if I could set up some sort of light snack for people who need to kill time.  Our guest list is too long to ask FMIL/FFIL if they will have people over officially, but I know that they will probably end up with some family (especially Grandma) for the gap.  

Luckily, the reception is in an adorable little town that has a ton of shops and such.  If I were a guest at my own wedding, I'd probably walk around downtown and grab some ice cream or something.  Would putting a list of things to do in the area on our website be a good idea? 

professorscience

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_time-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d29e13b8-11bd-4fba-a55b-010e7a8ecc88Post:ee5d50c9-3357-40ef-bcbd-6b86ab0c28d0">Re: Time between ceremony and reception</a>:
[QUOTE]  Luckily, the reception is in an adorable little town that has a ton of shops and such.  If I were a guest at my own wedding, I'd probably walk around downtown and grab some ice cream or something.  Would putting a list of things to do in the area on our website be a good idea? 
Posted by notyetavet[/QUOTE]

<div>I think that's a great idea.  I know my website had a whole page dedicated to "things to do in Dallas."</div>

ootmother2

We hosted the guest in one of the villas on the venue grounds.  Wine, sparkling water, cheese, fruit, etc.

It was only about 1 1/2 hours and our guests are all used to some gap.

banana468

I'm Catholic and can tell you that most people in my family and social circle DO NOT understand the gap. 

I've dealt with two.  In the first, the aunt of the groom hosted us at her home for snacks.  In the second, I was in the wedding.

Please do what OOT did and host something.  No one wants to play tourist in wedding clothes.

Calypso1977

any way you can just do a cocktail hour from 4-5 and then dinner at 5?

notyetavet

Unfortunately, there is no way I can alter the cocktail hour start time.  I think I would like to do a combination of all of the suggestions I've been given.  I know that our friends would probably enjoy being tourists no matter what they were wearing, but there will also be some people who would rather have some place to relax with light snacks.  I'll have to look into what the hotel across from the reception site has to offer.

professorscience

Did you block a set of rooms at the hotel?  From what I've seen among my friends, even if we're just going to a wedding downtown, it's still fun to get a hotel for the night to just get away.  Could you see if they can open the bar to your guests?

Also, are you staying in a hotel the night of the wedding?  Could they do something for you?

notyetavet

I have blocks of rooms at two hotels.  One is across from the reception site (though I think that my parents, one OOT couple, and my FI and I will be the only ones staying there; it is rather cost-prohibitive).  The other is 10-15 min away (I will have shuttles running at the beginning and end of the reception).  I'm sure between those two hotels, I'll be able to find something for the guests to do. I just don't want to spend a ton of $$ on the "between" party since we will have plenty of food at the cocktail hour and dinner with an open bar throughout.  

Ciardasully

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_time-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:d29e13b8-11bd-4fba-a55b-010e7a8ecc88Post:1aad39d3-2445-4b31-91ba-ca290cda16d0">Time between ceremony and reception</a>:
[QUOTE]Hi Ladies!  This is my first time posting on this board. I've been lurking here for a while.  I'm hoping you can give me some advice! :) My FI and I are getting married on June 2nd.  Our ceremony starts at 2:30 in the afternoon.  We are not going to have a full mass because I am not Catholic.  Our reception starts at 6:00 pm.  The church and the reception site are about 30-40 minutes apart.  I can't imagine our ceremony going past 3:30, and even accounting for 20-30 minutes for everyone to leave the church, that still means that there will be 1.5-2 hours to kill before the reception starts.  There is no way to move the reception start time up any earlier, and we obviously cannot start the ceremony any later. Do I need to provide some other form of entertainment for this period of time?  I've been to 3 other Catholic weddings that had this amount of down time and I didn't think it was a big deal, but I'm afraid that if people end up going home/back to their hotels, then they won't come to the reception... Cliff's notes: do I need to book something to entertain my guests for 1.5-2 hours between ceremony and reception?  TIA!
Posted by notyetavet[/QUOTE]

I have a gap as well (Wedding at 1:30, Cocktail Hour starts at 5) but our reception is at the hotel where we have a block so I hope people won't be inconvienced. But as a guest,  I went to a wedding that I was aware of the gap and wasn't put out because the invitation specifically said when the reception started.  I had been to many weddings where we went to the reception right after the ceremony and we waited and waited while photos were being done. 

ElisabethJoanne

The Catholic weddings I attend, we just have lunch or dinner at 3pm. It's been non-Catholics where I've been stuck with a gap.

newlyseliski

Welcome to the board!!

Will they let you have a receiving line at church after your wedding?  That could help to kill a little time.  In my personal experience, most weddings I've been to have had gaps... but I think it varies regionally and can also be based on what your family/friends are most accustomed to. 

At the last wedding I attended (2 weeks ago)... there was a gap of about the same length you mentioned and the couple had included a small insert in the programs of free and/or cheap things to do between the wedding and reception as well as a map to the reception.  Myself, my husband and friends all just went to a restaurant near the church and had a drink before heading over to the reception!

sigmaurse

Most of the Catholic weddings I've gone to which is most of the weddin's I've attended, have not been immediately followed by the reception. Usually it's 3-4 hrs later so that the Wedding party can take pictures after the ceremony and before the recepton. I've never been invited to a wedding that had any activities between the wedding and reception, usually I just go home for a few hrs or just do my own thing. I don't think you are required to entertain them for 2 hrs and they shouldn't be mad about the break in between.

memilie

My (convert) fiance and my (Protestant) mother were both competely horrified at the idea of a 2.5 hr gap, so now I'm having a morning Mass followed by one hr of pictures (with a 'cocktail hour') and a lunch reception.